Yes! Dragons Exist! 6n4454

Yes! Dragons Exist!

by David J. Wighton

Book #33 in the Wilizy Series

Smashwords Edition

Copyright 2021, David J. Wighton

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Acknowledgements

Cover design by Rita Toews at E-Book Covers, East St. Paul, Manitoba.

Image from Gordon Johnson @ Pixelbay.

New Characters

Hell and the Inner Pentagram • Leviathan (Blubber-Guts) and Berith (Toadstool).

Hell and the Protect Your Home business • Head devil operating in Hell: Byffy. • Executive devils operating on Earth: Dyffy, Hyffy, Spyffy, and Wyffy. • Teenage Burglars: Slick, Donkey, Lint-free, Magic and Numnuts.

Mermaids • Merly, Murray, and Merabel.

Cuba • Hector (President) and Francisco (Vice-President).

North Korea • Esteemed Leader (a.k.a. Esteemed Cow Pie); Miss Moneypenny. • Bob, the not so invisible dragon; Yong, an imugi.

Table of Contents

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10 Chapter 11 Chapter 12 Chapter 13 Chapter 14 Chapter 15 Chapter 16 Chapter 17 Chapter 18

Chapter 19 Chapter 20 Chapter 21 Chapter 22 Chapter 23 Chapter 24 Chapter 25 Chapter 26 Chapter 27 Chapter 28 Chapter 29 Chapter 30 Books in the Wilizy Series About the Author: David J. Wighton

Chapter 1

"I went for a swim the other day." A male voice. "Good. You could use the exercise." Another male voice. "What's that supposed to mean?" "It means you're overweight. You shatter all the chairs you sit in. That's why you have to lie in a hammock. Your two flunkies have to hoist you out of the hammock with a winch so that they can wheel you home. What does that tell you?" "I've always been big." "Retirement has not been good for you. Where'd you swim?" "Indian Ocean." "Did you see any Indians?" "I saw some mermaids." # # # # # # # #

"I want to talk with you about Belphegor's wealth," Winnie said to Lillian. "Is this the wealth that you took out of his Bank of Hell with fake unlimited lines of credit?" "Yes. He thought all of the people in his plot had spent his money, but they didn't know anything about it." "Where is it now?" "It's still in the Bank of Hell, but I've hidden it."

"Why do you want to talk about it then?" "Banks do audits. If they find this money, they might start wondering about Belphegor and why his wealth is in Satan's bank when the bank was accusing him of overdrawing his ." "How much money are you talking about?" "More than a million in tormentts. I don't know how to value it in any other form of currency." "How would you get it out of Hell?" "The same way that Belphegor supposedly did. I'll issue some bankcards with unlimited draws on that . Their bank records don't reveal how many draws are spent. Their system also doesn't identify the person holding the card. After I'm done, I'll destroy the bank along with the bankcards. Hell won't be able to trace anything. But we have to do it before they start rooting around Hell looking for Belphegor. That could be any time now." "What would you do with the money?" "That money has to be spent on something. It can't be saved for another time. We'd have to buy some things from some companies on Earth and have them delivered somewhere. Those companies will be paid with tormentts as usual. We'd get stuff that we could use." "You've obviously thought about this. How would you spend it?" "I'd spend it on Cuba." "You'll have to see Guinny." # # # # # # # #

"Are you sure about the mermaids? Did you approach them?" "I'm sure," Overweight Guy said. "I saw mermaids and mermen. No, I didn't

approach them. I didn't want to scare them off." "How many were there?" "I was too far away to count properly. They were building a nest." "Mermaids haven't been on Earth for centuries." "When did they disappear?" "Somewhere around the 5th century when the Greek gods were replaced. They took the mermaids with them." "Did we ever find out where they went?" Fatso asked. "No. The Greek gods went to their home planet, wherever that is, I suppose." "And now the mermaids are back. How? Why?" "I dunno," Porky itted. "It's only a small number. Not much of a feast. More like a little snack." "You're always thinking of your stomach." "I can't help it. Mermaids are tasty." "You should be thinking about who brought them here and why." "Somebody in a space ship brought them." "Who do we know has spaceships?" "Huh," Glutton guy reacted. "Exactly. How long has it been since you went for a long swim?" "A long time. There's nothing to eat in the oceans except plastic." "Go for a long swim. Check out the oceans. You need some exercise." "I'm quite buoyant in water. While I'm doing that, could your staff build me a

mermaid pen?" "Easily done. Don't eat them all at once. We may want to question them." "I'll ration them out." Back to the Table of Contents

Chapter 2

"Why Cuba?" Guinny asked. "Karita, Cassie, Meghan and Paula researched the country as part of our operation to stop Belphegor's biological threat," Winnie replied. "The Cubans are very needy. The country is doing all that it can, but it needs a completely new solar and wind power infrastructure and a broader national diet. I was thinking chickens. They have none. They have a small tourist economy but the women are forced to act as prostitutes so that they can earn foreign money." "The country's government?" "It's a military government complete with secret police. Nobody is getting wealthy though." "And how would you get the money to them without revealing that it came from Heaven?" "I was thinking of an anonymous boat load of what they need the most." "Are you trying to replace the government? Don't hide your face from me when you answer." "If it happens, it happens. But right now, these people are starving." "Hell had an ongoing presence in Cuba, right?" "Yes, through Belphegor. His subordinate had monthly meetings with the government and took notes of what they needed. I don't know if they ever received any help from Hell though. Belphegor wouldn't have given them anything. He was a hoarder." "If Hell learned that Cuba had received an anonymous gift of everything they needed, wouldn't that prompt them to think of us? It sounds very heavenly to me."

"Yes, but they can't track the money to us." "If they suspected we were trying to buy Cuba's allegiance, might that prompt Hell to try to buy some other poor country's allegiance? That kind of allegiance buying happened on Earth in the 20th and 21st centuries. " "But Hell is supposed to torture. They're not supposed to give aid to poor countries." "And we're supposed to protect mortal souls, not give countries financial aid." "Doc and Granny's team are giving medical aid to poor people." "They don't give any medical assistance for poverty. They give medical assistance to counter Hell's health tortures. Big difference." "But..." "Heaven can't interfere in a country's domestic government or economy. We combat devils and devils are not making Cuba poor. This sounds like something your family could do. They have lots of money from their MescalMeth operations." "How do you know that?" "I listened in on a meeting of the directors. They're having another one tomorrow morning." # # # # # # # #

"Tell me again," Merly asked. "Why are you taking me to meet some of your family tomorrow?" "I thought that you might need a break. You've been working a lot on the plastirondiamium project that William gave you." "I have to it that it was becoming boring." "I try to visit with my family on Sundays whenever I can. Maddy does too. She'll

be there and will take care of you when I'm in a meeting. You'll have to be careful of what you say. Mermaids, Poseidon, seeding Earth's oceans.... all of this is super secret. My family, as a whole, doesn't know about it. Your name is Merly. You are 13 years old and you live on an island in the Pacific Ocean called Hawaii. You met Maddy at a restaurant there when her university team was playing in a baseball tournament. When you grow up, you want to study marine biology. You enjoy swimming a lot. Use some of the time before we leave to read up on Hawaii. They'll ask you some questions about it. Is your brain plug working so that you can read now?" "Yes. All of us mermaids received brain plugs as soon as we arrived." "What are the others doing?" "Building our nest." "Let me warn you about my mother. She will try to extract information about me from you. She'll be sneaky abut it. You know very little about me. You're Maddy's friend and ..." # # # # # # # #

Hank started the official part of the day. "This meeting of the Wilizy directors is called to order. The date is Sunday October 10, 2095. Present are Yolanda, Stu, Jock and Hank. Mac is attending as a guest as is Winnie. Mac, you wanted the meeting. Go ahead." "I need to report that a part of our MescalMeth operations are not succeeding. Abject failures would be a more accurate description. The military arrests of the druggies are going well. After the arrests, the Valkyries have been successful in bringing justice to the people in the towns who had been working for the druggies." "That leads me to the part where the Valkyries have been trying to counsel and assist the women who have been working with the druggies as sexual assistants. We had thought that given the opportunity, they would want to turn their lives around. We have provided counsel and money for them to do that. Unfortunately, their new lives have proven to be a brief interlude between prostitution jobs.

Without exception, the women have returned to prostitution even though, in some cases, they did seek training in non-sexual jobs. We couldn't change, or influence, their attitudes or experiences that had pushed them into prostitution. A solution might be possible, but we don't know what it is." "This is not surprising," Stu responded. "I hope that the Valkyries aren't looking on this as their own failure." "They were at first," Mac responded. "But none of them had success, and we have some very good women in the group. They are concerned though that they are wasting their time when it could be better spent elsewhere." "Any suggestions, Mac?" Yolanda asked. "The Valkyries had to take so much time trying to rescue the women that this caused our military operations to stall. They want to focus on cleaning up the towns that the druggies occupied so that we can move faster through the states. We've done the western states. We want to go east now." "Jock, any comments?" "I what the Valkyries and Mac are suggesting. William has given us new battle gear that incorporate easy-to-operate jet packs, titanium armor, and light sabre weaponry. When we had to wait for the Valkyries, we spent the time training. In that regard, the delays were useful for the program. We can take on another military force if we had to." "Do we need a motion?" Hank asked. Stu responded first. "This is just a slight change in an operation that we have ed in the past. We should treat Mac's report as simply that. A report on how the MescalMeth operation has been working and the minor adjustments they are making." "Moving on then. Winnie, you wanted to address us?" # # # # # # # #

[You know what Winnie is asking for. We'll skip that part.] Hank was the first to respond to Winnie's request. "The family has had issues in the past when some of us have urged us to become involved in another country's domestic affairs. This has caused us some discomfort. Are you asking us to give these anonymous gifts to the Cubans in the expectation that they will change their type of government?" "No. The military government is doing the best they can. Yes, they have secret police and informants. But all the Cubans know who those people are. The government pays the secret spies. It's a form of job. They will never escape from abject poverty without a modern power infrastructure. Plus, they need more protein in their diet. A fishing industry can't provide that because the government is afraid that the people will use the fishing boats to leave the country." "Don't they use forced labor?" Stu asked. "Yes, everybody has to work. So in that regard, it's forced labor. Even seniors have jobs sweeping streets. That means that everybody is employed. Without everybody working, the country can't feed their people. This style of government is working for them." "Do we have the money, Jock?" "Yes. The money that we've confiscated from the druggies is more than what Winnie needs. That money is not doing anybody any good right now." "I like the idea," Yolanda revealed. "There is no other source of for these people." "Stu?" Jock asked. "I have a bad feeling about this. Some people don't like charity. I expect government leaders would feel the same way." "Would they turn it down if it were offered, Stu?" "I doubt it, Yolanda. They're desperate. Just don't expect any thanks." "Winnie will have to monitor this," Jock added to Stu's unease. "The government

is too poor for the leaders to take secret rewards. That may change." "Any other concerns?" ... "All those in favor of giving Winnie enough of the MescalMeth funds to provide the Cuban people with a modern power infrastructure and enough chickens for every family to have several, raise your hand." ... "Motion es. Winnie, have you ever been around chickens?" "No, Dad." "They stink and they don't fly. Don't drop them from a transport. Enjoy." # # # # # # # #

"I had to meet with Mac after the meeting, Maddy. How'd it go with Merly?" "The little babies really liked Merly. She got down on the floor and they were crawling all over her. Then the moms had to feed them and Merly was watching them closely. So was I. Bean offered to answer questions, so that was nice." "How'd it go with my mother?" "She was pretty sneaky but Merly said she hardly knew you." "So, all in all, the visit went fine?" "Well, not quite. I was telling them about my job as a batgirl and how I had gone to Hawaii where I met Merly. Then Grandma asked a question and it got a little crazy. Here's the conversation." Do you play baseball, Merly? No, I'm not old enough.

Would you like to play baseball when you're older? "Oh, oh," Winnie reacted.

Yes, I think I would. What would you like most about baseball? "Maddy, I'm not going to ACK."

I think I'd like first base best. I could be good at that. "I'm not going to ACK."

But, now that I have the twins, I might like second base too. What do you mean about these twins. My boobs. They're new. "I'm not going to ACK."

I don't know about third base. For reasons I can't tell you, I don't think I should let a guy touch me below the waist. Bean tried to explain. Yolanda, she's talking about baseball sex. Oh. That reminds me of the time when Hank and I were dating. We were ... "ACK."

Back to the Table of Contents

Chapter 3

A week later. "How was your swimming excursion through the oceans?" "I found an underwater manufacturing site in the depths of the Pacific Ocean near the Juan de Fuca Ridge." "What were they manufacturing?" "Hard to know. Some sort of metal sheets." "Light? Heavy?" "My swimming body does not come with functioning hands." "Right." "I found another manufacturing site nearby which was making diamonds and storing them in nearby trenches." "We could steal them." "They were very deep and I have no hands. How long can you hold your breath underwater?" "Forget that then." "Both sites appeared to be fully automated. I saw no evidence of any mortal working down that deep." "Is that the good news?" "It is if you're a mortal. Humans have learned how to mine in the deepest parts of the ocean. Somebody is making lots of secret money." "Humans always try to make a lot of secret money."

"In manufacturing those metal sheets, they are using plastic from the ocean as raw materials. I saw robotic carriers that were collecting the plastic from the surface and delivering it into a red-hot magma fissure. Somebody is cleaning the oceans, Berith." "You seem happy about that, Leviathan." "I am. I'm the only devil in Hell who can swim down to that depth. I can destroy their equipment. I can eat whoever comes to repair it, and, with some creativity, I can steal all their diamonds. Can your techies build me something that I can hold in my mouth to collect the diamonds?" "I want equal shares on the diamonds. You can't steal them without my staff's help." "It was my idea and my find. Sixty percent for me." "You wanted a mermaid pen if I recall." "What about it?" "I'm having some difficulty with the pen's design." "How much will it cost me to make that difficulty go away?" "Ten percent." "I won't steal any diamonds until I've eaten all of the mermaids." "How many mermaids?" "I counted twenty-one." "Twenty-one days to finish them off?" "Make it thirty. I like to marinate them." # # # # # # # #

You're probably wondering what kind of devil doesn't have hands. You might also be curious about Porky's appetite for mermaids. You may recall that Keely told Winnie and her crew that there were only four remaining inner pentagram devils and they were named Belphegor, Berith, Leviathan, and Mammon. With Belphegor's unplanned visit to the other side of the Cosmos [Book #32], Hell's Inner Pentagram was now an Inner Triangle. Inner Pentagram devils were among the first devils to work in Hell. These devils chose their unique bodies. That was well before some Satan with a perfectionist obsession decided to give everybody the same devil body. Scales, horns, tails, cloven hooves, and so on. Let's talk about Leviathan now. Like all devils, Leviathan had two bodies. He needed the usual reptilian body so that he could navigate through Hell's sewers and live in Hell's caves. That body was grossly overweight and, as mentioned already, he could barely use it. His staff had to winch him in and out of a hammock. However, he used a different body when he was on Earth, although it too came in an extra hefty size. Every other devil appeared on Earth as a human male or as a human female. Leviathan's earthly body was unique. That body had appeared on all of the antique maps of the world when ocean travel was done in wooden ships. Those maps contained an image of a giant sea monster with the face of a dragon and a body of a coiled serpent ready to squeeze the life out of you. That image signified that this area of the ocean was dangerous. Ships and sailors could disappear. The giant sea monster was blamed for all such disappearances. And rightfully so. Even back then, Leviathan had a healthy appetite. He'd squeeze a wooden ship until it cracked open and the humans came spilling out. It was like eating peanuts. You couldn't stop with just one. In our vocabulary, the word leviathan means somebody or something that is extremely large and powerful. And that was Leviathan back when mortals' wooden sailing ships plied the ocean waves looking for anything precious to steal. Leviathan was looking for anything tasty to eat. For mortals, he was the most feared devil that Satan ever had. But, that was back then. Sea serpents couldn't exist in the ocean any longer, not with metal ships and propellers that could slice serpentine skin. Faced with new

marine transportation technology, Leviathan had to broaden his torture earning opportunities if he were to survive in tormentt driven Hell. In response, he developed two sincomes. First, Leviathan was able to afterlive off the royalties that he collected for the use of any image of a fire-breathing serpent that appeared in mortal media. His monopoly was made possible with sleazy mortal agents and numbered companies. For example, check out the ad for Eduardo's Spicy Meatballs in Montevideo, Uruguay. That's Leviathan's face on the label. If you see a firebreathing monster in any media, that's Leviathan's face. They can't include his body because it's too big, long, and fat to fit on the screen. Second, since devils aren't creatures that can swim, Leviathan had no competition for water-borne torment. In effect, he owned the rights to profit from any torture that took place anywhere in Earth's oceans and seas. Whenever torture happened in salt water, Leviathan earned a royalty. That torture sincome started to disappear as the oceans became polluted and people couldn't travel in ships. But Leviathan had a work-around. He argued with Satan that since polluted oceans were a torture for the world's future as a whole, and since it happened in salt water, he should have ongoing royalties event though he hadn't produced the plastic. Satan agreed that killing oceans deserved recognition. That decision made him enormously wealthy and untouchable in Hell. Once the oceans went past the point of no return, Leviathan settled down to an easy retirement in a hammock. With no exercise, and with a healthy appetite, the hammock had to grow in size and sturdiness as Leviathan's devil body continued to grow. Obviously, a giant sea serpent would not be able to live in Hell. Travel in PUS cars, for example, would present enormous challenges. His serpent body couldn't be accommodated in one of the PUS cars. Even if it did, trying to slither his serpent body into a car that had doors that opened and closed automatically would be impossible. How would he eat with no hands? He needed a body that could live in water and which had hands and a voice box. The solution was a gecko, a form of lizard. As a gecko, Leviathan could stand on his two hind legs and eat food with his front legs that served as his hands. Leviathan had been living in Hell in his gecko body for centuries when one of the devils that controlled Earth's insurance companies had a bright idea for a

commercial. The pitchman for the commercial would be a small, talking gecko. By now, Leviathan was huge in height and girth. He was definitely not cute; the word repulsive comes to mind. Nevertheless, his hellish body was close enough to the gecko's body, so Satan decreed that Leviathan would earn royalties for this image. The insurance devil gave his cute little lizard a British accent, because Leviathan's real voice was akin to the voice of a Russian mobster, which wouldn't attract too many clients. This brings us to present time. Some meddling mortals were cleaning Leviathan's oceans and that would threaten his patents and royalties. Leviathan had an easy solution. He made a win-win agreement with Berith - the source of the other half of the dialogue you've been reading. But first, he had twenty-one mermaids to eat. After that, he'd steal the diamonds and destroy the robotic equipment. What could possibly go wrong?

Back to the Table of Contents

Chapter 4

Winnie, I need help. A monster has imprisoned the family. It killed Merable. Where are you, Merly? Near the nest, which is in the Indian Ocean. The family warned me not to approach the nest. Are you safe where you are? I don't know. We thought the nest was safe. I have a GPS fix on you. Stay on the surface so that I can find you. Come as a dolphin. Something is hunting mermaids. # # # # # # # #

Start at the beginning, Merly. Where were you? I was working at the mining location and decided to come home. It's a straight swim southwest to Australia. I swam between that continent and two big islands. When I got past them, I could hear the nest warning me not to come home. They were penned in with some sonic walls. If they approached too close to an invisible wall, the sound was unbearable. A giant sea monster went right through those walls and they tried to scatter but the pen was too small. It captured Merable in its coils and killed her. Then it took her out of the pen and dropped her onto the ocean bed. They can see her, but can't reach her. How long ago was this? We have no sense of any age of time underwater. I can't hear the nest. Can you hear them?

No. I moved out of range. You know how deep the nest is. Take me down to the same approximate depth. # # # # # # # #

What did you find out? It's too deep for a human without oxygen and protection. Let's go back to the surface. ... Give me as complete a description as you can of the sea monster. ... Let's surface. I'll message a friend in Heaven and include you in the conversation. ... Shields, I have an emergency deep under water near Australia. I've been using a dolphin body. What weapons does Heaven have that work underwater? Weapons against what? A submarine? No. Weapons against a sea serpent. It has a dragonhead and a very long body of coils that ends in a tail. It kills mortals by squeezing them in its coils. Are you pranking me? No. One mermaid is already dead. ... We have nothing that will work deep underwater. How deep can Heaven.1's sensors penetrate?

They won't work under water at all. They weren't built for that. A submarine's sonar system would work. They operate off sound but we don't have any submarines. Hand weapons? Can't be wielded under water. Hand to hand combat? Hard to know. We'd need to find the vulnerabilities of the serpent body. You personally would not be able to fight a sea creature underwater. Don't even think about that. In an emergency, could any of Heaven.1's weapons be able to serve as a distraction? Yes. A missile fired into the water would create an explosion in the water. There'd be noise and a lot of hot water showers. The mermaids are imprisoned inside a sonic pen. If they approach the walls forming the pen, they experience huge pain levels. They can't fight their way through. Presumably, that pen will keep rescuers away as well. Do we have anything that can take down that pen? How deep is it? Deeper than scuba depth. Perhaps. How soon can you get here? Is the serpent's return imminent? Perhaps. I would have preferred 'No.' I'll have to use Heaven.1's lifeboat. Galahad will crew that. He's been listening in since you asked about hand-to-hand combat. How close are you to the pen?

Not close at all. In five minutes, swim to a location where you are right above the nest. Stay on the surface. # # # # # # # #

As instructed, Merly and Winnie were floating on the top of the water when Galahad landed Heaven.1's invisible lifeboat a short distance away. He turned off the cloaking device and Winnie changed from a dolphin to her own body and climbed in. Shields stepped into the water in her astronaut gear, complete with oxygen tank. Merly took her hand and they both disappeared below. Here's the nice thing about astronaut gear. The only thing an astronaut can hear are instructions coming inside her helmet from the lifeboat. It's sound proof otherwise. Credit Shields for realizing that. Winnie quickly established a voice-to-voice connection and listened as Shields described the descent. After Merly bobbed to the surface, took mortal form and clambered into the lifeboat, Galahad engaged the cloaking device again. They listened as Shields described her descent. "I see the nest and they can see me. Merly told them that I would be there so they're waving. The pen can't be floating freely around, so I'm looking for its anchors into the seabed. One of the mermaids is motioning me to come closer." ... "She's stopping me now. Visibility is good. I'm walking laterally and looking for a foreign object." ... "There's a flat disk in front of me. It's not anchored to the seabed. This suit is impervious to a stassis charger, so I'm lifting it. It's heavy. I've seen this kind of disk before. The shell is part of Hell's old angelic stassis chargers. The on/off switch is on the top. I'm depressing it now and putting it down in its original location. I'm checking to see if I've left any footprints. I did. Swirling those clear now. From now on, I won't set foot onto the seabed. Moving laterally again. I'll

let you know when I've found them all." ... "Send Merly down now. I think I've turned off all the transmitters. She can test." ... "All clear. Merly is in the nest. I can't hear anything but I can see they're happy." ... "Now they're not happy. Two of them are lifting the dead body and are coming up to the surface." ... "Merly and the rest of the mermaids are searching the nest and putting some things in containers. Now, they're all out of the nest and are floating to the surface with those containers." ... "Shields, we are loading the mermaids into the lifeboat now, but there are too many. We'll need at least three ferry trips to Heaven.1. How are your oxygen levels?" "I have plenty of oxygen. I'll turn the pen's transmitters back on and come to the surface. Where are you taking them?" "Good idea on turning the pen back on. We'll take them to Heaven, for now. Can you find this site again?" "I'll store it in my GSP memory." "Do we have any surveillance devices that work under water?" "That's a very good question, Winnie. Right now, I'd say No." "Galahad, would any halocratic cameras be floating in the sky?"

"No." "Winnie, Murray says that the creature travelled along the sea bed. He's essentially a giant snake. I doubt you'll see him above the surface." "Thanks, Merly. I'll talk with Joe-Joe as soon as we get home about underwater surveillance." "But, no hand to hand combat. Right?" "Don't be silly." [Serpents don't have hands; so how could it be hand-to-hand combat if I took him on?]

Back to the Table of Contents

Chapter 5

Halloween was a suitable day to have a meeting about a devil inhabiting the body of a sea serpent. This particular meeting tested the limits of Winnie's boardroom. Present were: Lillian, Joe-Joe and Keely from the senior angels. Winnie's team was all present: Paula, Cassie, Meghan, Maddy, Karita and Shields. Plus Galahad. Guests were Murray and Merly. Thirteen in total, including Winnie. Winnie opened the meeting but couldn't tell them much. "All we know is that Hell has a devil who can take the form of a sea serpent and likes to imprison mermaids. He killed one, and in time, probably would have killed the entire nest. The stassis charger shells that he used to imprison the mermaids are a clear link to Hell. The mermaids can be made safe here in Heaven, but my fresh water lake is not big enough. Even a salt-water sea would be a temporary solution only. JoeJoe and Lillian, do you know anything about a devil like this?" "We do, actually," Lillian responded. "We haven't seen or heard from him for several centuries. His name is Leviathan and he's an inner pentagram devil. He used to ambush sailing ships, crush the ships, and eat the sailors. I suspect that's he was planning to eat all of the mermaids. I doubt that he would know anything about an electronic pen, so he likely has a partner who gave him those devices. He must have become active when he learned of the return of the mermaids." "How would he have learned?" Winnie asked. "Smell? Sound? If the mermaids chattered together, he could have heard them from a long distance away." "We did chatter," Murray said. "Can we defeat him in battle, Joe-Joe?" Winnie asked. "Emphasis on the we," Galahad added. "I heard about the questions you asked Shields and her answers. She was right. We have nothing in our current arsenal that can work under water. His

impregnability is not because of his body. His body is mostly devilian type scales covering flesh. The problem is that very few weapons can operate underwater. Guns of all kinds, for example, won't work. Same for knives and other sharp implements. I doubt lasers would work. A high powered harpoon could work, but only if the harpoon traveled though the air and struck his body on the top of the water." Joe-Joe paused and continued. He wasn't giving them any good news here. "A homing torpedo might work, but we don't know if it would be triggered by a soft body. It would have to be triggered remotely. Even if that did work, we don't have any torpedoes. We'd have to develop the weapon and test it. We don't know if such a weapon would even kill it. I know of some instances in mythology where creatures could grow back parts that had been removed." "The Wilizy have a light sabre," Winnie offered. "Might it work, Joe-Joe?" "You have to be very careful if you are touching something electrical while you are in water. Water is an excellent conductor of electricity. Your body can become electricity's path to the ground if you are touching water that touches electricity. I wouldn't want to be holding that light sabre. Plus, I would be very reluctant to put Merly in the water in her robe and invite the serpent to attack her. She might be the one who is electrocuted." "Could we use sonar to track him, Joe-Joe?" "Back in the 20th century, the United states and Russia used sonar buoys that could detect a ing submarine. Submarines had hard bodies and would reflect sonar pulses. Leviathan has a soft body. Tracking him that way would not likely work. Plus, we'd need millions of the buoys to cover everywhere he might go." "Keely, do you know anything about him?" "Only that he was inner pentagram. He wasn't active at all when I was in Hell. I saw no reference to him in the Sindusty award nights. I wouldn't even know what industry to put him in. We do know where he works in SinSin-atti because we researched all of the inner pentagram devils." "How much will Leviathan set your plans back, Winnie?" Lillian with the question.

"He completely stops our attempt to clean up the oceans. He also prevents us from seeding the oceans with fish. We can't keep the mermaids out of their proper habitat for too long. Our equipment at the mining site might be compromised if he finds it, wonders what it is, and decides to squeeze it." "We should tell William immediately," Merly warned. "He told me that the robotic equipment was very complicated." "I have an idea." Everybody breathed a sigh of relief and looked at ... Maddy? "We know where he works in SinSin-atti. We should watch that office and wait for him to return from Earth. We'll see what body he uses in Hell. We watch him until he comes to Earth. When he changes to his serpent body, we put a tracker right into his body. I bet he doesn't have many pain sensors on that huge body. From that point on, we'll know exactly where he is on Earth. The mermaids can go back to Earth and set up some nests. If he starts coming near them, they can move to another nest." "Brilliant," Meghan said. Brilliant was not an adjective previously associated with Maddy. At least, not before this meeting. "Wonderful," Karita ed in. "I like it. I like it a lot," Winnie said. "Eventually, we'll have to put him down, but there'd be no rush if we adopt Maddy's plan. Galahad, can you take care of the tracking device? Perhaps we should install two in case one falls out." "It'll be easy. We have compressed air-powered darts that will work. The shooter will have to be close and invisible." "I'll do that in my Wilizy body as soon as he enters the water," Maddy volunteered. "Can I track him?" Murray asked. "The technology is a little tricky," Galahad demurred.

"I'll show him," Shields offered. "I have a fish body here somewhere that we can tag with a sensor. He can learn on me." "Cassie and I can set up shop in Hell. Both of us know where his office is." "We have a plan," Winnie closed the meeting.

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Chapter 6

Monday, the first week of November: Leviathan returned from Earth, changed into his gecko body, went straight to Berith's office, and tried to barge in. That didn't work so well. It took him several attempts to squeeze in. "Berith, Your sonic wall didn't work. All of the mermaids escaped and they took my lunch with them." "That's impossible. That wall worked." "If so, explain why no mermaids are in the pen now." "You didn't set the sensors in place properly. Did you turn them on?" "Look for yourself." Leviathan dropped a heavy waterproof backpack on Berith's desk. [Narrator: With no hands on his serpent body, Leviathan had been forced to convert to his Gecko body, with hands, to put the sensors in place. Normal lizards don't have gills and so they cannot live underwater. However, Leviathan's gecko body was able to live underwater because it could create a giant air bubble above its nostrils from which it inhaled and exhaled. The capacity of the bubble meant that it had to return to the surface every fifteen minutes to obtain more oxygen. This ruled out deep underwater forays, like to the depths where the diamonds were hidden. However, the depth of mermaid nests was within its range.] [Narrator again. It may be hard for my readers to believe, but some lizards can actually create air bubbles and swim underwater. If you want to look it up, the name of the species is Anolis Aquaticus. Everything I write in the entire Wilizy series of books is true. Of course, you already knew that. Right?] "Well?" Leviathan prompted Berith.

"The sensors are all turned on." "They were working fine when I imprisoned the mermaids. They tried to escape and couldn't. They were working fine when I captured one of them, took her outside and squeezed her. They tried to get to her, but couldn't. Now, all of them are gone including my lunch. Explain that." "You missed one of the mermaids. She found them penned up and rescued them." "She wouldn't have been able to approach the pen. Try again." "Somebody else rescued them." "It would have to be somebody that can live underwater and can't hear. Name that creature." ... "Your system failed because it works only intermittently. When you fix that problem, I'll find the mermaids again. Then, I'll enjoy them. Only after that will I collect some diamonds for you. That was our deal. You agreed to that." Leviathan's angry and resolute exit would have gone better if he hadn't needed Berith to get behind him and physically squish him out the door. # # # # # # # #

Also on Monday: Paula to everybody in Operation Serpent: Leviathan's devil body is a grossly fat lizard that can stand on two legs. We don't have to worry about following the wrong body when he leaves his office to return to Earth. Cassie and I will take turns watching him. We should know where his cave is by the end of the day. # # # # # # # #

Tuesday: Before fake dawn in a certain bedroom in a castle. "Groan. Who was that?" "The space port: Angelion has sent us the four spaceships they owe us." "They could have told you that at a reasonable time." "I've been bugging Angelion to deliver them. We'll call the ships Heaven.4, Heaven.5, Heaven.6 and Heaven.7. Heaven.7 will be the scout ship. The rest are freighters." "You're getting up now?" "I have tons to do. I'll be tied up with these ships for weeks. I can't help you with Operation Serpent any longer." "Are the tracking devices ready to go?" "Not yet. Shields can develop them for you." "Don't I even get a kiss?" "Kiss, kiss." Air kisses don't count as kisses. # # # # # # # #

"Groan. Yes?" "Winnie, the schedule for the University of Arizona Wildcat's games is out now. We're on the road this weekend and they put me on the team as batgirl. Maureen wants me at all the practices so that I can fill in when she needs an extra body. You're OK for Operation Serpent, right? Karita says that she can take my spot with the air darts. I won't be available until after baseball season is over." "Thanks for letting me know, Maddy. What you'll be doing is way more important for your career in baseball."

... Sigh. Might as well get up. I should do something about Cuba. # # # # # # # #

Wednesday: "Winnie, you know that we have four new ships in the dock. Galahad is swamped. He wants me to develop a crew development program. We won't be able to crew the freighters with military personnel. I have to set up a recruitment program for angels who want a different job, find instructors, develop training modules, and complete a host of other tasks. I can't continue with Operation Serpent. If you need me for a physical battle, I can make it. But Maddy could take my place too." "Did Galahad say anything about the tracking devices we'll need." "They're simple enough. Somebody else will have to do them." "What you'll be doing is way more important than Operation Serpent. You'll do great, Shields." # # # # # # # #

Thursday: "Cassie! What a surprise." "I didn't know who else to ask. Can we talk?" "I shouldn't be giving you advice about your love life, Cassie." "It's not about my love life. I don't want to marry Jacob. It's about my sex life. I don't want to have sex with him again. I don't even want to be around him. Jacob wants me to help him check all the new ships for maintenance problems. He said that he really needs me."

"Was he talking about needing you for work? Or did he need you in some other way?" "I don't know. He had this look about him. If I say that I'll help, I know he'll ask why I haven't been answering his calls." "So tell him why." "We had miserable sex. How am I supposed to tell him that?" "Without getting into details, does he know that the sex was miserable?" "He had to know. Why else would he have gotten up and left so quickly. I mean we had hardly..." "No details. Was it miserable for you? No details now." "I was disappointed that the Earth didn't shake." "That's a myth." "I didn't see any shooting stars?" "Myth." "What about fireworks?" "Also a myth. Where did you find your information about how sex is supposed to end?" "Romance novels. They are very descriptive about how the woman feels afterwards. I didn't feel like kissing his feet either." "That novel would have been written by a man. Forget everything about those books. I read a ton of them when I was pre-teen. They aren't realistic depictions of actual sex that a normal woman might have with a man." "Huh." "If your time in bed together had ended just before Jacob got up to leave, would you have been happy?"

"Uh huh." "So what were you expecting him to do?" "He was supposed to take me in his arms and we'd fly to the moon with star dust trailing behind us." "Really?" "That's what is supposed to happen. Word for word. I wrote it down." "What you wrote down won't happen for any real women like us. We're not fictional characters in a book. How did he leave you?" "He got up, said 'See you,' and walked out." "That could have been better. Does he listen to you when you suggest ways for him to get along better with people?" "Yes." "So, you know that if you asked him to behave in a better way after sex, he'd listen to you?" "Yes, he would." "Jacob has never had a close relationship with anybody before. He doesn't know what to do in any social setting, let alone sex. Is that right?" "Yes." "And perhaps he didn't even know what to do?" "Well, I did..." "No details. Cassie, you've wanted to have sex for a long time. Now you know what it is. You have to decide now if you want a friendship that can grow into a more intimate relationship. Or, do you want to stop seeing and working with Jacob. Neither of you is ready for sex. If you want to continue seeing him, you have to forget everything that you read in those books. Be happy with a friendship with somebody of the opposite sex. Does it make sense to start real

slow?" "Yes." "Jacob has no idea how to treat you as a girl friend. You'll have to explain about holding hands, perhaps kissing." "We went to first base but we didn't stay there long. I was..." "No details. He'll listen to you. Take it slow. The road to true love is slow." "It's more than three bases?" "Yes. Forget about baseball sex. Does this help you?" "I thought that I had done it wrong and you would tell me how to do it better." "That wasn't going to happen." "Thanks, Winnie. I'll tell Jacob that I'll help him with the ships. By the way, I won't be able to help any more on Operation Serpent." "Operation Jacob is way more important for you, Cassie." # # # # # # # #

Friday: "Winnie, I have to back out of Operation Serpent. Guinny wants me to set up a new hornocratic division for space ship drivers. You don't really need me." "What you'll be doing will be more important for Heaven, Keely." # # # # # # # #

Saturday:

"Winnie, my daughter is having major meltdowns. Chelsea says that I'm away from home far too often. I have to bail on Operation Serpent. If you need me for a day, I can probably help." "No worries, Meghan. Take care of your family. They're far more important for you. " # # # # # # # #

Sunday: "Do you have a minute, Winnie?" "Joe-Joe. Are you bailing too?" "I'm not in a leaky rowboat, Winnie." "Are you going to give me bad news?" "No. I have to check with you about the tracking devices that you need. I have a prototype. I thought I could test it on you first. Can you make yourself into a serpent?" "I could kiss you, Joe-Joe." "Not as a serpent, you won't." "I meant ..." "I'm not ready for first base. We should hold hands first."

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Chapter 7

It's the beginning of the second week of November. Paula, are there any signs that Leviathan might come to Earth soon? There are barely any signs that he's alive, Winnie. He just lies in the hammock in his office. He does nothing, he has no visitors, he makes no calls, and he receives no calls. He has two flunkies who do nothing during the day except care for him. They deposit him into his hammock at the beginning of the workday. They bring him food on a regular schedule and he eats a lot. They winch him out of his hammock at the end of the day. They drive him home on a custom-made mechanical dolly, help him into his cave, set him up for the night, and leave. What's his cave like? The floor is covered with thick bubble wrap and piles of pillows. When he comes in, he collapses on the bubble wrap, which has to be industrial grade to take the load. One flunky hands him a remote clicker; the other brings pillows to his head and shoulders so that he can see his big screen high on the wall. What does he watch? Hell's nature channel, which has endless clips of predators killing their prey and eating them. He falls asleep in the middle of the program and doesn't wake again until his two aides return. I have no idea why he goes to his office because he's just a blob there too. Periodically, he asks if anybody had called. The answer is always 'No.' That's his day. Are you going stir-crazy with Cassie not able to spell you off? It is becoming a little tedious. How long have you been on your own? I haven't keep track.

How much strength do you have in your hands? Can you squeeze anything? I have no strength in my hands. I can lift small cans with my arms and legs. Why. I want to bring you home. Give me an hour and call me back. # # # # # # # #

It's me. Paula, we can't wait for Leviathan to finally decide to go back to Earth. The mermaids have to get on with their new lives and we need to start cleaning the oceans. Joe-Joe is making the compressed air tracking device for us. Maddy suggested that we fire a tracker into Leviathan after he has changed into his serpent body. You and Karita are going to put that tracker into him while he's in Hell. As soon as Joe-Joe's tracker is outside of Hell, it will send me a message. I'll find Leviathan before he reaches an ocean and we'll pick him up there. This way, we don't need a babysitter constantly watching him. Karita will fire the tracker and I'll keep a watch out for intruders. Exactly. # # # # # # # #

"How'd it go?" "I don't think he felt a thing. He certainly didn't move. You wanted to talk with me?" "Yeah, Paula. I feel bad about leaving you all by yourself on that assignment. It must have been terribly boring." "I just turned my brain off. Ghosts can afterlive alone by themselves for a long time. I'd wake up if he did anything noticeable." "Are you OK to start another assignment tomorrow?"

"Sure." "What about a leave first? What do you normally do on your leaves?” "Go to Montana. Watch my girls." "How are they?" "Lohla and Lucas are away a lot with the operations against the druggies. Lohla is a ranking officer in the Angels. She leads them into combat. The cadets look up to her because she's fearless. Lylah is finding being alone with Azure a little daunting. I think she's by herself too much, but I haven't heard her say anything. Several months ago, she had been with the other Wilizy moms everyday for a play date for kids and she was enjoying that a lot. Marie was babysitting MarieJay and that was very interesting because she was babysitting with the help of Voodoo, which she used to give the babies a nap and the moms could rest at the same time. They're not doing play dates any more because the other babies are too old to have naps." "How do you know so much?" "I don't need to sleep, so when heaven is sleeping, I watch my girls. I get a lot of visits in when the time difference is right. Azure had a very nice birthday party. She's already talking a bit. She's scooting on her bum to move around. Sometimes she looks where I'm hiding and I swear that she can see me. She points her finger right at me. But she points her finger at a lot of things." "When was she born?" "October 7." "OMG!" "What?" "OMG! OMG! Heaven has been so insensitive. I've been blind. I'm so sorry." "For what?" "You gave birth to a baby and Heaven ripped that baby out of your hands. You

haven't been able to hold her, cuddle her, or kiss her. You haven't been able to do anything that a grandparent would do. You can only watch. That must break your heart." "Winnie, I'm dead. I don't have a heart. I know how my family is doing. Most dead people don't get to know that." "You're not dead, Paula. Your body is dead. Everything else about you is alive. Don't you want to hold Azure?" "Yes, but I can't. So, I am happy with what I can do. I don't worry about things that I can't control." "This is not right. Everybody else in our team has somebody." "Cassie doesn't." "She has a chance to have a relationship. I told her that her expectations about sex were too unrealistic." ? "Don't look at me like that. She approached me and asked for help." "Shields doesn't have anybody." "Not yet. But, with lots of seats available at our meeting, she sat next to Murray. Then, she offered to help him learn the tracking technology. Shields and Murray are different species but since when did that stop anybody?" ? "Again, with the face. So, I notice couples who might end up in love with a little help from a friend. But I didn't notice your lack of an opportunity to show grandmotherly love. What's been your cover with my family so far?" "They knew me as Nymph and I was a coworker with you. I backed off on my clothes because they were too risqué. I helped them decorate their house. That was about five years ago, I think."

"You need a new cover. Let's give you a job in Calgary, which is the closest big city to the camp. You left the security company because you didn't like the secrecy. You like being friendly with people. You job in Calgary has something to do with young moms and babies. You choose the job. Perhaps something from the interior decorating background that they know about. You bring Azure little gifts that are samples of the things that you're selling, making, promoting, whatever. You like to be with Azure because you're supposed to know something about babies, but you don't. You aren't married and haven't been in a serious relationship yet. Being around Azure and her mom will help you in your new job a lot. At some point, you can ask Lylah if she would mind if you dropped by on a regular basis so that you can learn the things that you need to know about babies. Age yourself five years. Dress professionally. Give yourself a young woman's clothes and hairdo. Don't appear as a fuddy-duddy." "I bet your pardon." "Paula, you dress like a fuddy-duddy. You're not old, so don't act old. You have insecurities about your job and your future as a young vibrant woman. You might be ready for your own family, which is why seeing Azure is so important to you. If necessary later, we can invent a boy friend for you. You may have to have sex with him, but that's a good five years out. You will become a friendly aunt, who will be around Azure for years and years." "I don't know what to say." "Don't say anything. Go to Calgary. Figure out what job you want. Find a way to prevent Lylah from ing the company and asking about you." "I had given them an email address that they can use to find me." "Good. Once you have figured out your job and are ready to visit, let me know and I'll pave the way with Lylah and with the camp's security. When you've had your visit, come back here. I have an operation for you and Karita." "Shouldn't I be doing that first?" "No. What you'll be doing will be more important for you and your family. You're going to have a family again." Back to the Table of Contents

Chapter 8

Paula and Karita were having their first meeting as a team. It was the third week of November. "You have a nice home, Karita. I love the idea of a mountain chalet." "I thought that we could meet here. It's quiet and we can spread out." "Where's Reese?" "He's in London. We don't see other much these days. Winnie's assignment comes at a great time for me. I had nothing that I wanted to do. I've had enough studying. I want some excitement." "Bringing the four pest control devils in Tucson to justice may not be all that exciting." "For me, it is because I get to plan the operation. Do you mind? You've been working with Winnie longer." "I don't mind. I'm not great at planning. I'm good at helping though. Just tell me what you want me to do." "You did a full report on the Protect Your Home business. Perhaps you could hit the high points with me so that I'm up to speed." "We found out basically what they were doing. We didn't have the time or any access to information to determine why they were doing it. We were left with lots of questions in our mind. For example:" • "They have a thriving business that cons people into ordering fake fumigations followed up by fake annual house examinations. They must be making lots of money. What to they do with that money? Why are devils conning people out their money? Meghan said that it wouldn't qualify as torture because the people don't know that they are being conned."

• "Robbers/fumigators use the information about the house's valuables to smash and grab. We assumed that the robbers were the fumigation workers. We don't know if that's correct. We don't know how many teenage fumigators/robbers they have. We don't know if they are allowed to keep the proceeds of their robbery. Plus, we don't know why the devils are enabling them. What do the devils get out of this?" • "Their key and lock business gives the devils access to master keys that they seldom use. Is there more to this business than that? They are going to a lot of expense to make that business respectable. Why?" # # # # # # # #

Hey, Stu. Do you have time to talk? I do. I'm working on this Cuba deal. I couldn't find a source of solar and wind power infrastructure in North America. I'll start looking elsewhere. When I find the source, how will we transfer the money from the Wilizy to them and not reveal where it's coming from? We can use a numbered company. There's no way anybody could trace it back to us. Could I ask you to set that up? I'll be happy to. How are the chicken plans coming along? I'm working on the infrastructure first. The chickens will be harder. Momaka just told me that Japan has always had a strong industry in renewable energy. Please thank her. I'll look there now. This project is harder than I thought it would be. Speaking of chickens, why did the rooster cross the road?

To get to the other side? No. He crossed the road to see his divorce lawyer. Do you want to know why he had a divorce lawyer? I surely do. His wife was a real henpecker. Lawyers shouldn't tell jokes. I've been told that. Do you know why Humpty Dumpty fell to pieces when he fell off the wall? I wait to hear why with great anticipation. He wasn't hard boiled enough. Are you done? Nope. Do you know why an old chicken could only lay eggs in winter? Why? She was no spring chicken. Last one. Do you know why the chicken couldn't the marching band? I confess I do not. He had broken his drumstick. This doesn't sound like you, Stu. Have you gone insane or just slightly crazy? Petey spent a couple of hours with William this morning. Ah. Now I understand. He decided to write a book of chicken jokes and he's on his fifth page. I gave you the best ones. And how is Momaka coping?

She's muttering a lot of Japanese words and I don't think they would a purity test. She says the jokes are all my fault. Well, you are henpecked, Stu. # # # # # # # #

"How should we start, Paula?" "If Winnie were doing this, she would research the four devils so that she'd know more about them. We should do that." "OK. How?" "We know where they live and we know that they keep normal business hours. Let's break into their house and look for information while they're at work." "We can do that. Ghosts can get into anything that's locked, right?" "Pretty much." "You take care of that. I'll look through the loose stuff." "Winnie would plant drones too. Do you want to do that?" "You can if you want." "I can't pick anything up in my spirit body. You'll have to do it." "I did not know that about you." "What body will you be using?" ... "I should use my invisible body in case they have spy cameras." "Let's go rob a burglar's house."

# # # # # # # #

"Well, that was a waste of time," Karita complained. "Two lost days is nothing. Winnie never said that we had a time limit. I think we should find out their devil names soon. That may give Winnie a chance to look them up in Hell's computers." "You want to know their ages too?" "And their ranks. We both commented on how they spent their free time." "Playing computer games non stop," Karita recalled. "PornoGuy was a very young devil and he had the same affliction." "You think that they're young?" "I don't know. But it's worth finding out." "Should we look at their offices next?" "You're the boss." "I think we should search their offices tonight." "Sounds like a plan." # # # # # # # #

"What did you think, Paula?" "You first." "I saw a very typical mortal business office, I think, but I haven't seen any such offices. They had lots of information about their business that they could hand out to customers. I found boxes of brochures, business cards, cost sheets for the

programs they offer in the big closet." "What can you conclude from that?" "They are here for the long haul." "What else did you notice?" "I saw one very big office with four desks and four comfortable chairs behind them. The contents of the desks were very similar, meaning somebody else set up the office for them following a pre-designated formula." "What else?" "They had a meeting table with five chairs. That says that there will be times when five people will be in this office." "Clients?" "Possible, but the office is not listed in the building directory. "That's one more question we have to answer then. Who is the fifth person who comes into the office? What else have you noticed?" "There's a server in the utility room with a printer. They don't have printers at the desks. That means the computers are networked. What the room design and the networked computers mean is the devils are able to see and hear what each other is doing. Do devils mistrust each other, Paula?" "Always." "So, they are in an office where it's not possible for one devil to cheat the other. They all know what each is doing. That's not an accident. Somebody above them set this up." "Yes. Anything else?" "How do they meet with their clients? They appear to want to keep their location a secret." "The person who meets with the clients might sit in the fifth chair."

"That means that there'd be a mortal involved. That's a bad thing, right?" "Yes. That's very bad. Mortals aren't supposed to know that Hell exists." "We can put drones in the office. I'll also ask Winnie to hack into that server and give us access. Is it OK to send that access to my home?" "You bet, Boss." "I think I'm getting the hang of this." # # # # # # # #

Cassie was also getting the hang of this. 'This' being Jacob. "All I'm saying is that if you said please and thank you more often, I wouldn't feel that you were treating me like a servant. I'm not your servant. I'm your friend." "But it's more efficient if I say fewer words when I'm telling you what to do." "First, you should not think of yourself as TELLING me what to do. If you TELL me what to do, I'll leave. I don't take orders from you. Second, it's not more efficient to use fewer words. If you had said Please, the job would have been completed by now. We wouldn't be having this discussion. You understand logic. Is that logical enough for you?" "Nobody has told me this before." "Now you know. Are we going back to work now?" "Yes." "Only yes?" "Yes. I'd like that." "I think I'm getting the hang of this," Jacob said.

# # # # # # # #

"Murray? What are you doing here?" "I was in the neighborhood. We've established the new locations of our nests. We'll have five scattered round the globe. I had to talk to Joe-Joe so that he could create portals. I asked him about you. He said that you were busy with the new ships." "Busy is not the word. Swamped is more accurate. I have to find a way to attract angels who have no technical skills whatsoever into applying for space ship crew positions." "That'll be challenge. But, they're learning normal navigation, right? Nothing military." "I have to teach them enough so they can handle emergencies. I don't know what skills to keep in and what to take out." "But, do you have to decide that now?" "No." "And you know that you are looking very stressed." "Yes, I know." "And you know that a quiet drink in the mess is often a good way to relax." "I have found that to be true." "And I happen to be going to the mess right now. Joe-Joe will tell me when the portals are programmed and then I have to test them." "Are you asking me to you?" "The thought had crossed my mind. You'd be able to forget about courses for crews. You could relax."

"What would we talk about?" "Would you like to know the five most stupid things that I saw Poseidon do when I was his body guard?" "Will I laugh? I need to laugh." "One of the stories involves Poseidon's efforts to braid the hair of Wife #3. It didn't go too well for either of them." "Let's go to the mess." ... "This was nice, Murray. I'm definitely more relaxed now." "Good. You know, I had another thought cross my mind earlier when you were talking about attracting angels to try out for the crews. I didn't want to mention it earlier, because you were stressed about your job. But, here goes. Why don't you offer angels tours of the solar system as part of an orientation to what they would be doing if they ed up?" "It's a good idea but I don't have the time to do that." "Well, now that we've decided where the mermaids will live, I don't have any responsibilities. And I do know how to fly a spaceship. I'm quite happy to help you out. Think about it. I have to test those portals now. You know how to reach me." # # # # # # # #

Well? How'd it go, Murray? Shields agreed to go to the mess with me to relax. And she likes the idea of the tours of the solar system. Thank you for those ideas. I think I'm getting the hang of this dating thing. Are you sure angels and mermen are supposed to do this courting thing?

Yes, I'm sure. Don't tell Shields that we talked. I wouldn't want to be accused of being a matchmaker.

Back to the Table of Contents

Chapter 9

"White copter, please identify yourself." Paula was the one in the white copter – one of Heaven's spares that allowed angels to fly very slowly but visibly. She was approaching the cadet camp when a white Wilizy plane pulled up beside her. The pilot was staring at her, waiting for a response. He had a helmet on but Paula could see that he was aboriginal. She also knew that he was young. His voice told her that. "My name is Nymph and Lylah is expecting me. What's your name?" The last time Paula had been in the camp, there had been a lot of young boys and girls running around. She wondered which one this was. "My name is Will and I'm on guest duty this morning. Follow me and I'll take you to their home. It's a short flight." Paula ed Will and Izzy because they were twins. They were always squabbling. Some things about twins never change. "Please land on the copter pad directly below. Lylah will be out to greet you." With that, Will pointed the plane 90 degrees up, and accelerated out of sight. Destination? The moon? Teenage boys don't change either. [Narrator: Will wasn't a teenager yet. He was 11, but he was very much into flying extremely fast.] "I you," Lylah said as Paula stepped out of the copter. "You look different." Lylah was holding a squirming baby on her right hip. She had a bottle of something in her right hand. Her hair hung in greasy blonde strips around her face. She was wearing an old pair of sweatshirt and sweat pants. Both of them sported evidence that a baby had been within spit-up range of those clothes. "I'm out of my rebellious stage. Now I have to act responsibly. I think this is a bad time to visit. I'll come back."

"Azure has had a bad couple of days. She's teething and is miserable. I'm trying to put her down to sleep but she won't let me. If I lift her up, she squirms to be put down. If I put her down, she squalls to come up. Everything I do is wrong. Perhaps ... That's interesting." "What's interesting?" "She's pointing at you." "I see that. Is that important?" "Azure has a small g vocabulary. When she points at food, it means she wants that food. When she points at a person, it means that she wants to go to that person. I've never seen her do that to somebody that is not in the immediate family. Still, she seems quite definite what she wants. Would you mind holding her?" "Not at all." ... "That's amazing. She's not making strange. She's not squirming. She's looking right at you." "She has big brown eyes." "Yes. Would you mind if I left her with you for a bit. I haven't had a chance to do anything this morning. I have to get out of these clothes. Ignore the mess." Then, she was gone. "Azure. My name is Nymph." [Narrator: That's as far as Paula got. As she told Winnie later, she just lost it. She broke into tears to the point where she was hyperventilating. She had to take deep breaths and the tears were still streaming down her face. Azure was staring at her and then began touching her face. Pushing on it. It looked like she was trying to push the tears back into her eyes. That got Paula crying even harder.] # # # # # # # #

"Is she still OK?" "Yes. She's touching her mouth." "She's in pain. Teething. I've tried everything. Nothing works." "Do you have any honey?" "Second cabinet from the left, middle shelf. Why?" "It's something that my mother used on me." "I have to put a wash on. Feel free." # # # # # # # #

"You have a sleeping baby lying on you." "I do. She's been asleep for about ten minutes." "Is that sofa comfortable enough for you?" "Yes. I'll shift her to her own bed once she's in deep sleep. Where is it?" "Down the hallway, second door on the left. Did the honey put her to sleep?" "I don't think so. According to my mom, if you put honey on the gums, the sweetness will distract the baby from the dull ache. Also, honey has antibacterial properties that help a baby's teeth push through the gums. Apparently, it had worked on me. She's sleeping now because she has no pain and has been sleep deprived." "I'm going to be a terrible hostess. I haven't slept either. Would you mind? I do want to talk with you about your new job, but I can't think straight right now." "I don't mind. Go to bed."

"When she wakes up, she'll want milk. Wake me if I'm not already up. You're a lifesaver, Nymph. I was pretty close to losing it." "I know the feeling." # # # # # # # #

"Are you OK if I'm like this when I'm nursing?" "No, why would I not?" "I cover up as much as I can if I'm in public, but I still see frowns. At home, I strip to the waist. That makes for an easy switch to the other side half way through. We all nursed this way when we had a play date, but Franny and Mata are too old for that now." "Play date?" "When Azure was born, three other women in camp had babies too. We'd meet each weekday and let the babies play with each other while we moms talked. One of the baby's grandmother had a knack for putting the babies to sleep, so that meant we moms could nap too. We don't do that any more. The others infants are too old for that. It means I don't get my afternoon nap." "Where's your twin?" "Lohla is tied up with our cadets who are training at distant venues. Lucas is too." "So, they're not able to help raise Azure?" "They do when they're at home, of course. But, some of the military exercises keep them away for extended periods. This is one of those times. I look for ways to keep up with my other household duties, but I don't want to shortchange Azure. I'm not normally this far behind. Thank you for doing all those dishes and cleaning the kitchen. I feel embarrassed about that." "Don't feel bad. Azure was sound asleep. I like to keep active, so why wouldn't I

help out? Isn't Lucas' mother able to help you in these kinds of situations?" "I don't want her around Azure too much. Yolanda is a nice lady and she's fine for family dinners and visits, but she becomes very protective with girls. She wants to dress them in bubble wrap, metaphorically speaking. I don't want Azure to feel limited in any way. Lohla agrees. Lohla is not mother-material, but she's very ive of me and of Azure becoming fearless. Between her and Lucas, Azure will probably be a tom-boy, which I'm fine with." "Back when we were working together, Winnie did say that she had to hide some things that she was doing or her mother would freak out. If I were a mother, I'd want my daughter to think that she could do anything. That how I would raise my daughters if I had any." "Me too. Azure is done. Would you like to play with her while I make ourselves a meal?" "I'd like that. I promise I won't break her." # # # # # # # #

"What was that game you were playing with Azure? The one where she was giggling." "I don't know if it has a name. I just thought that I would help her get used to standing. She looked old enough to be ready for it." "She's slightly over 1 year old if you're wondering. She was born on October 7. How did you set it up?" "I sat on the floor facing the sofa with my legs spread. I put Azure on her bum in front of me. I held out both of my hands with two fingers extended and got her to grab the fingers. When she did, I pulled her up on her feet, waited for her to get balanced and then I took my hands away." "That's when you said that you were gonna git her?" "Yes. I tickled her a bit in her ribs and she squealed, lost her balance, and fell on

her bum. I clapped and she copied me. There's no way that she could fall backwards and bang her head because the sofa was behind her. Then we did it again. By the time lunch was ready, she was pulling herself up and lifting her arms so that I could get at her ribs." "Did you do that so she could learn to pull herself up?" "No. I thought that if she weren't afraid of falling, she'd learn how to walk more easily. If you do this enough, when she loses her balance, she'll land on her bum, not on her face." "Where'd you get the idea for that?" "I don't know. Perhaps my mom?" "That's weird. I think I my mom tickling me like that." "Really? That is weird." # # # # # # # #

"Tell me about your new job." "Is Azure OK like this?" "She's in what we call her safe zone. The puffballs on the floor can't hurt anything if she throws them. The living room is child proofed. There's enough on the floor for her to entertain herself. I don't want her pestering me all the time to entertain her. I want her to create her own games. She'll be fine for at least half an hour. I put some honey on the gums ten minutes ago, so the fussing should stop." "Well, I left the security firm that Winnie works for because they had too many rules about not talking about what they do. I come from an interior decorating background, which I liked because it allowed me to be creative. I wanted a job that was creative, but also a job that prepares me to have my own family. I don't know much about little kiddies. I'm working for a foreign firm that specializes in children's toys. They want me to see what toys would work here in North

America. Cultures are so different. They don't want to ramp up production and find a distributor if the toy was not going to work." "We can help you out with the distribution if you wanted. We know people in the WC&D outlets in Canada." "I was looking more for having a test subject, you know like a laboratory test. Do you know anything about laboratory tests?" "I know a lot about them. I see exactly where you're going. You want to see how Azure reacts to having a new toy. Did she play with it? How long did she play with it? Is it safe?" "Yes. I couldn't explain it better myself." "Does your company want official records? Do they want visual recordings?" "They haven't said anything about that. If they did, I don't think I'd agree. The test should be as normal as possible? What if the camera equipment distracted her?" "Exactly. Did you ever think of working in a laboratory? Biological, for example?" "Definitely not. I want to work with living samples. Babies. Children." "Huh. You called them samples. Was your mom employed by laboratory scientists?" "I believe she was. She didn't talk much about her job. She has ed on now." "So did mine. I wish she could be here to see her grandchild." "I'm sure she'd be proud of you and thrilled with Azure." # # # # # # # #

"Azure, it's time for you to go to bed."

"Why is she holding up three fingers?" "Because she wants three books and I get to say yes or no. One time she asked for fifty. That's when I put in that rule." "Did she know it was fifty?" "No, but she knew it was a lot and didn't want to go to bed. We usually snuggle up on the sofa while I read the books. Before I put her into her bed, I smooch her a lot and she smooches me. She'll probably smooch you. She seems quite attracted to you. She goes to sleep fairly quickly. Would you like to do the honors? I'll do the dishes seeing as how you cooked." "I'd love that." # # # # # # # #

"That was adorable." "I didn't see you there." "Were you crying?" "A little. Why was she putting her hands all over my face? Was that a signal?" "No. I hesitate to tell you this, but five minutes after she's asleep, so am I. It's far too late for you to copter home. We have a spare bedroom and it's reasonably tidy. Seeing as how you're a tester, would you like to test it out?" "Thank you. I would. What's your favorite breakfast?" "Pancakes." "Do you have any frozen fruit to go into the pancakes?" "We have blueberries and strawberries in the freezer downstairs." "You look like a blueberry person."

"I am. Lohla was the strawberry girl and I had the blueberries. Mom would make us pancakes when we had something special to celebrate. We weren't exactly rich." "I think everybody likes pancakes for breakfast." # # # # # # # #

[It was some years before the answer to Azure's face touching could have been answered, but wasn't. She didn't do it again after that first day. The family believes that Azure's ability to see face colors as well as her ability to read minds came to her early in life. They know that she had the skills when she was 2-years old and understood what a lie was. That put an end to her parents telling her little white lies like 'Brussels sprouts are tasty.' At one year old, these two instances of face touching suggests that she could read face colors. One could argue that she was touching Paula's face because, as a ghost, she had no face colors. Azure was looking for them.] Back to the Table of Contents

Chapter 10

"How 'd it go?" Winnie asked. "I completely lost it when I held Azure for the first time. I can't believe I did that." [You know all of this, so I'll skip to the parts that you don't know. Paula offered to visit once a month on Saturdays and she'd stay overnight. She'd bring samples from the fictional company. Winnie mentioned that she had been researching Japan for renewable resource companies and had seen a big toy company. Paula said the she would research that company when she had a chance. Then, she left to up with Karita who had some good news. Oh, and she gave Winnie a huge hug.] # # # # # # # #

"I've skimmed through the server's files real quickly. There's a ton of stuff here and I started with their staff calendar. I've tried to prioritize our week. The first thing we should do on Monday is watch their staff meeting at 9 am. They wouldn't call a formal meeting when the four of them are always sitting in the same room, so I think we'll see who takes the fifth chair." "Later on Monday, somebody will be interviewing a prospective client at 5:30 pm. The client's name is Poplaski and I have the address. Their home was probably infected last week but I haven't found any information yet on who faked the infestation and when. That's not in the calendar." "On Thursday, Magic and Slick will be fumigating the O'Ryan house. I have the address. I looked back through the schedule for the previous weeks and the same four names kept appearing as fumigators. Donkey, Lint-free, Magic, and Slick. There's gotta be more information on them in another file." "Real names would help."

"My big find was the company's books. It's not easy to understand, at least it wasn't for me. I thought one of us would have to work on that full time, while the other could search the rest of the server. Which job would you like?" "I'll take the books. I used to keep the books for my ex-husband." "How'd your visit go with your grandchild?" "It was amazing. I was......" # # # # # # # #

Monday. Karita went to the staff meeting and was now telling Paula what she found. "Slick was the fifth person at the meeting. He's a tall guy with slick backed hair. He's the one that will visit the Poplaski home Monday night to do the personal inspection and try to sign them up. One of the devils told him where dead roaches had been left. The purpose of the meeting was to go through the week's activities, which ultimately revealed their entire business model. I assumed that Slick was the oldest of the teenagers and is in charge of them. We already know what the schedule is." "Anything on the devils?" "There is one devil in charge. He ran the meeting. I didn't hear any devil names. He asked Slick if his brother were ready to them. Slick referred to his brother as Numnuts, and he said he was ready. They agreed that one of the devils would accompany him when he broke into the next house and show him the ropes." "That'll make five teenage burglars. We should record that lesson, Karita." "We can't put this in front of any court, can we?" "Probably not, but unofficially, it might be useful because it's showing a devil teaching a teenager how to break in and plant fake evidence. You're going with Slick tonight to the Poplansksi home, right?"

"Yes. Should we tape it?" "I wouldn't. It's only a teenage conman trying to sell a service the Poplanski family doesn't need. I'm not getting anywhere on the books. They're coded in some way. Both of us should go to the Thursday treatment. We'll want to see both Slick and Magic in action when they search the house. Are you OK with me pushing some decisions?" "I'm here to learn, Paula." # # # # # # # #

Tuesday: Nothing was out of the ordinary with Slick's Monday meeting with the Poplanski family. Karita did notice that Slick was a good conman. Obviously, he had done this before many times. Karita found a file on the server that listed current personnel along with addresses and birthdates. It didn't include their nicknames. There were only four names, so the new boy hadn't been approved yet. "What do you see of any significance in this file?" Paula asked. "Slick is 20 years old, Donkey is 18, Lint-free is 16, and Magic is 14. This suggests that Numnuts will be 12." "I agree. What does the progression of ages tell you?" "I don't know, but the two year gap is not a coincidence. Do you know?" "No. I do know that it's another question that we need to answer." "I think that list is getting longer than shorter." "Sure feels that way, doesn't it? What else is significant about that document?" "I don't see anything."

"Why would the devils need to know the ages of their robbers? It'll be clear who is oldest and who is youngest." "They don't need to know the birth dates." "So?" "That document went to Hell. They know that the robbers are underage." "I agree." "How are the books coming?" "I'm taking them to Winnie. I think they're encrypted." "Should we be using the addresses of the robbers to find out more about them?" "You decide." "I'll do it. I need a break from the server files." "I need a break from trying to make sense of an encrypted file. I'll look through the server." # # # # # # # #

Stu, is it safe to talk with you or will you be telling me more chicken jokes? Why? Are you chickening out? OMG. You've gone over to the dark side. Petey's book is ten pages long. I think he's running dry. He's now trying to make jokes from the chicken breeds. It's hard to pull a joke out of Orpington, Brahma, or Rhode Island. Would you say that Petey is an expert in chickens? I think I know where you're going with this.

How old is he? Nine years old last month. I don't have the time to manage the chicken part of the operation, Stu. All we need is a company that can provide us with a lot of fertilized eggs. Or perhaps little chicks. Petey could do that research if Momaka can supervise. I'm still working on that numbered company. Ooops. Hold that thought. I found the perfect renewable power company and it's in Japan as Momaka suggested. It's called Tanaka Solar and Wind. Their web site indicated that they can provide training with their equipment and help with the installation. I thought that Momaka would be the best person to approach them. She would be the best. They would respect her; they'd try to take advantage of you. Could you ask? Hold on. .... She says, Yes, yes, a thousand times yes. I'm disappointed she wasn't more enthusiastic. She has wanted to go back to Japan for some time. What does Bob the Invisible Dragon say about that? Bob hasn't been around for several years now. We were talking about a Christmas trip to Japan, but Petey would be a problem. Why? I thought he had grown up a lot. He has. But, Petey wouldn't understand why he wasn't allowed to share our room.

When the dragon is away, the mice will play? Something like that. ... Melissa! Melissa what? Melissa is bored to death. She's not involved in anything the Wilizy are doing right now. She could supervise Petey. Will and Izzy could in. Are they still arguing about how much air each is taking out of the atmosphere? They became well reasonably well behaved on the last operation. It was that or wait to turn 21 before we allowed them on another operation. We'd need to include Yo-Yo, Jock, Hank, Emily, and Ivanika. There'd be eight. That's fine by me. I'm not supervising them. Actually, it's the perfect Christmas excursion. They can do the research and then go visit the farms. You'll have to allow them to make the decision where to buy. Otherwise, it won't go over well. I'm fine with that. All I know about chickens is what I learned from you. And that was pretty fowl. Good one. Thank you. I came prepared.

Back to the Table of Contents

Chapter 11

"Winnie says that she can't decrypt the books," Karita said. "It needs some kind of personal identification number. She asks if we can pull together an estimate of how much money the company is making monthly." "I'll look in the files," Paula said. "The devils' schedule for next week has them booked off all Monday for meetings. This is the first Monday of the month and typically, that means that every devil returns to Hell. PUS cars will be full to bursting. Meeting rooms will be the same. Who do you want to go?" "You and I?" "It's too dangerous for you. Your shoulder demon body could be dislodged and stomped on." "You can't go by yourself. You and Cassie?" "Are you asking or telling?" "I'm telling." "You'll need to talk with Cassie to ask if she's willing and then ask Galahad for his permission. Also, since you're sending somebody on your team to Hell, you have to ask Winnie if you can do that. Then, Winnie has to advise Guinny." "I didn't know any of that." "Some devils go down the day before so that they can take in some torture pit entertainment. You should let me and Cassie know that we'll need to be monitoring the four devils Sunday." "OK. Will you please tell yourself and Cassie to do that, if she's coming. What will I do if Cassie can't come?" "Meghan is your best next choice. She'll need advance notice." "I think I'll get on this right away."

"I'll look for that company information." # # # # # # # #

"You and Cassie are good to go to Hell. Cassie is looking forward to going. You should coordinate with her on when to start watching the devils." "Will do," Paula responded. "What were your thoughts on your visits to the burglar's homes?" "The homes looked like normal Tucson homes," Karita said. "I wandered around inside and looked at the boys' bedrooms. They had good clothes. Lots of tech stuff. I wouldn't say that they had been deprived of anything. Why?" "I'm wondering why they would take up a life of crime. It could be many normal reasons I suppose. They got in with the wrong crowd, perhaps." "Numnuts was brought into this by his brother." "I'm hoping that they weren't influenced by some shoulder demons when they were very young. That's way against the rules." "Any way of finding out?" "No. Any thoughts about Slick and Magic when they searched the house?" "They were very efficient and business-like. When they were done, they played computer games and hardly spoke to each other." "What do you want to do about Numnut's first lesson on breaking into a home? It's this Saturday night at 8 pm." "Both of us should be there. I'll tape it." "Anything else?" Paula asked. ... "I assume from your question that I should be doing something more, but I don't

know what that is." "I'll pick up Numnuts in his bedroom. I want to see how he's handling his first robbery." "Coerced into it by his older brother?" "Perhaps. I don't see why a kid that age would agree to be part of a burglary team. He has to know that this isn't a one-time job. This could be useful information." "I missed that." "Always try to collect as much information as you can when you're researching for a job. You may throw out half of it, but sometimes you find a gem." "Thanks, Paula." # # # # # # # #

"I wish we could use that tape," Karita wished. "Yes. Watch a devil tell a young boy how the whole con works, including how the boy will be able to keep half of anything that he and his partner steals when the time comes for that. Very damning. Of course, it's not clear that the teacher is a devil." "It was clear that Numnuts didn't want to be there." "Throwing up in the toilet was a clear signal." "Did you notice that the devil pointed out where the bathroom was as soon as they entered the house? This wasn't the first time that a young kid didn't want to be there." "I had wondered why he did that, but I didn't wonder for long. Poor kid." "Did Slick pressure him?"

"Yes. He's a bully. He said he wasn't going to lose his promotion because of him. It wasn't clear what the promotion was." "Perhaps we'll find out on Monday." # # # # # # # #

[Narrator: We haven't been to Hell for a while, so grab your nose plugs and away we'll go.] Leviathan was busy making sure that his hammock was extended to its full expansion when Berith opened the door to his office and stood there. Leviathan's two flunkeys peered into the office but were reluctant to touch Berith in case he disintegrated. "He barged by us," one of them said. "He doesn't have an appointment," the other added unnecessarily. "Have you fixed your portable pen yet?" "It doesn't need fixing, you idiot," Berith answered in kind remonstration. "You didn't put it together properly and won't it it." "No mermaids, no diamonds." Obviously, Leviathan was a master at creating slogans. This conversation didn't make sense to the flunkeys but nobody cared, not even the flunkeys. [The word flunkey comes from Scotland in the 1780s. It does not mean a person who failed a pop quiz. It refers to a footman or liveried servant. It's possible that the word was a variant of the word 'flanker' which referred to servants who were obliged to run alongside the coaches of their masters in case they needed anything en route. Generally, a flunkey was treated with derision. Other words of this nature are gofer, lackey, drudge, sycophant, toady, and younger brother.] "You're blocking the door," Leviathan chided. [This was quite the complaint for somebody who was big enough to block out the sun.] I hear you're having

financial difficulties, Berith. [This was a lucky guess. Leviathan was not connected to Hell's social gossip center. He wasn't connected to anything other than his hammock.] Berith turned on his left hoof and de-barged himself. # # # # # # # #

"I found monthly statements of revenues and expenses that appear to have been prepared for Hell," Paula announced. "They're earning a lot of money from that business. Twenty-thousand dollars a month, easy." "There's no safe in here. Have you seen them going to a bank?" "No, but they could still be banking. Perhaps they deposit it when they go to lunch." "Slick would be the one to collect the money when he has the final meeting with the client. The devils wouldn't let him keep the money." "We'll need to know this. I'll check the office drone from day 1. You start at yesterday and work backwards." # # # # # # # #

"Got it," Paula announced. "Boss devil went home with two brief cases on Friday." "Where were they hidden?" "The drone doesn't show the hiding place, just Boss Devil coming out of the office with two brief cases. Looks like they take their revenue to Hell every month." "That's a lot of money hiding in a closet." "They don't have a sign on the office door. I don't recall seeing any advertising

on the outside of this building. Nobody would know that valuables were here." "Another something that wasn't there that I didn't catch." "I missed it too, but we caught it now. I don't see how this could be important."

Back to the Table of Contents

Chapter 12

Winnie's boardroom, December 5th. Paula was speaking. "Some of you may be unaware that Karita and I have been investigating four Tucson devils who have been conning home owners with false reports of insect infestations. As part of that research, Cassie and I attended a meeting this morning in Hell where we expected to see four devils from Earth meet with their devil in charge. We are here to report what we saw and heard. I asked Winnie to invite Lillian, Joe-Joe, and Keely because the meeting in Hell revealed that the con job is much more than that. It was too dangerous for Karita to be in a crowded Hell, so I'll report on what Cassie and I saw. But first, here are Hell's players in this operation." "Four devils are operating as con men in Tucson. In alphabetical order, their names are: Dyffy, Hyffy, Spyffy, and Wyffy. The senior devil in Tucson is Wyffy. Physically, they appear to be young. When they are not working, they engage in young male adult activities, namely a lot of computer games and porn. They eat a lot of pizza and drink a lot of soda. Their mortal job is to sell fake insect eradication services. As part of their secretive devilian work, they use master keys to break into and search customer houses for valuables. Some months after the homes had been cleared of fake insects, they will rob those homes." "They themselves do not interact with customers. The person that they use for that task is named Slick. He is a 20-year old mortal with well-established skills as a burglar and conman. They trust him to receive payments from customers and bring them to their office. He is also in charge of three younger mortals who are learning the burglary trade. By ages, their names are Donkey, Lint-free, and Magic. They are 18 years old, 16, and 14. A 12-year old boy is ing the group this month. He is Slick's younger brother, Numnuts. These teenagers pretend to eradicate the non-existent insects, search the homes for valuables, and eventually rob them. They are allowed to keep the entire proceeds from those robberies." "A devil operating in Hell named Byffy is in charge of the operation. He was chairing the meeting which the four devils from Tucson attended this morning. He also is young. From the conversations we overhead in the meeting, we

learned that he was the previous head teenage burglar. He was promoted to Hell two years ago and is working on a plan to set up franchises of the insect business. The first expansion is planned for Tempe." "Slick will be promoted in a few months and will help Byffy with the expansion. Each of the other burglars will be promoted. As an aside, before the head burglar can be promoted, he has to recruit a new, very young burglar. Slick chose his younger brother and bullied him into the job." "You can see that this business is a burglar training program. It is very well organized and managed. Everything the burglars need is provided, including forms that have to be filled out when casing the houses. This could be getting confusing with all these players and their weird names. Perhaps now would be a good time for me to stop and give you the opportunity to ask about the players. Karita will answer." # # # # # # # #

"Joe-Joe?" "Karita, tell me again who smells of sulfur and who does not." "Byffy is a real devil, stationed in Hell and he smells of sulfur. He used to be a burglar but he graduated out of the training program and is planning the expansion to Tempe. The Tucson-based managers of the insect business are Dyffy, Hyffy, Spyffy, and Wyffy and they smell of sulfur. They are normal devils who are probably working in an apprentice devil capacity. In the bottom rung are the four teenage robbers, all of whom are mortals. "I got it." "The 12 year old age of the burglars is a direct violation of the Heaven/Hell treaty," Keely observed. "Is that why you wanted us here, Karita?" "Partly. We were more concerned about Slick and how he meets regularly with the four devils and gives them the revenue from the fake pest exterminations." "Does Slick know that they're devils?" Lillian asked. "If so, that's a violation of

the prime directive." "We don't know if he does or not. It would be hard to prove one way or the other. The main reason why we're here is because Byffy used to be a burglar and was promoted to a job in Hell. Slick is going to be promoted soon. He also will go to Hell to help run the expansion." "Did Byffy die?" Lillian asked. Winnie answered. "That's the issue. Without knowing his real name, I couldn't get very far at the sorting station. I did check Hell's records and couldn't find any reference to the four apprentice devils or to Byffy. As far as Hell is concerned, they don't exist! But this morning's meeting did give us an answer. Cassie will explain." "In this morning's meeting, Byffy described exactly how Slick would be given a devil's body at the security gates. This burglar training program is taking mortals directly from Earth into Hell." "That's a violation of the prime directive," Keely reminded everybody. "We take mortals directly from Earth into Heaven," Lillian countered. "The list of our subcontractors is getting very long. Our people work in Heaven and they are a violation of the prime directive." "Normally, a demon would get a devil's body in the Personnel Cavern," Keely advised. "The fact that Slick will get his body at the security gate suggests that mainstream Hell does not know about this operation. However, some devil in the security services would have to be part of this." "Why aren't the four devils meeting with customers?" Joe-Joe asked. "They have mortal bodies. Why delegate it to Slick?" "We believe that's because they don't trust each other," Paula answered. "Meetings would be in the client's home; only one of them would be needed." "That makes sense," Keely confirmed. "They've been in Hell for some time, first as tortured souls, then as demons, and now as apprentice devils. They've learned to mistrust everybody. Slick and Byffy can work together more easily. They knew each other as mortals."

"Which makes them more dangerous," Joe-Joe warned. "What are you going to do about Slick and Byffy, Winnie?" Lillian asked. "For now, our focus has to be on shutting down their Tucson operation and getting those four young burglars out of their clutches. Karita has a plan and it should work. I'll help her and Cassie tweak it a bit. We'll make sure that Slick doesn't go to Hell." "And Byffy?" Lillian pursued. Winnie answered. "Right now, we have no options. We can't take our concerns to Harry, because we're using mortals in our operations too. We can't act on Byffy directly without finding more about him first, which is hard to do when he has no official presence in Hell. If the Tucson business folds, perhaps that will put him out of business too. Our first job is to protect mortals. Karita and Paula are going to do that."

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Chapter 13

Mid December: Stu, are you having a good holiday? Japan is wonderful. Our visit to the Miyagi Prefecture triggered a memory for Momaka, but Bob didn't come out of hiding, so we think she's completely recovered. After a few minutes, she was able to wander on her own through the city's gardens while I did some history research on Miyagi. It's a very pretty area. How'd the meeting with Takeda go? Momaka is a wonderful negotiator. The Wilizy now have a signed contract with Takeda to supply the entire infrastructure you want. Plus, they'll install it, train the Cubans how to service it, and reply to requests for help for the next three years. The equipment is on a marine freighter right now, and they'll bring a small army of techies to install it countrywide. The freighter will probably arrive in a month. Whose name is on the contract? Takeda? Yes, but they're being paid secretly by our numbered company. Takeda will tell the Cubans that they are making their equipment available to them as a pilot test through which they will learn how to fill the needs of an entire country. They acknowledge that it's not their top line equipment. Their most recent technology would be too difficult for the Cubans to maintain. Takeda clears out some inventory and Cuba receives a power grid that works. Win-Win. Momaka will serve as their person. Is it within our budget? Easily. Thank her for her help.

She has really enjoyed this. What are you doing for the holidays? My boy friend and I will be in a land of sunny warm sand and waves. Where'd you find that? Arctic Ocean. I hear it's quite pleasant. Have a good time. Petey is finished with chicken jokes. He's doing lawyer jokes now. Ouch. How is his father the lawyer handling that? By the time we get home, I'm hoping he's onto politician jokes. They're funnier. # # # # # # # #

"What do you think of my plan?" Karita was the asker, Winnie was the askee, and Paula was the one sitting quietly with a huge smile on her face. "I like it. You'll need some officials to cooperate the way you want them to." "Paula will encourage their cooperation." "Have you picked the specific people to help you, or will you use the people on duty?" "People on duty. Given what I'm going to show them, I don't think there'll be a problem with anybody disputing what I have for them." "Any concerns?" "Flight risk." "Yes, I can see that could be likely. The legal consequences facing con men are not overly severe. You can solve the problem of flight risk and short sentences easily enough by provoking them into anger, which could lead to more serious

charges." "I can take care of that," Paula said. "When will you be ready?" "I could be ready in a week. But, I still have to create the ing materials. I also want to protect the people working in the key copy business. They don't deserve to be lumped together with these guys." "You can't say anything to them. That information could spread." "I know. I'll influence them to seek new opportunities." "All of this could take you some time. Why don't you delay until the first week of January? People will be back from their holidays. You want as large an audience as you can get." "That's less pressure. Thanks." "What are you doing for Christmas?" "Reese wants to go to Switzerland and meet up with the cadets." "Paula, what are you up to?" "Lylah asked me to them for Christmas Eve and Christmas day." "You must be happy." "If I smiled any more, my teeth would break." # # # # # # # #

Speaking of Christmas, the University of Arizona's Wildcats took their annual trip to Hawaii to participate in a tournament hosted by the University there. They won the tournament quite easily with the Hawaiian senior varsity team their only real competition. Maddy and Piper played the entire game against the Hawaiian junior varsity. Maddy pitched for half the game and caught for the second half.

Piper did the same thing but in reverse. They won that game but that was because the Wildcats' bats did a lot of damage. Both Piper and Maddy gave up runs against the older girls on the junior varsity. Maddy took her scanty bathing suit, which now was even tighter. Piper received a scanty bathing suit gift from the team and ed Maddy in strolling along the sand. They didn't dare go in the water lest the surf dislodge some critical pieces of flimsy fabric. Piper asked Maddy if she would to take her new bathing suit home with her in Maddy's luggage. They both agreed that it would be healthier for Piper's mom if she didn't see what Piper had been wearing in Hawaii. They didn't want her to have a stroke or something. Coincidentally, it was also better for Piper's health. # # # # # # # #

"Is this the office for Protect Your Home?" Eight eyeballs swiveled from looking at computer screens to looking at the partially opened office door and the face that was peeking in. They noticed an abundance of copper red hair framing an oval face. Two heads nodded. "I need your help." Eight eyes were now noticing the copper red lipstick. "This is a private office," Wyffy said. "Clients don't come here. We go to the clients." "I'll just come in and tell you what I need then," she said and opened the door fully. She paused in the open doorway to look around. Eight eyes scanned her body for hidden weapons. This is what they saw. Their guest was wearing six inch, black, stiletto heels. Men created stiletto heels to emphasize certain parts of a woman's body. A woman's toes would be on the ground; her heels would be six inches higher. In order to stand upright, a woman has to pull her shoulder back so that she is fully vertical. In doing that, she pushes her chest forward. That's the whole intent. Given her anatomical gifts, their guest must have had remarkable back muscles or an industrial strength bra.

Walking in stilettos was tricky. You can't just stride forward. Instead, the guest sashayed into the room and paused in front of Wyffy's desk. In a proper sashay, the woman will swing her hips from side to side. In certain stage performances, the sashay is accompanied by a set of drums and a reduction in the amount of clothing that the performer was wearing. Let's complete the description of the guest now. She wore a black, sleeveless, loose fitting top. The danger of loose fitting tops is that any change in posture, like leaning forward, would cause the top to gap open. This could be embarrassing for women who were too poor to buy underwear. The top may have been loose but her short black skirt made up for it by serving as a second skin. A wide red belt circled her waist. The guest must have had limited knowledge of the colors of the spectrum because everything she wore was either red or black, even her lips and fingernails. Coincidentally, red and black are Hell's favorite colors. "May I sit down?" All four devils rose and rearranged the middle of the office by pushing the meeting table to the side and setting up a loose circle of chairs in its place. Their knowledge of geometry must have been weak because it wasn't much of a circle. The chairs for the businessmen were in a semi-circle. She was all by herself across from the semi-circle. This meant that they were sitting opposite their guest where they could see her fully without a table blocking the view. She sat down primly. They sat down too. She smiled at them. "The place where I work has insects. I've tried to kill them, but I can't. I don't want to have strangers come to my work place. I need to trust that the exterminators won't tell others where I work. Can I trust you to be discrete?" "Why are you worried about strangers visiting you work place?" Wyffy asked. "I'm an artiste. Some old fuddy-duddies don't appreciate my art. They might do things to stop me. If I couldn't practice my art, I would starve." "You paint pictures?" Hyffy asked. "No. I'm a performance artist. I work on a small stage with other selected artists. My staff records the performance and distributes the videos. I am very popular with young people."

"So, you act in a play in a theatre?" Dyffy asked. "No, I'm way more active than just standing on a stage. I hardly ever stand. Think of what I do as an athletic performance." "Like soccer?" Hyffy again. "More like gymnastics," she said. Then she winked. Three heads nodded. "Horizontal gymnastics," she said to Hyffy who finally got it. "I'll be able to help you," Wyffy volunteered. "What kind of insects?" "I don't know much about insects. I found them eating some old wood." "Those are termites," Spyffy diagnosed. "Those are hard to kill. I'll help you too." "Me two." "Me two." "You're being so generous with your time. Can you give me an idea of how much I'll have to pay?" Wyffy named a figure. "Oh," she said in a disappointed voice. "Well, thanks for your time." She bent forward in a motion that would allow her to push herself up off her chair. "Wait!" She froze. Then she bent forward a little more so that she could scratch an itch on her ankle. "What am I waiting for?" [Are you enjoying yourself, Paula?] [Oh, yeah.]

"Perhaps we could work something out." Wyffy said. Paula resumed her position sitting straight up in the chair. Eight eyelids were now free to blink. "I have an idea," she said and inhaled deeply to pique their interest. "I'm always looking for new artists to me in my performances. What if you killed my termites for free and, in exchange, I added one of you to my cast?" Four Adam's apples bobbed as four mouths attempted to swallow. "Pick me." "Pick me." "Pick me." "Pick me." "I couldn't possibly add all four of you." "How will you pick?" "My co-stars have to be good looking and athletic. You need to have good physiques. Take off your jackets and shirts so that I can see your bodies. .... "I can't pick. Shoes, socks and tros off." ... "I still can't pick. All of your bodies look good. I'll need each of you to stand next to me. You can't be too tall or too short. Wyffy, you're first." Wyffy came forward. "Stand here." ... "Turn slightly and face me."

... "I'm going to put my right arm around your waist. Do you mind if I touch you?" "No," he croaked." "We have to do something with your right hand. You can't have it hanging down like that." She picked up his hand and guided it to a resting place. Four bodies quivered. "Now, lean over and kiss me." [Action and ... stop camera.] "Spyffy, your turn." [Action and ... stop camera.] ... "Hyffy, your turn." [Action and ... stop camera.] ... "Dyffy, your turn." [Action and ... stop camera.] [Winnie, I'm throwing this body into a dumpster and I'm never using it again.] ... "Wow, that was so exciting. All four of you have a perfect body, and you are amazing kissers. Let's plan for one of you to come to my theatre and kill the termites in the second week of January. When they're gone, we'll start filming. It's going to be a best seller. I can feel it." "Who's going to be your co-star?" Wyffy asked.

"I can't choose. You guys will have to work it out. I'll see you in a couple of weeks." [Huh. I wonder how devils would react to this announcement. They'd probably discuss it among themselves and arrive at a reasonable decision that satisfied everybody. Or not.]

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Chapter 14

How Low Can You Go?

by Fanny Fandigity

Sometimes, I have to shake my head. "Fanny," you ask. "Why do you have to shake your head?" I have to shake my head at the depravity that some people will go to in order to make money. Take, for example, the four executives of the Protect Your Home business in Tucson, Arizona. This company helps homeowners by fumigating their houses when they have infestations of silver fish, cockroaches, or termites. This business is very well known in Tucson since everybody has been very happy with their services, which can extend to yearly inspections to ensure the insects don't come back. And, they never do! Mind you, those services can be expensive. Still, the insects will never come back. There's one teeny, teeny problem with this business and its good reputation. There never were any insect infestations in the first place. It's easy to make nasty insects disappear when they were never in the house to begin with. Protect Your Home is run by four young man who are con artists and I have proof. Watch this video clip below. # # # # # # # #

With the help from my very good tech team, you have seen four men dressed in business suits discussing what they were going to do that week with an employee whose face I have blocked. You have heard them discussing their entire business model, which goes like this: (1) Break into a house and leave

signs of dead insects. (2) When the homeowner calls for help, send a representative to perform a physical inspection that always reveals that the insects have taken over the house. (3) Sell them a solution to all their problems for now and forever. (4) Send two employees in full Hazmat suits to fumigate the house. , they have nothing to fumigate. (5) Train the employees to wander around the house taking notes of what valuables the owners have and where they can be found. (6) Wait at least a month and then send the same employees to the house, which they will forcefully enter and rob. Here's the scary part for all of you homeowners who believe that you are safe after you've locked your doors and gone to bed. The owners of Protect Your Home have a set of master keys that will unlock any conventional lock in Tucson. That's how they got into homes to plant the dead insects. Key manufacturers will only make sets of master keys available to authorized key copiers. Guess what? These four conmen also owned a high profile key copy business. Their booths were everywhere in Tucson. They were good community leaders. They were above reproach. I must emphasize: The people who work in the key copy business had nothing to do with the four conmen. They didn't know that the conmen were using their master keys to rob Tucson's homeowners. They were conned, just like you. Here's the filthy part of Protect Your Home. As mentioned, they trained young male teenagers to smash and grab. If anything went wrong, the boys would be the only ones caught. The training starts with boys as young as 12 years old. Here's a video clip of a boy being trained to rob a house that they have targeted but not robbed yet. I have obscured the boy's face and voice. I have also obscured features of the house that might reveal the house owners. # # # # # # # #

From that video clip, you can see that this young boy did not want to be in that house. He was bullied into it. If he were caught, his life would have been ruined. The four executives believed that they could not be prosecuted. They were wrong about that. Last week, I took all my evidence including video clips to the Tucson Police Department. In response, they formed a special unit that would my

accusations and deal with these con men. The verification went very quickly. As you've seen, my video clips were compelling evidence. Yesterday, Sunday morning, the special unit brought all of the young robbers in for questioning. The robbers confessed to all of what you've seen and added details of their own, including how young they were when they started and how they were pressured to be part of the organization. Naturally, parents were there. What happens to the robbers next will be up to the Tucson Police Department. I can tell you that the boys were released to their parents and are now confined at home. I have heard rumors that the older robbers will be charged because they could have left the organization at any time. Tucson police were prepared to arrest the four executives Monday morning at their office. Somebody must have tipped them off because their office and their house were empty when the police arrived. In an effort to help the police track these men down, I am including some video clips from my investigation. These clips show how the executives responded to a young woman's plea for fumigation help. Termites were consuming part of the building where she worked and she was in danger of losing her livelihood. She couldn't afford to pay them the fee they required. In this clip, you'll see the faces and bodies of the executives clearly. Given the intimate nature of how they are holding the woman and how the men are dressed, you will see how these executives planned to take advantage of her desperation. Only bits and pieces of her clothing and body can be seen, so I am comfortable releasing the images to the public in the hopes that you can help the Tucson police track them down. If you see these men in Tucson, please notify the police department immediately. So, now you see how low some people can go in the pursuit of money. They say that money is the root of all evil, and I think that may be true. Certainly, those four executives would qualify as evil. A quick bit of advice to Tucson homeowners. The locks that you have on your homes are archaic. They are very old technology. Keyless lock systems do exist. # # # # # # # #

Narrator: I should tie up some loose ends to Karita' and Paula's operation. Paula had jumped at the chance of being a sex object; perhaps because of Winnie's observation that she dressed like an old fuddy-duddy. Whatever the reason, the 'sting' worked. Winnie used a male voice to warn the executives that the Tucson police were investigating them. The devils fled and took refuge in Hell. Fanny's exposé came the next day along with pictures of the devils obviously intent on having sex with a mortal. From the outset, Karita's operational plan had been to use a Fanny article to galvanize the police. That's why she was filming as much as she could. She couldn't use the films in a formal trial, but there was enough evidence in the films to prompt the police to open up an investigation in which they would ultimately determine that the executives had been breaking laws. Paula was prepared to send mind messages to some of the police to get them moving. That was not necessary. Karita's concern that the devils would flee was real, but she didn't know what to do about that. Winnie's first suggestion was to provoke the executives into committing more serious crimes, like assaulting a policeman. Later, she asked herself Why should Arizona have to imprison four devils? Why shouldn't Hell provide the consequences? A quick reminder: The Heaven/Hell treaty had two major clauses. One prohibited devils from revealing to mortals that Hell existed. Hell had already broken that law with Blyffy, who used to be a teen-age burglar and advanced directly to being a devil living in Hell. Slick also knew about Hell. The other major clause was the ban on devils having sex with mortals. The consequences for breaking either of those laws were severe. Senior devils in Hell would be very sensitive to any allegations that either of these treaty obligations had been breached. Fanny's public exposé created a lot of attention that was not limited to mortals. Devils in Arizona who knew about the exterminators reported to their superiors that visible evidence was circulating throughout Arizona that four young devils were in a coerced sexual relationship with a mortal. Loud alarms sounded in increasing higher hornocratic offices.

This flurry was prompted by the knowledge that if devils in the field had read the exposé, then angels in the field would have also. A simple angelic visit to the business' offices would reveal the executives' hellish origins. This would prompt further angelic investigations that surely would reach higher halocratic officers. It was only a matter of time before Harry would be asked to investigate. That investigation would lead to a truth ray interrogation. Those who knew that two young mortals had become devils without the benefit of death began to panic. The SSS was instructed to find the four idiots and bring them into a secure location in a deep dark cavern. Finding them was remarkably easy. They were in Hell and blissfully unaware that they had provoked a possible Heaven-Hell conflagration that would not go well for Hell if Harry investigated. The SSS interviewed the four devils and then expanded their investigations to include any devils who had knowledge of the use of mortals inside Hell. They advised Ponzi that a good lawyer might be able to argue that the sexual encounters were consensual and minor, but he'd never be able to explain Byffy's presence in Hell. Satan decided to be proactive. Heaven did investigate and did determine that the four men in Fanny's exposé were devils. Brunhilda asked Harry to investigate. Harry summoned Ponzi and asked him to make the four devils available for questioning. Ponzi replied that Satan had already investigated and found that these four devils had violated the treaty. They had been punished and were no longer available for questioning. Hell regretted that they had violated the treaty, but that violation was a function of their stupidity and was not intentional. Nothing was ever said about Byffy. He wasn't available either. # # # # # # # #

Karita's subliminal thought messages did stimulate the staff of the lock copy business to start stocking and selling keyless locks. Being the first in Tucson to do that, and having a very positive presence in the community already, they were able to grow their new business rapidly. They used the same business model of recognizing volunteers, sponsoring sports teams paying decent wages, and having small kiosks throughout the city. Their success with that plan plus a

heavy demand for keyless locks led to other branch offices opening across the state. One excerpt from Paula's sex tape made it back to Heaven. It was the one of Paula sashaying into the office in her stilettos and top-heavy body. Winnie gave it to her as a grandmother's day gift. Nobody knows where Paula stored it. The team does know that she watches it, because every now and then, she unconsciously sashays into a meeting with a big smile on her face.

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Chapter 15

It's now time to revisit our two favorite curmudgeon-devils. Awarding them curmudgeon status signifies that these devils were old, cranky, and napdependent. This comes with age and it doesn't matter whether that aging happens to mortals or to devils, elevation to the state of curmudgeonhood is a definite possibility for males as they age. The last time we saw Leviathan and Berith, they were engaged in a stare-down. Berith was trying to intimidate Leviathan into climbing into his swimming trunks, slithering down to Earth and picking up a thousand or so diamonds from the take out window. Leviathan was still sulking about his mermaidian lunch being filched before he could eat it. He had blamed Toadstool for not having a good enough prison. Subsequently, Toadstool (Berith) had blinked at the mere mention of financial difficulties and had taken his frail body back to his comfy cave where he could eat his pre-chewed food in secrecy. You may be wondering about the references to toadstools and pre-chewed food. As Leviathan had aged, he was faced with an environment where his body did not receive evil hormones from tortures on Earth. With no wooden ships available to squeeze out sailors, his body had ballooned. That balloon was not muscle; it was best described as blubber-guts: blubber being the fat that keeps large seaborne mammals warm, and guts being where Leviathan was storing the blubber. Essentially, he was one giant digestive system consisting of stomach and intestines. The less that he tortured, the more his digestive system expanded. Blubber-Guts was Toadstool's nickname for him. It wasn't an affectionate nickname. Toadstool had an entirely different reaction to his own entry into old age. You know already that Blubber-Guts had earned his way into inner pentagram status by the fear that he provoked. Toadstool had earned his way into inner pentagram status by the number of deaths that he had caused. Toadstool will probably go down in Hell's history as the most murderous devil ever. You may

wonder how he had managed that. The answer is that Toadstool had earned his horns through warfare. One might classify wars into two broad types. One kind starts with the head of a country who looks at the neighboring country and says to himself: They have something I want. I think I'll take it, kill all the men and enslave all the women. Think of this as a war prompted by greed for power, wealth, reputation, and growth through annexation and slavery. This was not Toadstool's type of war. Another devil in Hell was responsible for that kind of warfare. Toadstool was the devil who started and prolonged wars centered on religion. There's an important distinction to make here. Religion as a concept or way of life is a good thing. It can lift people up. It can provide consolation, goals to strive for, and guidelines to live by. A war centered on religion has little to do with religion. It starts with a leader of some kind, who looks at his neighbor and says: Those people believe in another god. That god is bad. I should conquer them to demonstrate how their religion is wrong. Or, their religion is infringing on my religion. We must fight them to show them we have the best religion. Or, there can be only one religion: Ours. Keep in mind that the above is a broad description. It's not a condemnation of religion. It's a recognition that many people use religion as a pretext to get more power, wealth, land, etc. A good example would be the Crusades circa the 11th century when Muslims and Christian fought over who would control land that both asserted belonged to their religion. Wars based on religion appeared regularly up to and including the 21st century. Wars could even be fought by different divisions within a religion. Protestants versus Catholics in Ireland for example. The beautiful thing about religion-based warfare, from Toadstool's viewpoint, was these kinds of wars were very hard to stop because they were based on core belief systems. Emotions got very high. Logic and reason could not succeed in preventing wars in such circumstances. At the height of his kill total in the 20th century, Toadstool stood head and shoulders above all other devils, with the exception of Satan. I mean that literally. Toadstool was fourteen feet tall and his horns added another foot. And

then, Toadstool's world fell apart. This collapse had nothing to do with reason decreeing that perhaps we shouldn't be killing people of other religions, especially because our religion disapproves of killing people. What happened was completely unexpected, but entirely predictable. A force of nature had intervened. Climate change had arrived. When you are struggling to find a way to eat and drink, attending religious ceremonies is not high on your priority list. Consequently, religious services disappeared around the world. It didn't matter how hard Toadstool worked to make one religion mad at the other, mortals ignored him. As the wars based on religion abruptly disappeared, so did Toadstool's torture hormones. He started to shrink. By the end of the 21st century, Toadstool was a wizened old devil-geezer. Not only was he curmudgeony, he was also forgetful, obstinate, and growly. He refused to it that he was hard of hearing; he blamed other for muttering instead of speaking clearly. He walked slowly and in small steps so that he wouldn't fall. A broken hip could be an afterlife-threatening event. People who met him in the sewers were afraid to touch him in case he disintegrated in front of their eyes, as you saw with Blubber-gut's flunkeys. His horns, always a measure of a devil's evil in Hell, had shrunk to the point where they looked like toadstools. As horns were a sign of your virility in Hell, you wouldn't want toadstools on your head. Hence, Blubber-Guts' insulting nickname. Now, as to the reference to pre-chewed food: Toadstool's teeth were rotting and falling out. Rumours were circulating that he was looking for down-on-their-luck devils to chew his food for him. That wasn't true. But he had been secretly looking for something. That something was a financial backer. # # # # # # # #

Toadstool's wizened old body may have been at risk of disintegration, but he still had a brain. That brain had produced an idea. An idea for a new religion. It shouldn't surprise you to find out that Toadstool would be thinking of religions as a source of his re-birth. None of the good religions had been up to the task of staying alive and vibrant in

a world swept apart by climate change. But, one religion could prosper in hard times. This religion could never be defeated by something like rising waters or cancer cells. On Earth, there would always be a hunger for money and for good reason. Mortals had always idolized money and its acquisition. Toadstool's reasoning went like this. The quest for money was insatiable. Why not make money into a religion? Toadstool would be the God of money. The addiction for money knew no bounds and could provoke the most heinous of crimes. Toadstool thought about that word. In Hell, heinous is an adjective that is revered. He noticed the sound of the word was remarkably similar to what monarchs on Earth were called. Your Highness. He now knew what he'd have his adherents call him. Your Heinous. To Toadstool, this focus on money as a religion sounded like an unending source of tormentts. The underlying pressures for acquisition of more money were already present. He just needed a temple in which the adherents could gather. There, they could pray to the God of Money for more money. Toadstool's rule for mortals wanting to enter his temple would be: If you don't pray, you can't stay. Adherents would have to pay to enter the temple. Certain services within the religion, like official recognitions of wealth accumulations, would cost them. Since humans liked birth certificates and paid for them, why wouldn't they want wealth certificates and pay for those? The temple could keep records of the wealth of all adherents. Those who were at the bottom of the list could be kicked out of the religion as not worthy, meaning they were too poor. That threat would reinvigorate their desire for wealth. No wealthy person would ever be able to accept the label of being poor. That was like being labeled a loser. Toadstool even had the design of his first temple roughed out. It would be in the former United States and would be shaped like a giant dollar sign. In England, temples would take the form of a giant pound sign. And so on. As fees rolled in from all adherents praying to the God of Money, those fees would provide the funding for worldwide expansion. For the first time ever, Earth would have only one religion: a religion that people already believed in. Money. His Heinous just had to find the wealth that would allow him to build his first temple. And that's where the diamonds came in. Back to the Table of Contents

Chapter 16

Leviathan's flunkeys were depositing him into the hammock in his office when Toadstool walked through the open door. "Are you ready to collect my diamonds?" he asked. "Are you ready to pen up my mermaids properly?" The signs of an detente seemed remote. Clearly, neither party was willing to budge. Toadstool opened up a new negotiation strategy by turning to the flunkeys and saying: "Whatever he's paying you, I'll pay you double if you come with me now." Whatever happened to loyalty? # # # # # # # #

A week later, Toadstool returned to Blubber-Guts' office with a stranger in tow. Toadstool opened the door to find Blubber-Guts half in and half out of the hammock. Apparently, he had been trying to ooze out of his hammock, but a foot had been caught up in the ropes holding the hammock off the ground. He wasn't strong enough to pull himself up into the hammock to extricate his foot. Nor could he go any further forward. He was hanging by a foot, his head and horns resting on the bubble wrap of the floor, and his belly forming a giant anchor keeping him immobile. "Help me," Blubber-Guts pleaded. The odds of Blubber-Guts trying and failing to leave his hammock must have been compelling because Toadstool had come prepared. "This is a reporter from the National Sinquisitor," he announced. Turning to the reporter, he said. "Here's what I'm seeing for your front page story tomorrow. You have a big picture of Blubber-Guts hanging by his foot, half in

and half out of the hammock. Your headline says: Inner pentagram devil is too weak to get out of bed and begs for help." Sniffing, he added. "You can start the story with this: In his dotage, the former scourge of the seven seas soiled his scales as he floundered like a giant guppy caught in a net." The reporter started taking pictures including some close ups. "We should negotiate. Send the reporter out." Toadstool pointed his hand to the door and the reporter left and closed the door behind him. "I'll collect our diamonds first," Blubber-Guts offered. "You'll collect MY diamonds first. All of them are mine. You can eat whatever mermaids you can catch afterwards." "Deal, but no story." "I'll keep the pictures he took in case you don't fulfill your part of the deal." # # # # # # # #

Determining how they would share, or not share in this case, was one thing. Figuring out how to collect the diamonds was another. The serpent's lack of hands was a definite limitation. "Tell me again. What kind of seabed are they lying in?" Toadstool asked. "They're lying at the bottom of several trenches." "Wide enough for your serpent body to get in?" "Yes." "How deep are the trenches?"

"Very deep. Too deep for the Gecko body." "Can you swallow the diamonds and we'll collect them later?" "They're like sharp rocks. They'd rip my innards up." "As your body is slithering across the diamond at the bottom of the trench, your head would be above the diamonds, right? "Yes." "We could hang a container from your head and if you lowered your head, the container would be on the diamonds. If you slithered forward, would that push the diamonds into the container?" "It could if the container were on its side and if it had a large firm opening. That won't happen if the container is hanging from my head." "What about this? You carry a container attached to your teeth to the trench. You put the container down and unhook it from your teeth. You adjust the container so that it's lying on its side. You use your snout to push the diamonds into the container. When it's full, you hook the container onto your teeth and away you go." "The container has to be always open. Also, the container can't move when I push the diamonds into it. It has to be anchored in place somehow." "Could you curl your tail around behind the container?" "Yes. I'm very flexible that way. How will you keep the container open?" "We'll use a cloth bag with a thick wire sewn into the top. We'll also use the wire to keep the handles upright." "Where would you get that done?" "The local Cave Depot will have the bags and wire." "I want a big bag. I've seen lot of diamonds in those trenches." # # # # # # # #

It took Berith a day to create the bag. Next, they had to determine how the two of them would travel to a PUS station near an ocean and back again without other devils noticing an open bag full of diamonds. This meant that the PUS car would have to be on a line that had been closed. San Francisco, the City by the Bay, was mostly underwater and PUS wasn't running any cars to underwater cities. That would work. After some monetary persuasion, PUS agreed to run a car to the City Under the Bay and leave it there temporarily. That would give them a private place where they could repackage the diamonds for smuggling into Hell. Toadstool was privately considering the option of leaving the diamonds there, but Blubber-Guts would have to be silenced. This raised a vital question: How does one kill a sea serpent? # # # # # # # #

"How does one kill a sea serpent?" Winnie asked Murray. They were in Winnie's boardroom. Merly was also present. Murray had asked for Shields to come too because she had saved them from Leviathan and he thought she should be there at the end. Shields agreed to find the time. "We've never considered killing Leviathan," Murray itted. "He's easy enough to outswim." "Whatever you do, I think all of the mermaids will want to be involved," Merly added. "He killed Merable. He has to pay for that." "Do you want him to have a trial?" "What's a trial?" "So, no trial then." Winnie had been considering the Nemeses but had been reluctant to include them. The fewer people who knew that somebody from Heaven was planning to kill an inner pentagram devil, the better. She had already discarded the idea of involving the Cops. If she went to them, Hell would argue that mermaids were fish, so what's the big deal about killing and eating them?

Winnie turned to Murray. "What's underneath the scales?" "Blubber, which is whale fat. A long time ago, whales were killed for their blubber, which could be cooked down to lamp oil. Whales had to come to the surface when they swam and that made them vulnerable to harpoons. Leviathan doesn't come to the surface. He slithers along the ocean floor." "Can we kill him down there, Shields?" "Not likely." "Even if we ambushed him?" "Still not likely. Joe-Joe confirmed that we don't have the weaponry. That hasn't changed." "And on land?" "He'd be vulnerable but he has no reason to come on land. Plus, he'd still have the huge body." "We'd have to cut him down to size," Winnie mused. "Out of the water, Merly's robe could work." "Out of the question," Murray ruled. "One bite, even one nip, even a blow from his tail would kill her. We can't put our queen into that kind of jeopardy." "Shields, can you take him on land?" "It's dangerous because of what Murray said. I can't use my hand-to-hand skills at all." ... "Winnie, don't even think about that. If I can't take him, then neither can you." "Well, this has been fun. Thanks for coming. At least we have some more time to think about this. Leviathan hasn't budged from Hell." There has to be a way.

Back to the Table of Contents

Chapter 17

Winnie didn't have much time to devise a plan to kill a sea serpent. Blubber-Guts left Hell one day later, on Wednesday, January 11. She didn't know that Toadstool had left with him and was sitting in an empty PUS car in San Francisco. Murray, Leviathan is on the move. He's entering the water in San Francisco Bay now. He has a bag of some kind hanging from his snout. I have no idea why he has that bag. I'll follow him in the air. I'm heading northwest. How many mermaids are nearby? Merly and I can get to you with portals. We have five in the Pacific Ocean. I'll send instructions to them as soon as I reach San Francisco. # # # # # # # #

He appears to be on course to the Juan de Fuca Ridge area. (Winnie) Winnie, that's where William has been mining. (Merly) He packed all that equipment away for safekeeping. (Winnie) William had trenches full of diamonds from his air scrubbing equipment in that area. (Merly) That explains the container. How many mermaids are with you and where are you, Murray? (Winnie) We are seven and we're ten or twenty seconds behind him. (Murray) Do you have anything sharp on you? (Winnie) We don't have pockets. (Merly) Can you find anything sharp? Shells, for example. (Winnie)

I smell some islands. There'll be shells. I know what you're thinking. (Merly) Be safe. (Winnie) # # # # # # # #

"You brought me no diamonds whatsoever? Why not?" "Mermaids swarmed me when I was coming back. They had sharp shells and were going after my eyes. I had to fight them off. One of them must have sliced the bag open. I noticed it was empty after they left me." "Their nest must be nearby. They sliced the bag open to see what was inside. You'll need a better bag next time." "What about my eyes?" "You can wear a motorcycle helmet." "It won't fit on my head." "We'll take out the visor and strap it to your head." "Where will you get all of this?" "Abandoned stores in San Francisco. I have plenty of time to find what I need. You'll go mining again tomorrow morning." # # # # # # # #

While Toadstool was shopping underwater in San Francisco, Winnie was in the kitchenware section of the WC&D store in Calgary. Cutlery was too small and not sharp enough. Carving knives were not good enough either. She needed something that could rip through whatever bag Leviathan brought with him next time. It had to be long too. An image of something sharp and pointy flashed through her memory.

Mac, do you still have that little sword of yours? Pea Sticker? That's the one. Can I borrow it? Later, Pea Sticker's cousin ed Mac's Pea Sticker. Even later, Winnie had this conversation. Murray, how would you escape from Leviathan if he were chasing you? I'd swim faster. He's very slow. What if he were able to keep up with you? I'd take him up to the surface where I could hydroplane. Hydroplane? When mermaids swim fast, we can soar out of the water in long arcs. When you break through the resistance of the water, you are partly swimming and partly flying. Leviathan can't reach that kind of speed. How do you swim fast? I move my tail up and down rapidly. Dolphins do this. It's dangerous for them though. If they hydroplane in shallow water, they could beach themselves on land. That would be it for them. A mermaid would simply change to her mortal body and walk out of danger. Are there any deserted islands on the way back to San Francisco where hydroplaning would be dangerous for dolphins? Several. Can you show me one? Later, Winnie portalled to Heaven, rummaged through some military stores, and brought a box of supplies to the island. She hid the box in the shade under a palm tree. She also hid Pea Sticker and its cousin.

# # # # # # # #

Thursday. Murray, he's on his way. It looks like he has a stronger cloth bag this time. The whole family is here. We're waiting for you by the island. Talk to you soon. # # # # # # # #

"What is this?" "It's called a fanny pack. It wraps around your waist and it has a zippered pocket where you can store things. All of you should have a pocket to store things. I'll fit you out with fanny packs after we're done with Leviathan." "What's this?" "It called a scabbard. It will hang from your fanny pack and it is built to hold this mini sword. Be careful. It's very sharp at the end. It should easily pierce the bag that Leviathan is carrying." "Do we swarm him as before with the shells?" "Yes. Hit him early. Don't use the whole family." "Is today the day?" "No. I want him to be desperate. Tomorrow will be the day. The whole family will be involved." "Shields too?" "If you wish."

"She's part of the family." # # # # # # # #

"Again?!" "They went after my mouth this time. I was fighting them off and somebody cut the bag again. I thought you said that nothing could get through that bag." "What did they use?" "All I could see was mermaids." "I'll have a surprise for them tomorrow."

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Chapter 18

Friday the 13th, January 2096. Did Blubber-Guts believe in bad luck on Fridays the 13th? We don't know if he did or not. Probably not. Hell didn't use calendars all that much. He should have believed in it. He was scheduled to die today. Did Winnie believe that certain Fridays could be unlucky? We don't know that either. We do know that these Fridays had accumulated enough of a reputation for bad luck that some people made lists of what not to do on Friday the 13th. If you broke these rules, bad luck was sure to follow. Here's one such list from a long time ago. 1) Do not walk under a ladder. 2) Do not let a black cat cross your path. 3) Do not break a mirror. 4) Do not open an umbrella indoors. 5) Do not step on a sidewalk crack. 6) Do not get out of bed on the wrong side. 7) Do not spill salt. 8) Do not step on a grave. 9) Do not break your shoelace. 10) Do not yawn without covering your mouth. The rules didn't say anything about not swimming long distances, not stealing diamonds, and not letting mermaids cross your path. They should have. Winnie wasn't thinking about Friday the 13th at all. She was reasonably confident that the day would go well. At least for the mermaids; not so well for sea serpents. Mind you, she was not going to bring the wrath of the God of Random Events on her head by asking, What could possibly go wrong? As she went through her mental checklist, everything was looking good. Is an emergency supply kit on the island? Check. Are weapons present and working? Check. Is Leviathan's tracking device still working? Check. Will Leviathan die because he killed a mermaid? Check. Will Leviathan's body disappear and not be found? Check.

Winnie had designed the operation so that, if discovered, it would not break any interplanetary norms. This was simply a case of a species of fish killing another species of fish. This was nature taking care of nature's business. If one were to raise a ruckus about mermaids killing a sea serpent and take such a ruckus to the Cops of Cosmos, would sharks then be expected to become vegetarian? Besides, who in Hell would know? Leviathan's body had disappeared in Earth's waters. No devil could look for the body or find any evidence of its demise. Devils can't swim. It's entirely possible that an elderly sea serpent had gone for one last swim and died of blubber failure or some other such disease of the aged. Who would notice that he wasn't in Hell? Who would care? From what Winnie had learned, Leviathan was long past his prime and had been considered surplus to needs and forgotten. His two flunkies would have accompanied him to San Francisco to help him with the diamond carrier. When he didn't return, would they raise a ruckus, or would they steal everything they could from Leviathan's cave and office and then disappear? The answer was obvious. Mind you, my readers know that Winnie's optimistic thought that Leviathan was getting help from flunkies was wrong. That was understandable. Winnie's team had been cut to the bone. Normally, she would have put afterliving eyes on her target, but Paula couldn't handle the full duties, so she went to another way of having eyes. Her reasonable assumption that it was highly dangerous to go inside the office or cave of an inner pentagram devil was entirely appropriate too. Such devils had powers that required angelic spies to give them a wide berth. She didn't realize how un-powerful Leviathan had become. And with that caution, how could she know that another inner pentagram devil was in San Francisco and was desperate for Leviathan to return with oodles and oodles of diamonds? So, perhaps Friday the 13th would be an unlucky day for her after all. # # # # # # # #

Winnie was meeting with Murray on the island. Twenty other mermaids were swimming in the waters on the far side of the island where they were unlikely to be detected by their smell. They were also observing radio silence. Winnie

started the report on what a certain dolphin had seen in San Francisco Bay. "Leviathan has given up on the cloth bag and will be putting the diamonds into a largish metal container. I couldn't tell how heavy it was. An attack close to the island will not only be a surprise but it will shorten your swim. Do you know how deep he'll be?" "He'll be close to the ocean floor, but not on it. I'll come at him from below and behind. Will the small sword work?" "It should. The blade is sharp and he's using thick canvas straps around his neck to carry the container." "With the metal container hanging from his neck, the straps will be in the open and easy to cut. Do I have to cut both straps or only one?" "Just one. In theory, when you cut one, you'll have time to sheath the sword and wait for the container to fall into your hands. All you have to do then is escape." "I'll be slowed down by the weight of the container, but he's very slow. I should be able to stay in front of him." "Carry this in your mouth and use it if you need to. The point is sharp." "I'll swim gradually up to sea level. The container will limit how much I can hydroplane." "One thrust into the air is enough. Merly will be there waiting." # # # # # # # #

The new metal container that Toadstool had produced for inspection had a lid and two handles on the sides. He showed Blubber-Guts how one end of a strap could be fastened to one handle. The strap would wind around his neck and attach to the other handle. They tested it in water and adjusted the strap so that the container didn't drag on the seabed. Blubber-Guts was planning to hug the bottom of the ocean where the mermaids might not be able to reach, so that was a consideration.

When Blubber-Guts reached the diamond trenches, he found that the thick walls to the metal container were a benefit, even though they meant less capacity for diamonds. Blubber-Guts just set the container on the diamonds with the lid open. It was so heavy that it wouldn't be going anywhere. He picked up a mouthful of diamonds and dribbled them into the box. Six mouthfuls did the trick. Hugging the ocean floor on the way back to San Francisco also did the trick. No mermaids appeared. Blubber-Guts was making good progress and calculating how many round trips he would need to make. He'd be busy for weeks if he told Toadstool that this box had hardly made a dent in the diamonds in one trench. Or, he could tell Toadstool that the trench had only a shallow covering of diamonds and he could empty all the trenches in two days. This second option was very appealing. How would Toadstool know that he was lying? Toadstool would still receive lots of diamonds for himself, but afterwards, Blubber-Guts would have the metal box. He could come back later and collect the rest of the diamonds. That would serve Toadstool right for trying to cut him out of the diamonds that Blubber-Guts had discovered on his own and without any help from the scrawny old geezer. Besides, Toadstool's mermaid pen hadn't worked. Blubber-Guts was working through the lies he would have to tell when he noticed that there was no heavy weight on the end of his straps. He looked down to see a mermaid tugging on the metal box that was now stuck in the seabed. He lunged at the mermaid with his head and almost connected with his teeth. That scared the mermaid who managed to extract the box. He had to hold it in two hands, but managed to escape. I have the box. The timing on the pickup was off. He's right behind me. When he had a reason to, Blubber-Guts could go from slithering to scurrying. ... I'm bleeding. He's closing. Now, he's lunging at my tail. The smell of blood in the water is a strong stimulus for flesh eating marine behemoths like sharks and serpents. Blubber-Guts was indeed lunging and snapping at the diamond-thieving mermaid who was now flapping his tail in giant powerful arcs, presumably to make his tail a moving target. Blubber-Guts broke the surface to see the mermaid fly out of the water and land on a sandy beach. It looked like he had fallen on the box of diamonds when he landed.

The mermaid looked back and saw Leviathan coiled in the surf. He had a motorcycle helmet on head with a visor covering his eyes. He could have been a creature from space. Turning, the mermaid ignored the box and tried to pull himself through the sand with his hands. Leviathan saw the desperation in the mermaid's eyes. He was using both of his hands to try to pull himself to the water that was on the other side of this spit of sand. The sand was too soft to give him traction. His tail wasn't moving. Broken back? The diamonds could wait. Snakes can slither very well on loose sand. Leviathan bent his body into a curvy S-shape and ed those curves down its body. His scales helped to give him traction. Then he bent his upper body in the opposite direction and ed those curves down its body. Lunch was on the table. The mermaid looked back to see the serpent fully out of the water and approaching the sand where he had beached himself. He looked around wildly for help. He held out a hand and pointed. Blubber-Guts looked at where he was pointing. A human female was standing in the sand. She was wearing some kind of shiny clothes and she had a white disc in her hands. "We've been waiting for you, Leviathan," she said. She clicked something on the top of the disc and spun it towards him. Blubber-Guts was unconscious before the stassis charger hit the sand. Merly walked up to his body and removed his helmet and face shield. No motorcycles were allowed on this island. # # # # # # # #

In the immediate aftermath of Murray's beaching and Merly's Frisbee throwing contest, all of the other mermaids had come out of hiding and were sitting in a giant circle around the comatose body of a giant serpent. Shields had also come out of hiding and was hustling Murray to a first aid station that she had set up. The blood had come from a tiny pinprick that he had made in his forearm with the small knife that Winnie had given him, which he had carried in his mouth. For such a minor injury, Shields took a long time to bring him back to the circle. She must have had trouble finding a Band-Aid small enough to do the job.

When everybody who wasn't unconscious was ready, Winnie appeared from the hiding place where she had stored her emergency supplies. She had a large scabbard in hands. The protruding hilt of a sword indicated that the scabbard wasn't empty. She gave the scabbard to Merly and found a place to sit at the back of the circle underneath a palm tree. Shields ed her there. Merly moved into the center of the circle, stood next to Sleepy-time Joe, and spoke to the mermaids. "Leviathan murdered Merable. We are here today to say goodbye to her properly. We are also here to say goodbye to her killer." Merly pulled the sword out of the scabbard and held it high. She turned in the circle so that all could see it. The sword shone in the sunshine. "We all saw Leviathan kill Merable. He was proud of what he did. He deserves what will happen to him here." Then, she gave the sword to Murray. Murray strode to the tail end of Leviathan's coils. "We'll need that log over here," he pointed and two mermaids obliged. Murray helped them to drape Leviathan's tail over it and the two mermaids stepped back. Murray positioned himself over the tail, swung the sword over his head three times and then played Let's have a guillotine party. Leviathan didn't seem to object. Murray ed the sword to Merly who thrust it into the sand several time to clean it while Murray and his two helpers threw the severed tail into the ocean and reed the circle. Merly stepped forward again, but this time to talk. "For those of you who wish to participate, you will have the opportunity to use the sword to lop off more of Leviathan's coils. [In Winnie's mind, they were cutting him down to size.] The men will adjust Leviathan's coils over the log while the women will throw his remains deep into the ocean. I will wake him up when all of you who wish to participate have had an turn with the sword." # # # # # # # #

The death ceremony went slowly but steadily. All of the mermaids ed in. Merly offered the sword to Shields and Winnie, but both declined. This was mermaid justice, not heavenly justice. With only Merly's turn remaining, Leviathan's body had two large coils, his neck, and his head intact. Merly declined to take the sword. Instead, she stood in

front of Leviathan, picked up the disc, turned it off, and spun it away. Leviathan gained consciousness immediately, but needed time to become aware of his shortness. ... "My name is Merly. I am the queen of the mermaids. I had this done to you because you killed one of us. Her name was Merable. She didn't deserve to die, but you killed her without warning. I am giving you a warning. You will die and I'm the one who will kill you. You can't flee. You have one minute of life left." Then, Merly stood there, counting down. Blubberless-gutless-helmetless looked around. He was in the middle of a circle of mermaids. None of them had weapons. The mermaid in front of him had no weapon either. He had enough coil to raise his head so that he towered over her. She did nothing. He opened his mouth and bit her head completely off. At least that had been his intent. "I have melting blubber all over me," Merly complained and headed for the ocean. Leviathan would have headed to the ocean too, but he had no head. All that was left of him was a charred skull sitting in a pool of grease. Murray picked up the skull and dived into the ocean to clean it off. # # # # # # # #

"What will the mermaids do with his skull?" Winnie asked Merly. They were alone on the beach, which was back to its pre-serpent condition. Merly had publicly thanked Winnie and Shields and that had prompted the mermaids to line up to thank the two of them personally. Mermaidian thanks included bodily . Mermaids hugged. Even the men. Go figure. Murray had been at the end of the line. Winnie noticed that his hug with Shields

was a lot more intense than his hug with her. They disappeared into the trees after that. That's how Winnie ended up alone with Merly, a sword, a container of diamonds and a motorcycle helmet with a shield for a visor. "We will create a large nest where we will meet for ceremonies. The skull will hang at the entrance to remind us to be vigilant. We'll also use it to scare little mermaids into being good." "I'm glad to hear that you're thinking of having little mermaids." "Winnie, we have to find a way to move all that plastic off the surface of the oceans. We'll never be able to have babies at this rate. Your oceans are too big. They have too much plastic." "I was thinking the same thing. I'll put some scientists onto it. You should take those diamonds with you." "But they aren't ours." "You rescued them from a creature from Hell. Why would you give them back? "We shouldn't do that." "You will need money from time to time if you need something that you can't find in the oceans. You can exchange a diamond for money. I'll show you how. The mermaids earned this. We wouldn't be able to resume cleaning our oceans if you hadn't caught Leviathan. Take the diamonds. Put Murray in charge of them." "I saw Murray and Shields kissing." "Oh. ... That makes you the first to see them kiss." "Is that a problem? You look unhappy." "I was hoping to see their first kiss, but I'm happy for them." "What did you think about the sad song we sang for Merable?" "I liked how you had enough verses for each mermaid to sing one by herself." "Me too. I wanted everybody to participate."

"You have some very good singers. They sang really high." "That's all part of luring sailors." "Plus harmony on the chorus. That was good. I wasn't sure about one verse." "I think I know the verse. Was it this one?" Old McDonald had a farm, E I E I O. And on his farm he had a hamster, E I E I O. With a scritch scritch here and a scritch there, here a scritch, there a scritch, everywhere a scritch scritch. Old McDonald had a farm E I E I O. "That's the one. I'm not sure that farms had hamsters." "Maddy said that a hamster for the children would be in the farm house." "Maddy said?" "Yes. I needed another verse and I didn't know another animal." "I suppose farm kids could have had a hamster." "Did you know that the song doesn't have to be sad? Maddy showed me a way to make it a happy song." "Really?" "Yes. It's a sad song because McDonald was taken into slavery. But he escaped, and went back to his farm again where he was happy. So, for a happy song we sing, Old McDonald HAS a farm, E I E I O. Plus, we sing it faster. Would you like to hear it?" "No, that's OK. I've heard enough of Old McDonald." "Did you know that when he went back to his farm, he was so happy, and the farm was doing so well, that he decided to erect golden arches over his farm

house." "Is that so?" "Yes, that's what Maddy said. And other farmers saw them and they wanted to do that too. After a while, McDonald golden arches were all over the world. Maddy showed me pictures even." "I bet she did." "I think it's a happy song because the animals enjoyed hearing him sing it." "It wouldn't be so happy for the cows." "I don't understand. Why not?" "You know Merly, Maddy may be having a little bit of fun with you." "I know that." "You do?" "I can read faces, ?" "I tend to forget that." "When I see Maddy's face when she's joking me, she's not really lying. I see affection. She likes me. I like her." "Maddy can have difficulty showing affection. She had an unhappy childhood." "That's why she jokes you, Winnie." "Really?" "She's showing you affection." Back to the Table of Contents

Chapter 19

It was the day after Merable's funeral. Winnie and Galahad were in bed. Galahad was sound asleep. Winnie was not. She hadn't slept at all that night. Galahad stirred and rolled over. "Galahad, are you awake?" Galahad's eyes were completely closed, but sometimes he was awake with his eyes closed. "I am now. Do we have to have sex again?" "Not funny." "Got it. What's the matter?" "I'm sorry." "It's OK. I was going to wake up soon." "Not that. I'm sorry that I missed our anniversary." "What anniversary?" [Oops, this is not looking good. Guys, sometimes you can be excused for missing an important anniversary, but when you're subtly reminded that you missed it, you should at least know what anniversary it was that you missed.] "The anniversary of our first time." "First time of what?" [In his defense, Galahad was still waking up. The executioner should take it easy on him.] "The first time that we had sex." "You asked me to bring my PJs and I beat you to the bedroom." "That's the one. I'm sorry we didn't celebrate our anniversary. It's my fault. Women are supposed to remind their men about this. I'm a little late reminding you."

"That's OK. How late are you?" "Two years late." "We've never celebrated it?" [You're off the hook, Galahad.] "No. I'm sorry. It's my fault." "How does one normally celebrate the anniversary of having sex for the first time?" "Usually with a nice meal that you buy for me. Also some flowers." "Which I buy for you." "Yes." "What do I receive for OUR celebration?" "Guaranteed sex." "Don't I get guaranteed sex every time we... [Too much detail, Galahad.] "Yes. But this time, if I were angry at you, you'd get sex but it would be bad sex." "You're never mad at me. We have never had bad sex." [Too much detail, Galahad. This is a PG rated novel.] "OMG! OMG!" "What?" "We've missed celebrating Valentine's Day too." "What's Valentine's day?" "On February 14th, you buy me a nice meal, give me some flowers, and offer me chocolates in a heart shaped, pink box as a sign of your undying love for me." "What do I get?"

"Guaranteed sex." "So, just like our anniversary?" "Yes. Women have made it easy for men to what to do on special days. I have failed as a woman. I forgot about both of these important dates." "Heaven doesn't have any of these celebrations." "But mortals do. OMG. OMG." "Not another double OMG." "I've forgotten how to be a woman. I've lost my humanity. I'm in Heaven so much now that I'm completely an angel now." "How is that a bad thing?" "My humanity is important to me. I don't want to lose it." "Why don't we pick the important days and put them into our calendars?" "But losing my humanity is more than missing anniversaries." "Did you sleep at all?" "No." "You were stewing for hours?" "Yes." "Something bad happened in the operation. What was it?" "Nothing. I've told you how the operation went. Murray lured Leviathan onto land perfectly and Merly fried him. Nobody was hurt other than Leviathan. His body is in small pieces so he can't reincorporate." "What happened after Merly fried him?" ...

"Why don't you snuggle in?" ... "Will you tell me what happened?" "I didn't do something that I should have." "Start at the beginning?" # # # # # # # #

[Winnie described how the mermaids sang a funeral song and how that song was not really appropriate for a funeral. Maddy had been pranking Merly. We'll resume from here.] "Did Merly know about the pranking?" "Yes, she knew from the beginning. She had read Maddy's face." "So, she wasn't upset." "No, Merly considered Maddy's prank as a sign of affection. Pranking her was like Maddy saying that she liked her." "And?" "She said that was why Maddy has been pranking me too." "And that upset you?" Winnie nodded. "Why?" "I had been a little sharp with Maddy when I thought she had been pranking me. I knew Maddy was very closed but didn't realize what the pranks meant. She had opened up to me and I was sharp. I shouldn't have been that way."

"Has she stopped pranking you?" "No. She got me good back in October." "So, no harm done." "Merly had a tough childhood too. Her mom was a beast to her. Karita told me that Merly needed love and she needed it from me. I guess I was her replacement mom. I tried to show her love." "But?" "After everybody had left, Merly looked like she wanted a hug. It was a big day for her. I should have hugged her but I didn't. I don't know why." "There's probably a reason." "Did I tell you about Paula and what happened when she visited Lylah for the first time?" "I knew that you had arranged for that to happen." "Lylah gave Azure to her to hold and disappeared into the house. Paula was so overwhelmed by having a grandbaby in her arms that she completely broke down into tears." "That was a special circumstance because of being a spirit. Plus she actually was the birth mother." "I don't know if I would break down into tears. I know that I'm not mother material. I couldn't even hug Merly, even though I like her. I don't hug Maddy either, but I like her. How can I be a good mother when I can't hug anybody?" "Do you still want babies?" "Not now. Babies and children need to be loved. I've always said that I'm not mother material. Now, I've proven it." # # # # # # # #

"Are all mortal women huggers?" "I don't know." "What about your family?" "Yollie isn't. She played Assassinate the doll if anybody ever gave her one." "What about your mom?" "There was a time when Mom decided that she would hug everybody and tell them she loved us. [Nick of Time, #11.] Everybody wondered if she were dying. Reese and I were deputized to find out why she was acting so strangely." "But, she was a good mom when you were growing up, wasn't she?" "Yes, she was always there for me. Sometimes we hugged, but even back then, I didn't really want to." "What brother are you closest to?" "Reese. He's a little older than I am." "Does he hug you?' "No, but I know he likes me." "How do you know that?" "He made himself my protector. He was always protecting me until you came along." "Does he hug you?" "No. Never." "But he shows you what he feels for you. You lived in a family with six brothers. How would they have treated you if you had been a girly-girly?" "They would have teased me unmercifully."

"But they didn't. Did they tease Yollie?" "Never. Yollie had blackmail ammunition on all of them." "Why didn't they tease you?" "I was tiny. They took pity on me." "How did you react to this?" "I resented being treated like a baby just because I was small. I did everything they did. I showed them that I wasn't a scaredy cat." "So, you become a miniature boy that would never think about hugging anybody because if you did, you would be teased." "Huh." "You grew up in an environment where hugging was not common. Does that mean that your parents didn't love you?" "No. I know they love me." "What about your sisters-in-law? Who would you say was the least likely to be a non-hugging mother?" ... "That would be Bean. She was a stone cold assassin. She killed tons of men." "Isn't she the one who was taking care of Maddy in Montana? Didn't she have a baby recently?" "Beansprout. About two years ago." "Poor kid. Saddled with a cold mother. Hopefully, the dad is warm and cuddly." "That's Cowboy. He's a lawman and was an assassin too." "That's so sad. People like that shouldn't have kids. They saddled her with a name that is will get her teased for life, and on top of that, neither of them will

hug her or comfort her. She'll be a psycho-killer in twenty years." "Beansprout is her nickname. Her real name is Cheryl-Lyn." "Still, neither parent is a hugger. According to you, they're not parent material and they shouldn't have had a baby." "Huh." # # # # # # # #

"Where'd you go? Did I say something wrong?" "No. I went to Montana and peaked in on Bean. Cheryl-Lyn had fallen down outside and had a big bleeding scrape on her knee. Bean was sitting on the ground, rocking her in her arms, and kissing her. She had blood smears all over her clothes." "That doesn't sound like an assassin to me." "No, it doesn't. I stopped off on the way home. I don't see why men always have to give women the anniversary gift." "What's in the bag?" "Flowers and a big box of chocolates in a heart shaped, pink box as a sign of my undying love for you." "How can I thank you?" "I believe guaranteed sex has been mentioned." Back to the Table of Contents

Chapter 20

Winnie, we're here in Havana. The crew is preparing to unload all of the crates. (Momaka) That's good news. Did everything go smoothly? (Winnie) The trip from Japan was wonderful. Tanaka has two solar powered cargo ships and that's what they used to bring everything to Havana. The only tricky part was going from the Pacific to the Atlantic Ocean. The Isthmus of Panama was mostly underwater and somebody had installed buoys to guide ships through. The freighters were shallow hulled so we didn't have trouble. What about the plastic on the ocean? Japanese people are very smart, if I do say myself. They had installed a device in front of the bow that would push the plastic away. They were sort of like the old icebreakers when there used to be ice. One ship followed in the wake of the other and that worked well. They had a diver if any of the plastic became caught in the propeller. We went slowly with lookouts stationed on top of both masts. They found the clearest places, so we zigzagged to avoid the bad spots. Plus we could only travel when we had light. That's why it took so long. Stu and I had a cabin to ourselves. I relaxed in the sun. Stu actually climbed the mast and sat in what they called the crow's nest and worked as a plastic swamp spotter. How'd your speech to the government go? Our captain anchored the ships in the harbor and flew a white flag to show that that we were coming in peace. Stu and I took the lifeboat into Havana and told the Cubans what we wanted to do. I had to repeat myself a lot because nobody knew what to do with us. Eventually a guy with a lot of military braid listened to me. We had to take him to the freighters where he inspected what we were carrying. If he pointed at a crate, we had to open it. Then he wanted to inspect the crew's quarters and asked to see any guns that we were carrying. We said that we had none. He said that we would have to stay on the ship and he would be back in a day or two.

It was only a day and this time he brought an army boat and took Stu and me into their government house. We met in a big room but only six men were there. Two were wearing uniforms; the other four had suits. Stu and I had dressed up a well. I was wearing a traditional Japanese kimono and Stu had his best suit. I described what we wanted to give them and how it would help them. I also described how Tanaka would install the system for them, and at the same time, train some Cubans how to operate it and maintain it. I emphasized how much steady power they would have and how Cubans would be getting jobs out of this. I couldn't answer their technical questions but said that the people back at the ship could do that. They kept asking about the price and Stu kept on saying that a company that wanted to help Cuba was paying for everything. They wanted to know who the company was, so Stu brought out the contract and went through it with them. He was pressured to say more about the numbered company, but Stu said that he was unable to tell them. They asked if I had been born in Japan and I said yes. They asked if Stu was born in the old US and he said that he was Canadian. Finally, they ran out of questions. They took us to a small guesthouse on the grounds of their Government House and left us there. We're waiting now for them to make a decision. Stu said that the house was probably bugged so we're being careful not to say much. I don't see why they wouldn't accept. Two of the men were clearly interested and wanted more information on the wind and on the solar technology. I'm thinking these were the two ministers responsible for that. The two army guys were the suspicious ones. The other two were the president and the vice president of the country. Those two were introduced and we shook hands with them. I did my little bow and Stu tried to stand up straight. You know how he slouches. Good news then. I think so. I hope that I can tour through the country during the installation. Stu says that we'll have to stay until Tanaka signs the equipment over to them. That could be a month. How's Petey? The committee is stuck on the merits of buying chicks or fertilized eggs. They also are considering how they could get chicks or eggs to Cuba. Melissa has them poring over maps, calculating cost per chick, and then observing the routes first hand. Izzy is a natural leader; no surprise there. Nobody is being a pain.

Does he miss us? He asks about you every day. Liar. He's doing fine, Momaka. Gotta go. Somebody is knocking on the door.

Back to the Table of Contents

Chapter 21

Hank/Winnie, we have a situation here. Momaka and I are not in danger for the time being but four high-ranking officers of the North Korean military have interrogated us. They claimed that Cuba had asked them to provide technical assistance regarding the power grid that we had offered them. Their soldiers are currently searching the two freighters for weapons and they assured us that they would find them. They asked us the same questions as the Cubans had and we gave them the same answers. After six hours of questions about the equipment, our motives, and our citizenship, their response to our answers could be boiled down to 'Did we think they were fools?' (Stu) What do they think we're doing? (Hank) Apparently North Korea considers the US and Japan as their mortal enemies. Cuba is an ally of North Korea and they have a mutual defense pact. They believe that I am an American in disguise. Momaka is clearly Japanese. They think that their two worst enemies have ed together to destroy Cuba. (Stu) How would we do that? (Hank) We're trying to take over the Cuban power infrastructure and once we are in charge of that, we will never leave. A simple threat to shut off the power will make Cuba our vassals. (Stu) What is your status? (Hank) We are under house arrest in a guest cottage on the grounds of the government property. The cottage has only one door and that door is guarded 24/7. We have food, such as it is, and water. We could leave whenever we wanted with our slings, but the Japanese crew would pay for that. (Stu) Any ideas on numbers? (Winnie) No. We have only seen the four officers. The Cubans were not present during the interrogation, but they knew we were being questioned since the North Koreans used their big meeting hall. (Stu)

What do you think, Winnie? Send Lucas and Mac to scout? (Hank) Yes. I'll pop by on my way to Montana too. (Winnie) Momaka wants you to know that Bob has showed up. He's been away for a long time. She has him under control right now. (Stu) Good to know. (Winnie)

Back to the Table of Contents

Chapter 22

It's the next day. Winnie, Mac and Melissa were meeting in Hank's living room. Yolanda was in the kitchen. She had taken over Granny's traditional baking duties. "Brownies," she said as she put a plate on the table. "Cookies are coming." Hank made the first grab. "I thought that the three of you should be reunited for this operation," he said. "What did you call yourself?" "The Transcendental Trio," Melissa recalled. "Was that the operation with Valkendorff?" Mac asked. "Yes," Winnie ed. "We painted him. I got to see a naked old geezer for the first time. It was not the highlight of my life." [Tickled Pink, #12] "I've asked Winnie to take the lead on this. She has a special interest in seeing this through seeing as how Cuba was her idea." "Thanks for the blame, Dad. Do you guys mind? I do want to finish this Cuba project off. We can collaborate. Is Lucas ing us?" "I know what he's going to say," Mac said. "He wanted to spend some time at home." "Azure is standing up on her own now. Here are the cookies. I can do more if you want." "This is great, Mom. Mac, what do we know for sure?" "North Korean soldiers are definitely in Cuba. We saw three attack helicopters and one troop transport and they were marked as NK. We couldn't get an accurate count of personnel but we know that most of the officers are staying in Government House. The bulk of the soldiers are on the two Japanese freighters and are opening all of the crates. The Japanese crew are locked into their crew quarters with guards on both doors. The two officers in charge of the searching

are positioned in the wheelhouse where they have control over the ships' communications." "What armaments do they have in addition to the three attack copters?" "They have plenty of rifles and hand guns. We didn't see anything bigger. What did you see, Winnie?" "I focused on the battle ground. The North Korean forces can be handled easily. But, the ships are in the middle of Havana harbor. The officers are staying in the center of Havana. We could end up in a street-to-street fight if we don't obtain complete surprise and if any North Korean is not where he's supposed to be." "Are you thinking of involving the Guardian Angels? If so, Lucas says that he's in. He put some drones in the skies just in case." "I am thinking of them. I'm also thinking of the Valkyries." "We're in. Now what?" "We wait." "For?" "We wait for the rest of the North Koreans to arrive. They can't do anything with that small of a force." "Yolanda, can I take some of these leftover goodies home?" Melissa called out to the kitchen. "Take them all, Melissa. I'm putting in another batch for Mac." Melissa had to explain. "Will and Izzy loved Yolanda's goodies when the youngsters were meeting about the chickens. All of them did. I just don't have time to bake goodies. None of us moms do. Three of them have entered puberty, so they're eating non-stop. Will is definitely looking and acting like William now. You can't walk outside without hearing distant explosions." "I have to go home more often. Melissa, do you hug your kids a lot?"

"Of course I do." "Even now when they're in puberty?" "Especially now. Puberty is scary for them. But, you can't hug them in public. Why are you asking?" "I've been wondering if I'm mother material." "Really?" "Really?" "Really?" Yolanda chimed in from the kitchen, "Really?" "Relax guys. Nothing is imminent. What else is important for a mom to do besides hugging?" It was at that point that Hank slipped out of the room. None of the women noticed because Winnie was thinking of having a baby!! # # # # # # # #

Melissa and Mac had left and Yolanda was telling Winnie that she did get hugged when she was growing up. She usually pushed Yolanda away if the boys were doing something that she could do with them. But she also needed hugs sometimes. There was that time when she was accused of lying about borrowing William's bot without permission when she hadn't borrowed it at all. Everybody was looking at her and not believing her, so she stomped off to her bedroom. Yolanda had followed and ended up holding her on her lap, hugging her. That's when they had discovered that Winnie could see lies. [Assassination Day, #3] Winnie and Yolanda were beginning to discuss whether she needed hugs when she was sad, or when she was angry and frustrated, when Lucas interrupted the ' when?' festivities with news that more North Koreans were landing in Havana as he watched. Winnie left immediately and met Lucas over Havana.

# # # # # # # #

"They came in four troop transports," Lucas pointed out. "One was full of land transports for personnel and equipment. Two transports were full of crates which they are unloading now. The fourth had army personnel. I couldn't get a count. They're setting up what looks to be a military base at the airport. They now have artillery fortifications by the airport building as well. Personnel bunkers are at the top of the beach. That would be in case of a marine invasion. Sniping positions are on the airport's building roof." "What are they setting up now?" "Two mobile missile launchers. We should be seeing two missiles soon." .... "Those missiles are nuclear missiles," Lucas observed. "At least they were before we neutralized them." "Will they use them? If so, how far can they fly?" "Earlier this century, North Korea would threaten nearby countries with their missiles. For example, they'd fire missiles over Japan and into the ocean behind whenever Japan annoyed them. That distance was 1,000 miles or so. Supposedly, they had longer-range missiles too. Those missiles on those launchers could reach anywhere in the former southern US from Havana. Even though the nuclear fissionable materials are gone, they could cause a lot of deaths." "How do you know so much about this?" "Jock said that Saskatchewan officers had to know about every military event in the last one hundred years. He made sure that I did. North Korea was a rogue country for a long time. Talk to TG. He knows a lot about them and can even speak a few words." ... "What are they doing now?"

"Setting up choke points on all the major intersections. If necessary, they can shut the city down. Those are Cuban police with them. They are there to show Havana citizens that the Cuban government is ing the North Koreans." "Are those heavy duty weapons in their hands?" "Yes. Rapid-fire automatic weapons. I'm surprised to see them here. They'd usually be issued to guard the most important part of the city's defenses, which would be the beaches. They're probably intent on scaring the people into submission." "They're certainly scaring me. Have they finished sending troops to Cuba now?" "Probably. They have the city under control now. The Japanese technicians are locked away. Stu and Momaka are not threats to them, they think. All the North Koreans need to do now is work themself into righteous anger and kill as many Americans as they can with those missiles. They've always wanted to do that. It doesn't matter that the US doesn't exist anymore. These guys are crazy." "Who would be driving this?" "The generals and the dictator's family. The North Korean people themselves are interested mostly in not doing anything to threaten their daily supply of food. Do you see that antenna the soldiers are putting on the top of the airport building?" "Yes." "That's their communication link home. You'll have to decide if you want them to use that. If not, destroy it early. The Guardian Angels can take out their military." "Can you keep the Cuban population safe while you do that?" "No." Back to the Table of Contents

Chapter 23

It's the next day. We're back in Yolanda's house with the never-ending oven of fresh hot goodies. Mac, Melissa, Lucas, Hank and Winnie were there too. "You say that you came up with this idea on the way back from Cuba?" Yolanda asked. "Yes, Mom. I flew slowly. It gave me time to think. We'll need a place to stay over there. Lucas, can we move a Wilizy ship into Havana reasonably quickly?" "The Wilizy/Europe is the closest. It's anchored over KwaZulu right now." "Does it have the usual cannons and cannon balls?" "I'm sure it does." "Could you ask Wolf to fly the ship to Cuba and see if he take Jock with him? He might enjoy the trip. Tell Wolf to bring his loudspeaker system to Cuba with him. When can the ship be there?" "It's a short trip," Lucas observed. "You can expect it in twenty-four hours. What about ship provisions?" "How much is there now?" Hank intervened. "All of the ships have enough provisions for a week." "For how many people, Dad?" "Twenty." "That should do it. We'll need sleeping pads. Dad, can you take care of readying that ship?" "I'll need to hear your plan. I assume you have one." "I do. Let's get Jock and Stu on a mind message network. The directors will have

to approve this." # # # # # # # #

Winnie has outlined the plan and has opened up the floor for discussion. Stu spoke first: You have a lot of people in the plan. Do you need this many? I wanted to involve as many of the family as I could. We haven't had a full family call out recently. I haven't approached them yet. Some may not be able to come. If so, others can do double duty. (Winnie) You have eight youngsters, Winnie. Isn't that dangerous for the mission? What if they made a mistake? (Yolanda) The youngsters have been working together as a group for over a month, Mom. In Cuba, an adult will always be there to help. They'll be easy to supervise because they'll be keen to finally be doing something in an operation other than sensor duty. Lucas and Theo were fighting battles at that age. It's time to for them to contribute more. (Winnie) They're ready for this, Yolanda. They behave as mature teenagers when they are working as a Wilizy team. (Melissa) You have Liset as a media presentation programmer. What's that? (Hank) She'll be preparing a sort of documentary of the battle. She's been in operations before but this is her first time in an important role. Yollie said that she likes writing. This would be like a chapter in a book about the Wilizy if there ever were such a thing. I think she'll do well. (Winnie) # # # # # # # #

That evening, after the meeting was over, Winnie mind-messaged Mac. Mac, I'm trying to pair the youngsters up with parents as much as possible, but I

can't do that for Emily because you'll be far too busy with the Valkyries. I don't know her very well. Can you tell me about her? What is she like? (Winnie) You should come over and see for yourself. Now? Sure. We've finished supper and we're all into personal time now. Does she know that she'll be going to Cuba? Yes. How'd she react? You should come over and see for yourself. # # # # # # # #

Winnie and Mac were sitting on the sofa in the living room. Wolf was in the basement puttering around in his workshop. Jock was doing homework in his bedroom. Emily had been sitting in an armchair in the living room but had stood up when Winnie had come in. When Winnie declined to have anything to eat or drink, Emily sat down again. Emily was Mac's height but willowy. She had long brown hair that was tied in a tight bun on the top of her head. She wore blue jeans and a collared yellow shirt. Both had had a visit from an iron in the last day. No make up. No fingernail polish and no toe nail polish either. She was wearing open toe sandals. Oh, and she had brown skin. "Emily, you know Auntie Winnie." "Hi." "She's here to find out if you want to be part of the family operation that I told you about. Is that something that you'd like to do?" "Yes. Can I go to my bedroom now?"

"Why? We're meeting." "I have stuff to do." "What stuff." "Personal stuff." "OK." ... "Winnie, that's what I have to deal with. Every day." # # # # # # # #

"I don't know how much you've heard of my mom and dad when I was growing up. My dad was a general, as you know, and he wanted me to be a soldier. I was female, but that didn't matter. I was an army brat from a very early age. At one point, I ran the base for him. My mother, Emily, was a quiet, somewhat shy woman. I think she was intimidated by my dad's forcefulness. She didn't stand up to him very often. She lived her own private life, which focused on playing the piano, I think." "Emily is like her grandmother. She's living her own private life in her bedroom. I am not allowed in and I would never force the issue. I don't know what she does in there. She doesn't play loud music like Hank. But on weekdays, she's in the bedroom all the time when she's not in school. On weekends, she walks by herself a lot. She's with us for meals, she does her family chores, but she doesn't speak much. She does her own laundry and she cleans her room weekly." "How is she in school?" "She receives excellent marks. Teachers wonder why I ask for interviews. I feel like all they know about her is her marks. They know nothing else. They don't know that she goes to school very early and she comes home very late. I assume that she's studying, but she has a study table in her bedroom, so I don't know about that. She's not athletic. I can't imagine her in a sports team. She does keep

active though. She slings to a location that's a good distance away from the school and walks in. That means that she walks several miles every weekday, which requires her to leave for school early, but not as early as she does. She shuts me out of her life here at home and at school. I don't know why. I've never yelled at her nor have I mistreated her." "So you can't suggest what role I might give her." "I don't have the foggiest idea. Melissa said that she was well behaved during their planning meetings. She contributed, but not as much as the others. She was very organized and volunteered to keep the minutes. During non-meeting times, she didn't chat with the others. Melissa characterized her as being on the fringe of the group, looking in." "Sounds like she's shy." "Or timid." "What do you want me to do?" "Ask her what role in Cuba she might like. You'll have to suggest some things. I gave both of the kids only a broad outline of the operation." "What if she doesn't want me in her room?" "Meet elsewhere? Ice cream at the WD&D?" "She knows about the WC&D?" "She wanted her own at the store. She buys her own clothes. I can only see what she bought when I see them on her." "How old is she?" "Ten, this year." "Hormonal influences?" "Not yet. Gawd help me what that happens. Just tell me if she's a decent kid. I fell off the tracks when I was young. I don't want her to have that same kind of

experience." # # # # # # # #

Tap, tap. "Emily, it's Winnie." Emily opened the door an inch or two. "Hi," she said through the gap. "I should talk with you about the job you'll have when we're in Cuba. May I come in?" "Sure." "My goodness, you have a big bedroom." "Yes. Dad wanted us to have a lot of room for ourselves. I guess you guys lived in close quarters when he was growing up." "We did." "May I offer you a drink or something to eat? I have chocolates and peanuts. Cold juice?" "Up here in your bedroom?" "Yes. I bought a micro fridge at the WC&D and I keep the juice and chocolates in it. It means if I'm in the middle of something, I don't have to go downstairs." "I'm good, thanks. I like the way you have positioned your bed diagonally out of the corner." "I like diagonal lines. Straight up and down lines are too military." "Bureau in another corner, study desk in another corner. This is very nice. Did you buy new bedding too?" "No. I like these colors."

"What's this?" "It's called fabric art. It's like a painting, but with pieces of fabric instead of paint. This is the start of my second piece. I use a plywood board and attach pieces of fabric to it. Right now the board is lying down. When it's finished, I'll hang it on a wall." "It's a three dimensional work of art!" "Yes. I've sketched it out a bit on the plywood. This part will be a forest. Over here, I'll put a deer. Perhaps a fawn. I haven't decided. Some blue sky up here. I got the idea when I was out walking in the woods and I saw a little fawn. I love walking in the woods. Those small tubs against the wall have fabric scraps. You can have thin fabric, fuzzy fabric, and shiny fabric for example. Selecting the right fabric type is a tough thing to do. Sometimes, I'll have six different potential fabrics on the board for one spot. In addition, I have to decide what shape to cut it. Fabric art is very complicated and takes me a lot of time to get it right." "How do you manage that with your homework?" "I don't do homework. Whatever schoolwork I have to do, I do it while the teacher is talking. They don't mind. Would you like to see the fabric bins?" "Sure." ... "It's hard to organize them by color because some pieces have multiple colors. I organize them by fabric type." "I can see that. Where did you find all these pieces?" "I know about a fabric store in Calgary. They're always cutting fabric for their customers. They put their scraps in a huge bin for me to scrounge through. The owner is a fabric artist. I took a picture of my first try and showed it to her. She said she'd help me by giving me all the scraps I wanted." "Where is your first try? I don't see it here."

"I gave it to the school librarian." "That's a topic I'd love to explore. Can we sit?" "You can sit here on the chair. I'll sit on the bed. Drink? Something to munch on?" "Juice and some peanuts?" .... "You have plates in your bedroom for the peanuts?" "Peanuts are greasy and leave little crumblets. If they fall on my fabric or on my painting, they'll leave marks." "What's so special about the librarian?" "Last year, I helped her out before school started. I was checking in books mostly but I did other things too. This year, I'm doing more. Since they needed to keep the library open at lunch, the librarian had to stay there. That meant she would get her lunch in the first period of the afternoon. But that meant that the library would have to be closed. So, she said that I could work the library at lunch and that meant it would be open the next period. She called me her librarian assistant, but I don't get paid. She'll give me a reference letter if I ever want it." "Do you do other library chores for her too?" "I do now. In the morning, I put together a list of all the people who are late returning their books. That list goes to the homeroom teachers. That way, the books come back in and can be borrowed by others. After school, I check to see if everything has been put back on the shelves properly." [Is she using her?] "Does the librarian have to leave early?" "Yes, she has to pick up her kids or something." [Yes, she is using her.] "Do you want to be a librarian when you're grown up?"

"Yuck." "So why are you spending so much time in the library?" "Because it's way better than wandering around the school by myself during lunch hour." "No friends?" "Do you know what ten year old girls are like at this age?" "I never went to a formal school." "You're lucky. I wouldn't want to be friends with any of them even if I could, but I can't." "Why not?" "I don't make friends well. I don't know what to say. I'm happy being by my myself." "My brother Reese liked to by my himself until he met Karita. Let's talk about the Wilizy. I think you'd could become an important warrior." "Doing what?" "During the coming battle, I'll be observing the battlefield. If I see any problems, I'll have to fix them. I'd like to have you with me so that you can see what a battlefield is like. I may give you some little tasks to complete too." "What happens if I make a mistake? Will people die?" "No. We don't take chances like that." What will YOU do if I make a mistake?" .... "What would you like me to do, Emily?" "I'd like you to give me a second chance to do it right."

[There it is.] "I promise to do that." # # # # # # # #

Emily is not falling off the tracks, Mac. I thought she was amazing for her age. She's a little shy and likes to be alone. She finds it difficult to meet others in school. She's very creative and is a hard worker. I think she'll handle watching over battlefield conditions. Have to run.

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Chapter 24

In the week leading up to the battle, the preparations went smoothly. Wolf and Jock brought the Wilizy/Europe from Africa to the Caribbean. Yolanda moved into the ship so that Yo-Yo and Petey could practice flying it and landing it. Hank and Jock found all of the extra little bits of equipment that the Wilizy would need, including sleeping pads and more food and water. Ten of the Valkyries would need specialized costumes, but they took care of those themselves. Always the rebel, Marie wanted to have a special outfit too but Mac balked at what she wanted. This time, Marie won the argument. Lucas, Stanley and Lohla took the Guardian Angels to the Caribbean in a troop transport and ran a final battle rehearsal on the deserted island of Puerto Rico. They were fifteen flying minutes away from Havana. Stu and Momaka talked live with Winnie daily when she and Emily were scouting the city and the Japanese freighters. The Wilizy hostages were doing well, but were looking forward to a diet that required teeth. Bob was behaving himself, partly because no North Korean came near the guesthouse. A Cuban in a private's uniform dropped off food regularly, always apologizing profusely for their imprisonment. Stu recognized the soldier as one of government men they had met. North Koreans were guarding the Japanese on their ships and had found nothing that could be considered a weapon. With the weekend coming up, Winnie decided that the main battle should be on the Saturday. Melissa agreed and they notified the Wilizy who flew to where the Wilizy/Europe was anchored in the sky and found a place to put their things. # # # # # # # #

Here's a copy of the Order of Battle that Melissa distributed to everybody.

Order of Battle, Cuba, January 20, 2096

Battle Commander: Melissa with her daughter Izzy

Guardian Angels Corp: Lucas, Stanley, and Lohla

Hostages: Stu and Momaka

Madam: Marie

Media Presentation Programmer: Liset and her sister Ivanika

Ship Navigation: Yolanda, her granddaughter Yo-Yo, and her grandson Petey

Ship Transport from Africa to Caribbean: Wolf and his son, Jock

Negotiations and Scavengers: Hank and Jock Senior

Battlefield Observers: Winnie and Emily, Mac/TG's daughter

Valkyries: Mac

Weaponry: William and his son Will

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Chapter 25

Late afternoon, Friday, January 20, 2096. Melissa sent this mind message to the Wilizy forces: This is Battle Command: We are now under battle conditions. This mic is hot. Everybody can hear the orders. Please do not respond to any order on our mental mind network, even those that are directed to you. The only time that you should say anything is if you can't follow the plan. Due to our large numbers, we have to observe radio silence. Those of you who need to give instructions to your team, do that directly. Do not mind-message. [Narrator: I won't describe the help that the youngsters received from their partners.] # # # # # # # #

This is Battle Command: Yolanda, Petey and Yo-Yo, please bring the Wilizy/Europe down to ocean level and remove invisibility. Set course for Havana Harbor. # # # # # # # #

This is Battle Command: William and Will, please roll out the cannon on the port side of the ship so that the enemy can see that you are preparing to fire. ... This is Battle Command: Yolanda, Petey, and Yo-Yo, we are now approaching the point at which enemy fire might be able to reach the ship. Before that mark, please turn the ship so that the cannon are facing Havana. Liset and Ivanika: prepare to film the shot.

... This is Battle Command: William and Will, please fire one shot at Havana at your pleasure. ... This is Battle Command: Will, please inform the Wilizy of the success of that shot. This is Will: The shot soared high into the air and fell well short of the city's installations. This is Battle Command: Mission was accomplished. Yolanda, Petey and Yo-Yo, please take us out of the harbor and out of sight. # # # # # # # #

This is Battle Command: With darkness enveloping the city, we will now resume battle. All Valkyries and Marie, please deploy to your starting positions. Emily has warned us that some citizens are still in the streets. Be careful to stay hidden for now. ... This is Battle Command: Valkyrie Group A, please begin to search inner Havana for citizens. Emily advises that North Koreans who had been manning the checkpoints are now drinking in the bars. # # # # # # # #

Narrator: The twenty women in Valkyrie Group A were dressed in dark clothes that wouldn't identify them as foreigners. Almost all spoke Spanish. Those that couldn't speak Spanish had memorized what they had to say, namely that a battle was coming and the citizens of Havana would not be safe on Saturday. They were to flee to the east and tell every other citizen they saw to them.

The North Koreans at their check points had tried to intimidate the Cubans but without much success. When the Cubans complained to the Cuban police at the checkpoints, they told them that nobody wanted the North Koreans in Cuba, but they had no choice. North Koreans did not speak Spanish, nor did they properly translate the hand signals that the Cubans were flashing at them. They thought they were welcoming them to the city and so flashed the same hand signal back. That did not go over well. Thus, no Havana citizen warned authorities what was happening. # # # # # # # #

This is Battle Command: Valkyrie Group B and Marie. Emily advises that the house you want to use is now empty. The nearest pub is one block to the east and it is full of North Koreans. You may begin your mission. Liset and Ivanika, please move to shooting position #1. # # # # # # # #

Narrator: Valkyrie Group B consisted of ten very skimpily dressed women. If you were a North Korean in a bar, you might observe that these ten women were very attractive. They were probably also cold, since the ratio of clothes versus skin greatly favored the skin. They appeared with a bottle in their hands and big smile on their face. They must have found that bar to be too noisy for temporary friendships to be celebrated properly because their hand signals indicated that these women wanted the soldiers to follow them. On the walk, certain pieces of their already skimpy clothing might have had wardrobe malfunctions. They arrived at a very nice house. Waiting for them on the porch of the house was an old lady, at least mostly an old lady. She was wearing a pair of hiking boots and a flashy skirt that would have fit in nicely in a square dance. Above her waist, she wore long white gloves. That was it. Certain parts of her upper anatomy that were disclosed appeared to be quite young. This mesmerized the soldiers who wondered why somebody who was so wrinkled and old might have parts of her body that certainly weren't wrinkled. Moisturizer cream was probably the reason.

The madam of the house shooed the ten young women up the stairs to what may have been bedrooms. By now, the soldiers definitely knew what kind of house this was and what kind of women were scurrying up the stairs, giggling and waving their bottles. The madam took up position at the bottom of the staircase, left hand held high in a stop sign message. She formed the soldiers into a single line that extended well into the street. Turns out that that bar had been full of soldiers. The madam's left hand pointed to the first soldier and then to the bedrooms upstairs. The first soldier nodded vigorously. That left hand then pointed to the soldier's pistol and her right hand motioned "I'll take that." Communications had now been established. There'd be no happy happy if you had a weapon. This seemed very reasonable to the man at the front of the line since he would be taking it off anyway. He quickly unbuckled his belt and offered it, along with the holster and gun for her consideration. She tossed it onto the floor behind her. Taking his elbow, she guided him upstairs and to the right. "There's a room up here where we can drink when we're finished," the soldier called out in Korean. Then, the men waiting below heard some feminine giggling and the sound of a door closing. By the time the madam had resumed her position at the foot of the stairs, everybody in the line had belt, gun and holster in their hands. The assembly line worked quite efficiently and the soldiers in the long line were suitably rewarded for their patience. Here's the reward that they received. When a soldier arrived at a designated bedroom door, a Valkyrie was there smiling. Marie whispered a few words and the soldier collapsed into the Valkyrie's arms. She giggled, dragged him into her bedroom, let him fall to the floor, and shut the door loudly. Meanwhile, Marie was preparing to bring another solider up the stairs where a Valkyrie awaited, her giggle already locked and loaded. The house actually was a house of ill repute. Winnie had looked for such houses when she was scouting Havana. This one was close to a bar and had lots of rooms. It was an easy choice. She and Emily waited until the occupants of the house had fled to the east, but not before locking the doors. Winnie showed Emily how to use William's lock picker. Once inside, they raided the liquor cabinets and brought ten bottles to the front door where the Valkyries armed

themselves but did not open the bottles. Somebody would return them to their rightful place later. Liset and Ivanika were invisibly outside when the soldiers arrived. They took pictures of the long line and the soldiers disarming themselves. When Marie and the Valkyries were finished, they entered the house and took pictures of all of the weapons scattered on the main floor. The upstairs bedroom had more scenery to enjoy. Soldiers were sleeping on the floor, on the bed, in the bathtub, etc. Marie's curse would last for eight hours, which would be more than long enough. # # # # # # # #

This is Battle Command: Marie reported that their first mission was successful. Twenty-five soldiers have been cursed and photographed. Valkyries in Group B are leaving the house and they are moving to the next location. Liset and Ivanika are accompanying them. .... This is Battle Command: Jock and Hank, please confiscate the North Korean weapons in the brothel and dispose of them. # # # # # # # #

[Narrator: Here's what happened next.] The Valkyries in Group B took their still full bottles of booze down to the harbor where they happened to find a lifeboat beached in the sand along with two oars. Two of them knew how to row a boat and it wasn't long before two bright searchlights from a dark freighter illuminated the boat and the women. The giggling and carousing had probably announced their arrival. Again, hand signals resulted in an invitation to come aboard - this time via a winch that hauled the lifeboat out of the water. A second lifeboat soon arrived. This one was from the second freighter where the guards had heard the fun and wanted to be part of it. By this time, Marie had found a suitable ageway

along with cabins behind doors where they could meet their new friends. This friendship turned out to be very brief, nevertheless, it was sufficiently long for the North Koreans to fall head over heals in love with the Valkyries. Sort of. Liset and Ivanika were there to record the scene. The Valkyries and Marie used their slings to fly to the Wilizy/Europe. Hank and Jock collected the weapons and disposed of them. Meanwhile back at the home of happy dreams, Lucas and the Guardian Angels had bundled up the sleeping beauties in the brothel and deposited them on the deck of the first freighter. The Guardian Angels then returned to Puerto Rico. That left Hank and Jock to release the crew of the freighter and show them the litter of sleeping bodies that had accumulated while they had been incarcerated. Jock was dressed in his official general's uniform and asked the captain of the freighter if he would mind storing thirty-three soldiers in the cargo holds of the Japanese freighters while maintaining radio silence. He would return to pick them up on Saturday. The captain agreed and sent some crew to the second freighter to release the Japanese imprisoned there.

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Chapter 26

Saturday, January 21. Battle day. Winnie and Emily were flying over Havana checking to see if any civilians were left in the city that might be at risk. The sun was creeping over the horizon and the city was awakening. "I haven't seen any civilians that could disrupt our plan," Winnie said. "Did you?" "No." "You have a job to do before we can signal that the battle can start." "What job?" "Sometimes a battle doesn't always go as planned. You can be hit with a random event that could ruin the entire plan. You have to make an adjustment to the plan quickly." "Is this a test?" "Call it an opportunity to learn something." "That's teacher talk for a test." "We have found out that the North Koreans have discovered our Guardian Angel Corp hiding on Puerto Rico. A spy is on the way to send a message to their forces in Havana and back home to North Korea. Their communications system is in that shed on the top of the airport building. Can you see it?" "Yes." "Can you see the two antennae on the top of airport tower behind it?" "Yes." "You could destroy their communications by tearing down those antennae, but the guard on the roof might notice and raise an alarm. Can you see the guard?"

"Yes." "The transmitter that can send out the warning message is in that shed behind a locked door that the soldier is guarding. Here's William's lock picker. You've seen me use it, so you should know how to lock and unlock doors. Do you?" "Yes." "The transmitter is on a table inside that shed. It's a black box with a microphone attached to it. Various knobs are on the front of the box. The back of the box is similar to other electronic equipment that allows for speakers or video screens to be plugged in. The cupboard behind the table has a spare microphone in case the first one malfunctions. You have to prevent that transmitter from working without leaving any signs that it has been sabotaged. You can access the weapons on your sling." "You have one person with you who might be able to help you, but she doesn't know anything about electronics. I'm that person. You're in charge. The spy is getting close. You should start thinking now. From now on we use mind messages." Emily accelerated towards the tower with the antennae. She made a quick circle around it and then hovered invisibly above the shed. She saw the door, she saw the guard. He was awake. There were no windows. The spy has entered the airport. He has to find the staircase and climb the stairs up to the roof. Does my helper know how to distract the guard and get him away from the door? She'll do that now. The guard jerked his head up when he heard a scraping sound at the back of the shed. He unholstered his weapon and began edging to the back of the shed. Emily unlocked the door and disappeared inside. The spy has found the staircase. ...

The spy is at level one. I'm done. The door is locked and I'm in the air. ... That was fast, but is the transmitter still functional? What did you do to it? I put a weak laser beam through one of input slots and waited for the top of the transmitter to feel hot. That told me that something inside had been fried. That transmitter will not function now and nobody will find any external evidence of it being disabled. How'd you know so much about transmitters? I didn't. But one of my library jobs is to test that the AV equipment is working properly and put it away. There are always cords and input slots in any electronic equipment that I've ever seen. Was this a real task? Yes, but not the spy part. That was to put pressure on you. You can message Melissa now that she can start the battle. # # # # # # # #

This is Battle Command: Emily reports that the battleground is clear of civilians. Yolanda, Petey, and Yo-Yo, please bring the Wilizy/Europe into Havana Harbour. Advise when you are within range. Liset and Ivanika, we'll want as many pictures of this battle as you can get for the folks back home. Lucas, Stanley and Lohla, please put the Guardian Angels into the air. Advise when you are in position. Wolf, we'll be ready for the pipes soon. Stand by. # # # # # # # #

The North Koreans manning the defensive positions on Havana Harbour noticed the sailing ship as soon as it appeared on the horizon. They recognized it as the ship that had tried to hit their defenses with an old fashioned cannon ball. An officer charged with determining range for their defensive weapons did his job and began counting down how many metres the ship had to sail further towards the harbor before North Korea's weapons could reach it and destroy it. An old fashioned wooden ship would be no match to modern weaponry. The wooden coffin still had a thousand metres to come when one of the sentries noticed a flash. "Incoming," he announced, but his warning was never heard given the huge explosion at the base of their nuclear-tipped long-range ballistic missile. Pieces of that missile were still in the air when their second and last nuclear-tipped long-range ballistic missile exploded. [Will was firing William's missiles.] The defenders saw the ship turn so that it was broadside to them. It stopped in place, the gun ports opened and eighteen cannon rolled forward into shooting position. A puff of smoke followed and something big lifted high into the air. Seven seconds later, a plume of water lifted into the air and descended in large drops. "One hundred meters short," the range officer announced. "That wasn't a cannon ball," he added. In the quiet that followed, the sound of some horrible screeching could be heard from the city behind them. [Narrator: This is how non-Scots refer to bagpipes.] The defenders turned to see what the noise was. They saw figures enveloped from head to toe in white. The only thing that wasn't white was the visor over their helmet. They were in a skirmish line and advancing slowing through the city's streets. Surprisingly, they carried no weapons. Another explosion drew the defenders' attention to the ship. "Seventy-five meters," a voice said. "Those are high explosive mortars. They're ranging their shots so they won't hit their soldiers behind us." [Narrator: Mortars are explosive shells that are fired high into the air. The high trajectory means that the shell will go almost straight up and then come back to Earth almost straight down up. When you 'range the shot, you fire a single mortar and watch where it lands. Then, you adjust the trajectory (higher or

lower) so that the next shot will come closer to the target. When the ranging mortar hits the target, the cannon handlers in the ship will adjust all of their cannons to be the same as the last ranging shot. The North Korean's defensive position is about to be obliterated by old technology delivered by a wooden sailing ship. Will had had created the mortar shells and was firing them.] "FIFTY METRES!" "WE HAVE WEAPONS BEHIND US!" The white clad enemy had weapons of shining beams of light. As the North Koreans watched, the enemy rose a few feet into the air and swooshed their weapons like a sword. The crackling noise of the light burning the air was quite disconcerting. As was the lack of ropes lifting the enemy into the air. "THEY HAVE LIGHT SABRES!" [Star Wars had been a great hit with the North Koreans, who had developed the movie and its technology before the US stole it. The Americans had put fake white faces over the Korean cinema stars to convince the Americans that Americans had made the film. At least that was what their Grand Poobah had told them. Bottom line, the North Koreans knew what that weapon could do. Who could forget that poor Luke had lost a hand?] "TWENTY FIVE METRES!" An amplified version of TG's voice broke into the sound of sizzling air. The voice said in Korean: "Choice one: suck on bomb. Choice two: lose head. Choice three: fib on ground and surrender." [You may recall from 'Raise the Jolly Lucas' (Book #3) that TG had learned a little Korean. That was in 2082. By now, he was more than a little rusty. The soldiers figured that options 1 and 2 were not healthy choices. They wanted to choose #3, so they laid face down on the ground, and fibbed in a loud voice things like 'I'm not scared' or 'I didn't pee my pants' and hoped for the best.]

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Chapter 27

Wrap up time. Before the operation, the Wilizy directors and the planners had discussed what they should do with the POWs. They couldn't in good conscience send them back to North Korea. They'd be dead the next day. Mind you, that would mean the North Korean army would be smaller, but that would be temporary only. Plenty of starving peasants would happily volunteer to serve. The army received bigger bowls of rice, and up to now, had never had to fight. The directors had decided to make a decision later when they saw how the operation had gone. That later is now. Hank and Jock spoke to the two freighter captains. They already had 35 POWs in their holds. The Wilizy had sixty-five more to store somewhere. The captains explained that North Koreans did manage from time to time to escape into South Korea, but that put the South Koreans in peril. [South Korea was in a perpetual state of pending war with North Korea depending on how crazy their Grand Poobah was at the time. North Korea had a lot of weapons and a big army. South Korea had a lot of targets. They dealt with North Korea as Falstaff, a Shakespearean character, advised. 'Discretion is the better part of valor.'] [Shakespeare lived in the 1500s, so those words may not make much sense to you in the 2090's. Translated, the saying could be translated into this hopeless choice: Confront NK and watch million of your citizens die; or avoid confrontation and continue to live in the hopes that the Grand Poobah and all of his rabid generals would collectively choke on a fish bone.] Thus, when faced with North Korean refugees, South Korea shipped them off to Japan, which was further away and somewhat safer on islands on the far side of a biggish Sea of Japan. The two captains said that they would take the POWs to Japan but they didn't know what was happening with their infrastructure cargo. # # # # # # # #

Stu had already messaged everybody that he and Momaka were safe and free to leave the guesthouse, but the government wanted to meet with them about the Japanese equipment. They'd be meeting in the Guest House at 1 pm. Jock and Hank should attend. The meeting was in the guesthouse's small living room. Two Cubans were sitting in chairs when Jock and Hank arrived. Both stood at their arrival. Stu made the necessary introductions. The two Cubans were Hector and Francisco, President and Vice President of Cuba. "Francisco was the private who delivered our meals to us daily," Stu explained. "Hector made sure that the man guarding us was always a trusted member of the police." "We didn't know if we could trust the North Koreans or not," Hector explained. "We didn't invite them into the country. They just arrived and started installing weaponry and building camps. Their general said that they were keeping us safe as part of our mutual defense pact." "How did they find out that the Japanese were here?" Hank asked. "Our army Chief of Staff told them privately and recommended that they bring help. That man has been retired." Stu continued explaining to Jock and Hank. "The government has apologized to us profusely and asks if we will please proceed with the power installation. I told them that Hank would have to make that decision." "You are one of our benefactors?" Hector asked. "I can speak on their behalf," Hank dodged. "The answer is that you may proceed to unload and install the cargo." "What about the North Koreans who surrendered?" Hector asked. "They are considered Prisoners of War," General Jock said. "Japan will receive them. We have to work out the details and arrange transportation, but it will be done." "Stu, our transportation will be leaving in an hour," Hank said. "Will you and

Momaka be coming with us?" "Stu is going to North Korea as our envoy," Hector informed. "We have decided to cancel the mutual defense pact." "We didn't think one party could cancel the agreement," Francisco informed. "We thought that both parties have to agree. Stu said that he'd find a way." "Stu and I are travelling to North Korea in Cuba's long range copter," Momaka reassured. "It has a big Cuban flag on it so we should be safe. We'll make our way home on our own after we return to Cuba."

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Chapter 28

Winnie found Emily with the other youngsters who were talking about the battles and what they had done. "Can I talk with you, Emily?" "Sure." "I'm not stopping you from meeting with the others?" "They're just bragging. They're not interested in hearing what I did." "Shall we go up to the crow's nest?" "That thing up on the top of the mast?" "Yes. It's way quieter there. We can talk together more easily." Talking together more easily didn't mean sitting together more easily. The crow's nest was built for one. But Emily was small and slender while Winnie was thin and taller. They ended up sitting side by side on their bums with their feet pressed against the other side of the nest. Their inner arms were rubbing together so Winnie linked their arms together and they ended up holding hands. "Too tight?" "No. It's like being in a cocoon." "I wanted to tell you how much I liked working with you during the battle," Winnie opened. "You handled my little test well. You were quick and decisive. I think you could become a good strategist for the family or a battlefield observer if that's what you wanted to be." "You and Melissa are the strategists. You don't need me." "Perhaps not right now. But what happens when you Will and Izzy and the others are the Wilizy. Who will do the planning for them? Who will organize the operation? Name one person."

... "I can't. They don't think things through. They're not good at organizing a plan and carrying it out." "Well, you know them better than I do. But if you want to, I can work with you when we have other battle opportunities. I thought we made a good team." "I'd like that." "Here's something else I liked about you. I liked how you organized your bedroom so that it didn't have up and down lines." "I didn't want a military bedroom." "I also liked your hobby. I was impressed with how hard you worked at it and the creativity you have." "I find it easy. I just put the fabric pieces on the board and then picture how they'll look with other pictures. I don't mind the time that I spend at it. I lose track of time." "Is that why you spend so much time in your bedroom?" "I guess." "Here's something that I didn't like. I didn't like what that librarian was doing with you." "She's nice. She asks me how things are going and then leaves me alone." "The librarian is paid by the school for being in the library and teaching students. She's also supposed to do all the things that you are doing. I looked it up. What you're doing is part of her job. She's taking the money but she's not doing her job. And she's leaving early while you are preparing the reports that she should be preparing for the next day. That's not right." "I do it properly," Emily said defensively. "I'm sure you do. That's not the point. Here's an operation that you and I can

work on when we get home. I believe that the librarian is lying when she leaves early and tells you that she has to pick up her kids. I could show you how to place drones so that you could check her story. You need to know how to use drones in operations. This way, you'd be able to learn how to do that." "Could I continue to work in the library while we run the operation?" "Sure. You can read the drones from your bedroom each evening." "OK. I think you're wrong though. She's very nice to me. She wouldn't lie." "That's settled then. I'm going to make a confession. When I first met you, I thought you would be too timid to be a warrior. You weren't. I was happy to see that." "Why did you think I was too timid?" "Because of how you hide in your bedroom so much." "What? I don't hide." "I understand why you're doing it. But, it's still hiding. It makes you look sort of not brave. I know you're brave. I've seen you in action. But, you are hiding." "What am I hiding from?" "You are hiding from a big problem that you don't how to solve. And so, you don't try to solve it. You live in your bedroom and I believe you plan to live in your bedroom until you're old enough to move out of the house." "What's wrong with that?" "You're thinking only of yourself. I understand why you do that. I struggled with the same thing." "What do you mean?" "You're not thinking of your mom and what your self-isolation in your bedroom is doing to her." "She's military."

"Yes, she is. Does that mean that she can't be hurt?" "I can't live with her. She makes me so mad." "So you hide from a big problem. You don't try to solve it. When we're on an operation together, and I ask you to do something scary, will you tell me that you don't want to work on a hard scary operation?" "No." "That's because you are not timid. You're a sensitive girl, that's all. And that means that when your mom doesn't give you a chance to make a mistake and then solve it yourself, you get angry. So, you hide in your room where she can't come. There, if you make a mistake, you can fix it. You don't like looking stupid in front of your mom." ... "I had trouble with my mom too but for a different reason. She drove me crazy because she didn't want me to take any risks. She was trying to protect me. I wish I could say that I handed it better than I did. But, I have a good relationship with her now. You won't have a good relationship with your mom if you don't tell her why you're mad at her." "She doesn't like making mistakes. She swears when she does something wrong. Military people aren't supposed to make mistake. How am I'm supposed to tell her that she's doing something wrong? I'm a kid." "Look at this way. When you make a mistake, you want a second chance at whatever you're doing, right?" "Right." "Shouldn't she deserve the same treatment? A second chance? Wouldn't that be fair?" "I guess." "The only problem is that she doesn't know that she's making a mistake. She doesn't know that you're sensitive to making mistakes. How is she supposed to

fix that if she doesn't know why you're mad?" "I'm a kid. How am I supposed to do that?" "I have an idea." # # # # # # # #

The next evening. I had an interesting evening with Emily tonight, Winnie. What kind of interesting, Mac? At supper, she put a little card on my plate inviting me to her room for a talk. She even put in a time. And? I came up and knocked on the door. She opened it and invited me in. I had a sweater on and she asked if she could hang that up for me. I said no. She offered me something to munch on and to drink. She has a micro fridge in her room, Winnie! Then, she gave me a tour of her bedroom, which took much longer to complete than I would have thought. Did you know that she's completely reoriented her bedroom? And, she's doing 3D art. Yes, I noticed that when I was there. She showed me all the bins and what she does with the fabric. It was amazing. She invited me to sit and showed me to a chair. She sat down on the bed and talked to me like woman to woman. Here's what she said. "I have been mad at you for some time, but I didn't realize that you might not know why. You deserve to know. I shouldn't have kept it from you. That was not brave of me. Perhaps you're mad at me too and I might not know that. Why don't we each tell each other one thing that makes us mad? Would you like to go first or second?"

Sounds very mature for a 10-year old. She's changed a lot from this operation. I could never have sat down with my mom or my dad and talk about things I thought they were doing wrong. That's what she did. Good. Is everything fine now? Yes. I won't mother her so much any more. She took offense when I tried to tell her how to do things better. I didn't realize how sensitive she is. She's going to come out of her bedroom and share what she's doing now. Did you know that she is heavily involved in the school library? I knew that she spent a lot of time there. She described what she was doing and asked if I thought the librarian was taking advantage of her. I said that I thought she was. She thought for a bit and then said that she was going to quit working at the library. She has never asked me for advice before, let alone take it. Good. I'm happy for both of you. I smell a Winnie presence in this invitation somewhere. Perhaps a little. More than a little. I saw the two of you fly up to the crow's nest. Thank you. I didn't do much. And you thought that you weren't mother material.

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Chapter 29

Stu and Momaka didn't have any trouble crossing the land border between North and South Korea because they didn't travel that way. This was probably a smart move. Ants were searched when they tried to cross. Instead, they entered the country via the Yellow Sea and landed at the Pyongyang copter port. In addition to the flag of Cuba that was emblazoned on both sides of the cabin, Momaka had hung a white sheet from the copter tail indicating that they came in peace. This didn't stop the copter from being surrounded by about twenty customs agents, all with guns drawn. The abundance of agents was probably because they had nothing else to do. The port was absolutely empty of copters or people wanting to fly in one. The agents surrounded them and walked them carefully into the building. Stu was wearing his best suit, which would no longer qualify as his best. It barely qualified as a suit. Pyongyang is a long way from Cuba. Momaka was wearing a freshly aired formal kimono. She had hung it out of the copter window that morning. The interior of the customs building was empty. The footsteps of the guards echoed in the open space. The guards took them up two flights of stairs, still in a circle around the two presumed spies. That meant that half of the guards were climbing stairs backwards with guns that were pointed at the two presumed spies. Try not to sneeze. Thanks, Stu. Now I have to sneeze. The guards accompanied them to an office with one desk and one chair. Guess who got the chair As soon as the guards left, Momaka sneezed five times. Like a machine gun. Good thing that she had held it in. [The agent spoke able English. I will not attempt to describe what able means.]

"Purpose of visit?" "I'm here as an official envoy of the Cuban government. Here are my papers documenting that I am on official business for the Cuban government. I am here to speak with your president on behalf of the Cuban government. My wife is accompanying me on that official business for the Cuban government." "What's a Cuba?" "Cuba is a country in the Caribbean Ocean. The country is an ally of North Korea. Your president likes them." "Have you been spying on the president?" "No. Of course not." "How do you know that he likes this Cuba place?" "He signed a treaty with Cuba that declared that North Korea and Cuba were friends. I have a copy of it here in my briefcase." "You look like you're an American." "I'm a Canadian." "What's that?" "A country in North America." "So you it that you are an American." "Canada is a neighbour of the United States like China is a neighbor with you." "This woman looks Japanese." "She is my wife. She was born in Japan." "Why do you want to see the president?" "I have very bad news to give him. Perhaps I should give the bad news to you and we'll leave. You can give the news to the President."

"Very bad news you said?" "Yes. Very bad." The customs officer fished in his pocket and pulled out a plastic whistle. He blew two quick tweets, one long one, and another four tweets. They echoed in the building. The whistle signal produced one set of running footsteps that also echoed. A single security guard looked into the office and bowed. "Take these two to the palace. Watch them closely. They are spies from America and Japan." # # # # # # # #

Stu had found the secret. After the interrogation in the copter port, all the subsequent conversations went like this. "Why do you want to see the president?" "I have very bad news to give him. Perhaps I should give the bad news to you and we'll leave. You can give the news to the President." "Very bad news you said?" "Yes. Very bad." "Go to ... " # # # # # # # #

"Very bad news you said?" "Yes. Very bad." "Go to ... " And so on. At least they got to see the palace. Inside it looked like a tenement

building from the early days of the industrial revolution in Britain. So, perhaps the tour could have been skipped # # # # # # # #

"Why do you want to see the president?" "I have very bad news to give him. Perhaps I should give the bad news to you and we'll leave. You can give the news to the president." "Very bad news you said?" "Yes. Very bad." "The president is in a meeting with his cabinet. I shouldn't interrupt. You don't look Cuban." "I'm not. The Cuban president empowered me to act as his envoy. Here are my credentials." "Does this have something to do with the observers he sent to Cuba?" "Yes, it does." "The receptionist rose out of her chair, scurried into the hallway, put two fingers in her mouth, and whistled. Heads in the bullpen rose to look. Other heads popped out of doorways and looked. She pointed her hands at the exits and the floor emptied. "Coffee break," she explained to Stu. Tap tap. "Oh GLORIOUS AND ESTEEMED LEADER, the Cuban president has sent you a gift. Will you meet with him and his wife?" "A gift?" "Yes, MASTER OF THE EARTH, SUN AND MOON. He sent a gift." "Send him in. Bring more bottles. We're running out."

"Yes, CONQUEROR OF MY HEART." Conqueror of her heart? She's 65 years old if she's a day. Are you jealous? I better not be the gift. Are you sure you know what you're doing? We'll find out soon enough. # # # # # # # #

Stu and Momaka had made it into the inner sanctum. This was a huge ballroom with a high ceiling and big, high windows offering a wonderful view of the ocean. The ballroom served as Esteemed Leader's throne room. Naturally, the throne was on a dais that put him above everybody else. It also had a plush seat and back. Next to his throne was a table with eight empty bottles. When Esteemed Leader said that 'we were running out,' he was using the royal we. His cabinet sat on kitchen chairs arranged in a semi circle below him. Stu and Momaka were also on kitchen chairs below the throne and in front of the semi circle. One of Momaka's chair legs was missing a plastic glidey thing and so she was sitting a little lopsided. She tried not to lean. "The president of Cuba wants to cancel our mutual trade treaty? Why?" "He didn't share that with me, Mr. President. I am a mere servant doing his bidding." "He can't cancel the treaty. It takes both countries to cancel the treaty." "That's what I thought too. But his copy of the treaty says that either party can cancel after thirty days of notice." "That's impossible. I wouldn't have agreed." "Perhaps somebody in Cuba altered the agreement. He doesn't have loyal followers like you do. If I could see the original agreement, I could return to

Cuba and reassure him that the people who are whispering in his ear are wrong. It would take a mere minute." "MISS MONEYPENNY!" "Yes, James?" This is one sick man. She might be the original Moneypenny. # # # # # # # #

"Are you satisfied now?" "Yes, Mr. President." Stu's briefcase was closed and on the floor between him and Momaka. The original treaty was on top of his briefcase for delivery to Miss Moneypenny when they left. "I recall something about you bringing me a gift. Is it her?" "I fear not. I am aware of your hatred of the Japanese. That would be insensitive of me although I'm sure she would enjoy the honor." Watch it. My finger is on my laser. It might hit you first. Have you noticed that nobody has a weapon in this room? Not even Esteemed Cow Pie. I noticed. I was counting on it. Relax. Everything is going well. "Before I give you the gift, I regret that I have bad news to deliver to you." "How bad?" "Very bad. I am simply the messenger." "Get on with it." "Mr. President, you recently sent about 100 soldiers to Cuba."

"Observers, not soldiers." "I was not a witness to their observing, but I have been told by some Cubans that the observers brought two nuclear tipped ballistic missiles and set them up in Havana. They also prepared the basics of an army camp and set up a defensive line on the beach. They also boarded two Japanese freighters who were delivering the gift of a vital power network infrastructure to the Cubans and locked up both crews." "The soldiers are in Cuba to test launch the missiles. The other soldiers are there to observe that launch." "And the power infrastructure?" "Stolen from us by the Japanese. We are simply taking it back." "The target of the missiles?" "Yankee dogs, of course." "You were going launch a nuclear weapon against the US." "That's why we had the treaty with Cuba. It's our launching pad." "And after that? Japan?" "Certainly, Japan. What's the point of having nuclear weapons if you don't use them?" "Here's the really bad news, President. Your two missiles were destroyed before they could be fired. Your entire army has been captured and imprisoned. They laid down on the beach and surrendered. None of them fired a shot." "You lie. I was told that you were an American spy." "I am." Stu....... "And my wife is a Japanese spy."

Stu....... Easy. "You will die." "We knew this was a suicide mission, but we had to come. I have to know something before we die. That's all I ask. Let me ask you some questions. Then, you can kill us. I'll even confess in front of a camera that I am an American spy. What do you have to lose?" "Ask." Stu stood up and cleared his throat. He grabbed the lapels of his suit and took his favorite Stu, the lawyer, pose. "Your Eminence, I'm curious why you hate the Japanese so much." "They ed the Americans who gave them weapons. Their weapons were better than ours." "You couldn't take that. You had to fight back some how. Is that true?" "Yes." "What did you do?" "I sent in spies to look for Japanese or Americans who could be blackmailed." "What would you blackmail them with?" "Evidence of criminal behavior." "Where did you collect this evidence?" "Various locations near American installations." "Was one of those locations in Miyagi Prefecture?" "Yes."

"Was that location in the city of Ishinomaki?" "Yes." "Did your people blackmail Americans in the house on Manga Road?" Stu....... "Yes." "What kind of criminal behavior was happening in that house?" "Sex with young girls. The houses were called Pleasure Palaces." Stu!!!! "How did you find the girls?" "The people we hired kidnapped them." Stu, I can't hold Bob back much longer! Why are you trying to, Momaka? Good question. # # # # # # # #

Narrator: When Momaka released Bob, he took the form of an Asian dragon known as an Imugi, as depicted on the cover of this book. Generally, Imugi were large, multi-colored benevolent creatures and sighting them was associated with good luck. Unfortunately, he wasn't lucky for Cow Pie and his cabinet. Bob, the visible imugi, swooped through the large ballroom and shredded the bodies of every North Korean in Cow Pie's court starting with Cow Pie. Then, he burst through the window and began hunting for military installations. That's where some good luck came for the citizens of North Korea. Bob destroyed every military installation and every form of military weaponry he could find. Copters were crushed. Underground silos were flamed beyond recognition.

North Korea as a military state full of weapons run by a despot disappeared in one afternoon. Here's a little history of good old Bob. The first time my readers saw Bob was in 2084 when Momaka ed the family. That same year, Ingrid, TG's wicked mother, shipped a load of baby clones to North Korea. TG changed the settings on the genetics equipment so that North Korea would receive only Type A personalities. Type A babies were programmed to be very assertive and to take charge of everybody and everything. Those Type A's are now twelve years old and North Korea is no longer a military state. Guess what's going to happen. # # # # # # # #

"Where are we?" "Two days away from Cuba. Have you recovered?" "I'm getting there. Bob's Asian body was easier to control. Not so heavy. I have happy exhausted muscles. How'd you find the Pleasure Palace that I worked in?" "You shuddered when we walked by it. While you were strolling through the city's gardens, I was in their land title offices. I found the connection to North Korea." "Were you always planning to go to North Korea after Cuba?" "No. The opportunity presented itself. The plan pretty much wrote itself." "Where's Bob?" "You left him behind in North Korea." "I can't say that I'll miss him." "Even dragons have to leave their nest." "What kind of Voodoo curse did you put on Cow Pie when you cleared your throat."

"He was compelled to answer questions and to tell the truth." "One of Marie's?" "No, it's a favorite of mine. It's very courtroom friendly. Did you want to drop in on Japan?" "No. That chapter of my life is finally over. I'm exhausted. Can you curse me to sleep?" "Mfdrixti."

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Chapter 30: Epilog

Narrator: Obviously, I could not have witnessed what happened in North Korea since I was on the Wilizy/Europe at the time. I don't know the exact words that were spoken in North Korea, but the events that transpired did happen that way. Bob annihilated the military command and all signs that they had existed. From what Petey shared with me much later, I know that Stu used Voodoo to compel Esteemed Cow Pie to reveal how he had been instrumental in Momaka's horrible childhood. He did that deliberately to allow her to release some demons. Momaka never suffered again from her memories of what had happened to her. Stu continued to hide his powers from the Wilizy for some years. Some hints of him being a Voodoo king have appeared in previous books. He served as Nary's father at her wedding for example. He was indeed her father. He was instrumental in helping Kashmira in Wheelchair Moccasins, #10. In Old Stone Face, #14, Stu helped Paula stand up to her husband when she testified against him. He assisted Sheila and Stook several times when they were attacked, and again when they were making plans to create a Western consortium of states. He also knew a lot about Theo that would be hard to explain if he didn't have a direct link into Gossip Central through Momaka. Yes, Momaka knew about him when she married him. Yes, the Papa Legba body that Theo saw in The Coconut of Truth (#31) was Stu's real body. As to Cuba, Stu handed both copies of the Defense Pact to Hector and told him that North Korea had agreed to end the agreement. Since the Korean government didn't exist any more, nobody could contradict him. Japan held on to the POWs until news filtered out of North Korea that a new, non-military government was tearing down the wall between North and South. That government was led by citizens who TG would characterize as Type A. Japan returned the POWs as a sign of good faith. Although there were some talks about reunification of the two Koreas, those never led anywhere. North Korea was agrarian; South Korea was business oriented. They were too different. Eventually they established good relations, but they didn't want to be the same country. As to Bob, Momaka had indicated to him that he wasn't needed any longer. He

didn't have anywhere else to go, so he hung around North Korea. The citizens learned very quickly what he had done, but were afraid of him and would stay clear of him. They'd see him sitting on top of buildings and looking down at what was happening below. He'd bathe in the ocean, but never ate anybody. He didn't even roast anybody a little. They learned that he was friendly. They even gave him a name: Yong, which in Korean means dragon. People would approach Yong in boats and offer him gifts of appreciation, which were usually food oriented. They didn't know what else to give him. They had no idea what his hobbies were other than killing dictators and they didn't have any more of those to offer him. Yong ate the gifts. He was, after all, a dragon. He supplemented the gifts with a diet of rats. Agrarian countries are usually plagued with rats, which break into the storage silos of grains. Eating those rats led to more gifts. One Type A took the initiative to establish a friendship with him of sorts. She'd swim with Yong in the ocean. She'd stand next to him when he took a shower under a waterfall to wash off the salt from the ocean. When she stood with him, she got drenched. The next time they went to the waterfall, Yong shielded her with his wings. One day, through hand gestures and tugs, she took Yong to a primary school. Naturally, he couldn't fit inside the school, so he sat outside on the playground. "The children are scared of you," she explained. "I know that you would never hurt them but they don't know that. Let them touch you." So he did. And then he went to other schools on his own to let the children touch him because deep down, he was a friendly benevolent dragon. That's what Imugis are by nature. Later, students would come out of their school and Yong would be sitting on the playground, serving as a piece of playground equipment that they could climb on. It was 2202 when some bright person suggested that they needed to banish the country's old flag with its red star and blue banners. North Korea was not what this flag meant any more. A member of the country's parliament saw Yong, soaring in the sky, two large baskets full of children hanging from his talons. "I have a great idea for our new flag," he said. So, they had a photo shoot, and they took a great picture of the children waving

from the baskets in a blue sky. That became their flag. I would have put that image on the cover of this book but Yong's company holds the copyright and they wouldn't give permission until Yong has read this book. Yong can read in Korean, but English is a challenge. I know that many of my readers believe that my books are just imaginative mischief. You may believe that invisibility, or time-travel, or Cops of the Cosmos do not exist. It's hard for me to prove that they do. Perhaps you may even ask yourself, Do dragons exist? Just take a look at North Korea's 2202 flag. The answer to your question is clear. Yes! Dragons Exist! Back to the Table of Contents

Books in the Wilizy series

As of July 2021, there were thirty-three free novels in the Wilizy series. Check below to see if you've missed any.

Book #1: I Got'cha

If you think being a teenager in today's world is tough, try being one in 2081. In Alberta's It's Only Fair society, your brain-band will zap you just for chewing with your mouth open. One boy pried his brain-band off to see what living with emotions would be like. Being chased by the entire Alberta army was bad enough. It became worse when another 15 year old kid offered to help him escape.

Book #2: The Get-Even Bird

Will and Izzy are forced to flee from Zzyk's army. After months away from Alberta, they fly their sailing ship into B.C. thinking that they would be safe there. Bad mistake! Izzy is captured. All Will has to do to save her life is turn himself in for a free brain-band fitting appointment. That's what happens when you wear a Zorro costume to a dance.

Book #3: Assassination Day

A DPS technician offers to defect if the Wilizy will rescue his daughter from The Citadel – some super smart military people who are friends with Zzyk. Izzy

thinks that their new recruit is an assassin, but Yollie insists that he's a decent man. Can assassins be decent men? It will take a hair-raising experience to find out.

Book #4: Hoist the Jolly Lucas

It's bad enough that Zzyk pins the blame for two assassinations on Izzy and launches a full out assault on their home compound. But then, another enemy takes advantage of a security lapse to get revenge for a war that happened 20 years ago. The Wilizy are left reeling with two key kidnapped and stashed where they can't be found, let alone rescued. For the family to survive, everybody must enter the battle. The story is as much about the past as it is about the present.

Book #5: Teenage Mutant Ninja Torpedoes (Yes, this is a Wilizy book.)

Mac disappears and doesn't want to be found. Will and Wolf use time-travel to search for her and discover secrets she wouldn't want them to know. The Alaskans attack when Will is finding out what happens to a submarine's air when it is lying helpless on the ocean floor. Between the Alaskans' impenetrable fortress and their bubblegum weapons, life is going to get a little sticky for the Wilizy.

Book #6: Bob, the Invisible Dragon

Raging hormones as well as Raging Gardeners play key roles when young Wilizy warriors are attacked and the Wilizy's scientific marvels offer no protection. The youngsters' future will rely on a different kind of warrior

protecting them. Warning: events at the end of the story will move quickly. They certainly won't drag on. Book #7: Nary, Nary, Quite Contrary

Theo and Lucas move to Toronto to live on their own. Both meet girls but neither is brave enough to introduce his new friend to the family. They wouldn't have the time anyway, what with villains trying to assassinate them and Voodoo royalty greeting them as though they were Voodoo gods. At the end of the story, Lucas receives a surprise Boxing Day gift that leaves him speechless. Book #8: Maddy's a Baddy

Maddy had escaped from Big Momma only to find herself all alone in the cold and begging for food in Eastern Canada. While she's trying to return to her home in Seattle, the Wilizy have their own problems. Everybody in the family is intent on bringing the judge to justice for what he did to Lucas. It would have been so easy for them to rescue Maddy, but they didn't know anything about her.

Book #9: Bite Me!

Spurred on by Marie's desire to eat a meal with her former slave masters, the Wilizy plan to put Safe Haven ranches out of business. In the process, they encounter two foreign assassins intent on abducting Maddy. Theo and Nary become closer but a red-eyed chaperone does not approve. The Wilizy's war with Safe Haven starts with a bang but ends with a whimper.

Book #10: Wheelchair Moccasins!

A 13 year old girl pretends to turn to prostitution to gain her freedom from her crime boss father. In Wilizy family news, Winnie agrees not to meddle in Mathias' love life. No, the world isn't ending, so long as you don't have a green vegetable for your name. Best advice ever? If somebody wearing moccasins and sitting in a wheelchair offers to sing you to sleep... run!

Book #11: Trial by Nick

After the Scandinavians attack their home base, Winnie develops an idea for defeating Crown Prince Wilhelm that is a dramatic departure from their normal military battles. In their personal lives, the Toronto teenagers have to become schnobs to keep their basketball futures alive, Lucas and Lylah begin dating, and two of EmmaGee's personalities leave her body. Book #12. Tickled Pink

A man uses his unlimited wealth and power to assault women without fear of legal consequences. If they object, he'll humiliate them publicly and ruin their lives. If they don't stand up to him, their lives as they knew them will be over. But how do you fight a man who is above the law? Here's how. The Raging Gardeners help the women while Winnie attacks him where he isn't looking.

Book #13: Second Base

Granny and Doc enjoy a spirited life in their new Australian house while Bean has to adjust to her mother ing her in the Wilizy cadet camp. She meets a charming man with country pumpkin witticisms whose entire life is dedicated to becoming a cold blooded killer. Meanwhile, Safe Haven's impenetrable offices aren't as safe as they thought they were.

Book #14: Old Stone Face

Bean moves to Toronto with her sheriff who takes a job as a private detective. Before long, he's trying to bring a mad scientist to justice - the same man that Winnie is after. With both the Wilizy and a countrified sheriff after the same man, you'd think he'd be easy to catch. Too bad there are no laws about a mad scientist killing twenty-one babies.

Book #15: the Halocracy

Reese finds Annika - his first, and only, girl friend. For reasons that nobody fully understands, he sort of kidnaps her but she willingly accompanies him to the far side of globe. Reese figures out later that she could be trying to seduce him when in fact, she's actually going to try to kill him.

Book #16: Coffee Can Kill Ya!

Convincing Paula's brother to give her a proper share of her parents' estate had seemed so easy. Turned out that it wasn't so easy after all. In the Wilizy's defense, murdering extra-terrestrials that tried to kidnap a corpse created unique challenges. To their credit, the Wilizy dealt with those. But, how do you deal with something that you can't see and don't even know exists?

Book #17: Nice Birthday Party, Governor.

Plot twists abound as the Wilizy take on the Colorado government and the NORAD military simultaneously. Maddy quits the cadet corp to run a secret operation that ends in a one-on-one battle. Melissa breaks Reese out of jail and Cowboy shows his dramatic talents, which do not include stripping. Winnie directs two dramatic productions but only one of these involves wearing respectable clothes.

Book #18: The Tale of the Scorpion's Tail

The Wilizy have to neutralize NORAD's nuclear missiles while defeating their air force without causing any casualties. A special weapon (guided bird poop) will be needed. Meanwhile, Heaven's guardian angels are under attack from within. The key to success? Rescuing a gerbil imprisoned in an escape-proof cage. "Molly Moonblossom" and "Nympho Maniac" play key roles. One of these actors is Winnie.

Book #19: Brunhilda, the Steamroller.

Billy Bump resurfaces and plans Maddy's death. Winnie accepts a secret mission but runs afoul of Yolanda, who is sure that she has a boyfriend. Yolanda's vision that Winnie will be attacked comes true. Demonic infiltrators into Heaven escape detection when the steamroller named Brunhilda prosecutes Arthur and finds him guilty. This time, he won't be going back to guardian angel school. Book #20: Lock Up Your Corn Starch!

While Paula, Winnie and Arthur are on a perilous mission for Heaven, the Wilizy family is trying to rescue Charlie and Sheila from prison. Wilizy forces battle demented escaped convicts intent on slaughtering innocent victims to help a brown supremacist politician win an election. If you're intent on going to Hell

when you die, be sure to read this book for a preview of what's waiting for you.

Book #20: The Champion Kisser

Melissa's Operation Beef Jerky, featuring pragmatic momma cows and flying unbranded calves, goes after a stinky justice. In Hell, Winnie has to deal with a dead pharmacist and an asparagus-shaped devil geek in her operation against the perfume-toting, hog-riding Rat. On her side is a pussy tat named Santa Claws and a junk food eating canary that has a fatal encounter with a loaded frying pan.

Book #21: The Champion Kisser

Melissa's Operation Beef Jerky, featuring pragmatic momma cows and flying unbranded calves, goes after a stinky justice. In Hell, Winnie has to deal with a dead pharmacist and an asparagus-shaped devil geek in her operation against the perfume-toting, hog-riding Rat. On her side is a pussy tat named Santa Claws and a junk food eating canary that has a fatal encounter with a loaded frying pan.

Book #22: Black Cats: Lucky or Unlucky?

Strange characters abound in this story. You'll meet a woman named Fido, a purple gnome, a mining gal that can make a cowhand vibrate, a safe-cracking masked marauder, a stinker bell, a high wire gymnast afraid of height, three hench-devils, and a devil wearing an Elizabethan ebony doublet, complete with raven black satin breeches and a heart shaped codpiece. Oh yeah. There's also a black cat.

Book #23: Morgana Foils the Duke's Plans

In Book #23, you'll meet a zesty Zulu goddess who pulls a spear of gold out of a lake bed. An angel named Prudence has a potty mouth. A dolphin in the Cops of the Cosmos arranges for Heaven to invade Hell. Queen Guinevere meets Sir Galahad, Sir Lance Lott, and Sir Launchalot, one of whom is not gallant. The perfume toting Morgana wields a devilish weapon of mass olfaction.

Book #24: Who Painted Lord Percy?

Book #24 asks the question: Who Painted Lord Percy? The suspects include: a dead man who hunts perverts, a condom buying female angel, the devil named Gold Pinkies, a cherry pie barfing angel, a mortal resigned to ing The Borg's beehive, a skinny-dipping ghost, a devil named Adolf Hitler, an angel who can't pucker up to kiss, and the angels who protected Christopher Columbus.

Book #25: Happy Valentine's Day

Maddy is kidnapped by a witless devil named Pig Snout who stashes her in a retail outlet in Hell. With the help of Molly Moonblossom and Fanny Fandigity, the Wilizy bring a bullying businessman to justice and do it in a dandy way. Reese enjoys Valentine's Day in a way he never expected. A new hero emerges from the Wilizy's past. It will be nigh impossible for readers to guess who she is. Book #26: Lights, Camera, Action

Winnie gets a new angelic body, meets an angel from the medieval era, and gets a crash course on trident-shaped spaceships. Meanwhile, Satan is planning multiple changes to Hell that will have dangerous consequences for the Cosmos as well as for all female devils. If Winnie's three operations are successful, afterlife in Hell could be less misogynistic and perhaps even entertaining.

Book #27: Bring your PJs

Readers will witness a treacherously-honest and bigoted politician take over a government and attack a defenseless opponent without warning. [Spoiler alert: This is the dastardly villain.] You'll also see heroes perform the national chicken revolution dance, defeat cheaters in a spaceship war, survive being cursed, and sneak off for a little romance without being caught by an all-knowing deity.

Book #28: Queen Karita's Revenge

In this book, a brown-supremacist, power hungry politician uses her drunken army to subdue Nevada and Utah. The Wilizy use 'free trade' to defeat her. Readers will also learn about a strip-teasing jail-bait assassin, underage mortals entering and leaving Hell, Molly Moonblossom at work, the word

'gazendogalapadus,' Winnie becoming a mother, and Karita's cockamamie revenge.

Book #29: I am the Light

In this story, you'll read about an R-rated welcome home costume, a bright light that talked, Sheila' and Stook's unwilling assassin, a pregnant ghost, a horse that could whinny a song, a female starship captain that was punished for exceeding planetary speed limits, an angel with vampire teeth, and a drug boss who wore pink panties that were far too small for him. The bra fit nicely though. Book #30: Cathog

Asmodeus' plan to capture Galahad, Shields and Winnie is two-thirds successful when Winnie finds out what has happened. She knows that her efforts to rescue them might end up with a trip to Planet Corpse, but walks into the trap anyway. Justice investigates Satan and Burger King but can't prove anything. They go unpunished. Spoiler alert: No cat-hogs were harmed in the publication of this novel.

Book #31: The Coconut of Truth

Reese succeeds in his first trial by using a truth-compelling coconut. Marie's adjusted babysitting body is effective, but disconcerting. Justice offers Winnie a smoking hot time if she takes on a solo operation. This will present Lucy, Ricky, Fred and Ethel in cameo appearances before an unconventional God. Winnie solves the case with smoke and mirrors. She didn't need the guillotine at all.

Book #32: Merly

Readers will meet Merly, a young teenage mermaid who doesn't want her father to marry her to the highest bidder. (Almost extinct mermaids are a valuable marriage commodity in the Cosmos.) Merly uses two devils, PornoGuy and Old Geezer, to illustrate what will happen to any husband if he touches her. Here's some advice if you run into her. Don't listen to her singing. She has a potent E I E I O.

Book #33: Yes! Dragons Exist!

Merly's mermaids bring watery justice to Blubber-Guts, a grossly overweight inner pentagram devil. Meanwhile, the Wilizy family sends a sailing ship into battle against Esteemed Cow Pie's nuclear tipped missiles. Not to worry. The Valkyries had their giggles locked and loaded. The super-secret agent who infiltrated the Wilizy in Book #3 is revealed. You have 150 pages to guess who it is.

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About the Author

David J. Wighton is a retired educator who enjoys writing youth novels when he's not on a basketball court coaching middle-school girls. The books in his Wilizy series peek at how people lived after the word's governments collapsed in the chaos that followed the catastrophic rise in ocean levels and the disappearance of the world's last deposits of oil.

Wighton's novels have strong teenage characters driving the plot and facing challenges that, in many respects, are no different from what teenagers face today. His novels are intended to entertain and readers will find adventure, romance, suspense, humour, a strong focus on family, plus a touch of whimsy. Wighton also writes to provoke a little thought about life in today's societies and what the future might bring. Teachers may find the series useful in the classroom and the novels are priced with that intent in mind. Back to the Table of Contents